Lie To Me

Gillian: I thought you could use a real drink. Cal: And a bath. Gillian: Well, I can't help you with that.

Torres: She loves you, and your money. You're lying to yourself if you think you can separate the two. Mr. Kachini: She lied to me. Loker: Well, why are you in love with Nadia? She's charming, she's intelligent and... oh, wait for it... she's beautiful. How's her beauty any different from your money? Mr. Kachini: I don't know. Torres: Exactly. Just be honest with her. Loker: And yourself. And get a prenup.

(Gillian hangs up her phone and looks upset) Cal: How's your husband? Gillian: How'd you know...? Don't do that.

Loker: Look, I don't care if she's into him for his money, as long as she's up front about it from the beginning. Torres: Yeah, well, it's not always so easy to be open about money. Loker: I always tell women exactly how much I have in the bank on the first date. Sylvia: And you wonder why you never get a second.

Loker: The female hanging fly. Torres: What? Loker: The female hanging fly. She'll only mate with a male when he brings her a caterpillar as a food offering. The bigger the offering, the more time she will have intercourse with him. For insects it's food, for us it's money. She's a female hanging fly. Torres: Okay, you need to get out more.

Gillian: You almost didn't sell it. I'm going to have to hit you harder next time. Cal: You know, you take a little bit too much pleasure in that one.

(Talking to a potential client) Torres: Dr. Lightman does deception detection for the FBI, TSA, police... We don't snoop into people's personal lives. Loker: But thanks for coming in. Your Website is incredibly useful for reconnecting with girls who rejected me in middle school.

Mr. Kachini: I'm about to ask my girlfriend, Nadia, to marry me. Loker: Oh, mazel tov. It's a good thing you're starting young, it took my dad five times to get it right. Affair, alcohol, green card problems, affair...

Ria: Did you find Dr. Lightman? Gillian: FEMA confirmed he's at the disaster site. I'm heading out there now while there are still one or two people he hasn't had time to alienate. Ria: Better drive fast.

Cal: What was that, a job? Gillian: Yeah. Cal: You wanna tell me what it is? Gillian: I don't need your permission to take on a case. Cal: Well, that depends on the case, doesn't it, really? Gillian: It'll be fine, I promise. Cal: That usually means I'm gettin' screwed. Gillian: Usually.