Timothy Hutton |
Nathan "Nate" Ford |
Gina Bellman |
Sophie Devereaux |
Christian Kane |
Eliot Spencer |
Beth Riesgraf |
Parker |
Aldis Hodge |
Alec Hardison |
Dave Foley |
Eben Dooley Jr. |
Guest Star |
Wil Wheaton |
Colin "Chaos" Mason |
Guest Star |
Charlie Brewer |
Crooked Santa |
Guest Star |
Parker: Okay, bad enough it's Christmas and there's no snow on the ground, but this is Santa we're talking about, okay? We can't turn away Santa!
Nate: You know that's not really Santa, right?
Parker: Obviously. Santa lives at the North Pole.
Nate: Hey, Eliot. You in the spirit yet?
Eliot: Ho, ho, ho.
Annoying Kid: Wait! I want a Rubbery Robby!
Eliot: You're gonna get a Sammy spanking, you don't get off my lap.
Parker: Don't worry! Santa just hasn't had his morning nog yet! You're Santa! Respect the suit.
Eliot: Parker, this beard is itchy. All right? And somebody peed on my lap earlier. And everybody wants a... Rub Me Robby.
Parker: "Rubbery Robby." It's a toy.
Eliot: This is the worst job ever.
Parker: This is the best job ever.
Eliot: Nate, I don't understand why you couldn't play Santa.
Nate: Well, you know, Dooley's seen me, first of all, and secondly, you just fit in better with the other Santas.
Eliot: Really? You're the ex-con.
Nate: Yeah, but you're just so... jolly.
Hardison: Jolly. (laughs)
Eliot: Hardison, I'm gonna... I got a lump of coal with your name on it!
Nate: What, he set the EMP on "toast"?
Hardison: He killed her, Nate. I hate him. I hate him.
Nate: She was a good van. We'll get you another.
Eben: Ah, Santa, how are we gonna top this next year, huh?
Frank: Do you mean I have my job back?
Eben: I think this mall can use a Santa year-round.
Frank: Ho ho ho ho ho ho! You are high on the holiday spirit.
Eben: Yes, I am! And pills mixed with morphine. I can't believe you let me drive here.
Chaos: You have to admit, it was a good plan.
Hardison: Yeah. But there was one thing you didn't count on.
Chaos: Oh, no.
Hardison: You forgot...
Chaos: No. No.
Hardison: About the true meaning...
Chaos: No. Don't say it!
Hardison: Of Christmas.
Chaos: Aah! That barely applies here!
Hardison: Ho ho ho.
International Airdates:
UK: May 8, 2012 on FX/FX HD
Filming Location: Jansen Beach Mall, Portland (mall interiors)
When Eliot first appears as Santa, the family posing with him for a photo is played by director Marc Roskin and his real-life family.
Injoke: One of the doctors announced over the hospital is Dr. Raymondjack. Benjamin Raymond Jack is the show's associate producer.
Chaos: Hello, Sophie. It's the Grinch who stole Christmas.
Referencing one of Dr. Seuss's characters in his books, the green-skinned Grinch who plots against the town of Whoville to steal their Christmas by taking all of their presents. After Seuss's death, a 2000 live-action feature film adaptation was produced. Directed by Ron Howard, it featured Jim Carrey in the titular role.
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Thursday
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Saturday
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S 5 : Ep 15
Aired 12/25/12
S 5 : Ep 14
Aired 12/18/12
S 5 : Ep 13
Aired 12/11/12
S 5 : Ep 12
Aired 12/4/12
User Score: 1986
User Score: 126
User Score: 108
User Score: 78
User Score: 64
User Score: 50
User Score: 37
User Score: 37
User Score: 31
User Score: 31