Little House on the Prairie

(Grace and Mr. Edwards are having a drink of water out of his jug, which looks like a whiskey canister, when Mr. Hanson approaches) Grace: Mr. Hanson! (wipes her mouth and returns the jug to Mr. Edwards) Well, I better get back to work! Lars Hanson: I never knew her to drink. Mr. Edwards: Well, you know, it's always them quiet ones. Lars Hanson: Ya.

Man: (when Charles walks toward a drunken Mr. Edwards) Grab a chair. He's crazy! Charles: Edwards? (Mr. Edwards goes to punch him, Charles grabs him) Edwards, it's me, Ingalls! Mr. Edwards: Ingalls? Charles: Ingalls. Mr. Edwards: Ingalls. My only friend.

Mr. Edwards: (about Grace) She's a God-fearing woman, and I'm not. It's as simple as that. Oh, I'm not saying there's no God. I'm just saying he ain't never got no time for me, so I ain't got no time for him. Caroline: Don't you believe in anything? Mr. Edwards: Yes, ma'am. I believe in me. But that's not enough for Widow Snider. Caroline: Is it enough for you? Mr. Edwards: You tell me something, ma'am. Tell me why God let my wife and daughter die. (long silence, Caroline says nothing) Well, I'll be gone before you get back from Church tomorrow. I hate good-byes, so it's better all around if I'm just gone. Caroline: Mr. Edwards, do you understand what you're doing? You're punishing God! And if you go on punishing him for what happened in the past, you're not going to have any room for the future. I'd feel so sorry if you did that.

Charles: What did you girls learn in Sunday School today? Mary: Susan Zigler passed a note to Freddy Hopkins, and it made Amanda Butterfield jealous! Charles: I meant about religion.

Caroline: Mr. Edwards, since you work right across from the post office, I was wondering if you would mind stopping by and picking up our mail before closing time. Mr. Edwards: Oh, I'd be glad to. Laura: But that's our job! Mary: We always do that! Caroline: Hush now. Sometimes the freight wagons are late, or it comes after the girls have already started home, and then we don't get our mail until the next day. Mr. Edwards: Oh, I'd be glad to do that, no trouble at all. Caroline: Thank you. Mr. Edwards: Come along now, girls, we don't want to be late. (they leave) Charles: You know, Caroline, that was really a very good idea. I mean, it wouldn't do to have those letters accumulate the way they've been pouring in one or two a month.

Mary: You're gonna be all right. Caroline: Sure, she is. It's just a flareup with your old tonsils. Laura: Is Doctor Baker gonna operate on me? Caroline: He might take them out, but not while they're infected. Not until you're all better. Laura: Then I don't know which to wish for: getting better, or staying like this.

Charles: (about Isaiah and Grace) I can't think of two people who are more different. Caroline: Everybody knows opposites attract. Charles: I always wondered why you went for a shy, sophisticated, educated man like myself. LONG PAUSE Caroline: Charles, what did you say? Charles: (kisses her, turns out the light) I said good night, dear.

Caroline: Mr. Edwards! What a wonderful surprise! Mr. Edwards: Yeah, well, you know me, like a bad penny, always showing up.