Late Night with Conan O'Brien

Season 12 Episode 161

Rob Schneider, Andre "3000" Benjamin, Louis C.K.

Aired Weekdays 12:35 AM Aug 11, 2005 on NBC
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Episode Summary

Rob Schneider, Andre "3000" Benjamin, Louis C.K.
Rob Schneider, Andre "3000" Benjamin, Louis C.K. Comedy bits included "Late Night Nick & Jessica Small Talk Moment," "New State Quarters" and Conan sings a "Late Night Lullaby."

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    Trivia, Notes, Quotes and Allusions


    • TRIVIA (0)

    • QUOTES (5)

      • New State Quarters
        Illinois: "Where Cruise first lost it"

        Alabama: "Now with Dentists!"

        Montana: "#1 in barbed wire accidents"

        Colorado: "Hey if you squint, our mountains kinda look like boobs"

        Delaware: "We must be famous for something, just give us a minute"

        Washington: "Sooner or later, this quarter will end up in Bill Gates' pocket"

        Georgia: "Checking Florida's prostate since Colonial times"

        Florida: "Get off our lawn!"

        Arizona: "Leading the nation in alien probes"

        New Jersey: "Pretending to be from New York for over two hundred years"

      • Conan: In a recent interview, Jose Conseco's ex-wife said that, thanks to steroids, Conseco has tiny shriveled testicles. Yeah, or as Clay Aiken calls them "Fun Size!"

      • Conan: Next month, a cell phone company is going to start selling a mobile phone that resembles the communicators featured in Star Trek. Yeah, Star Trek fans are really excited 'cause for an extra thousand dollars the phone comes with a girl's phone number.

      • Conan: Rafael Palmeiro in the news again, Rafael Palmeiro was eligible to rejoin the Baltimore Orioles' today after serving a ten day suspension for failing a steroids test. Yeah, yeah he was off for ten days. Palmeiro said he spent the time off collecting jars of other men's urine.

      • Conan: President Bush still on his, I think it is nine week working vacation. It's not really nine weeks but hes' on his working vacation right now. Here's the latest, today in Crawford, Texas President Bush met with his defense team and foreign policy team, yeah they briefed him on the state of global affairs and he showed them how to pop a wheelie on a mountain bike.

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