Regine: You know what Khadijah, this kinda reminds me when we were little. And they would take a busload of us "inner-city kids" out for a trip into the country, to show us what farm life was really like. We would feed pigs, and ride horses, and milk cows. Stank like hell.
(Max swerves the car while driving)
Regine: You okay? You want me to drive?
Max: No I'm fine. Why?
Regine: Oh, I don't know. The sparks off the guardrail were a little distracting.
Khadijah: Can I take this thing off? I'm about to lose it y'all.
Regine: Khadijah it's not the blindfold that making you sick. It's Max's driving.
Max: Yeah, well why don't you drive. (Max let's go of the steering wheel and puts her hand in the air)
(Regine and Synclaire starts screaming and panicking) Didn't think so.
Regine: Max does your car always ride this bumpy?
Max: That's all your designer luggage in the back.
Regine: My luggage isn't that heavy.
Synclaire: Well something's weighing this car down.
Khadijah: Y'all better not be looking at me.
Khadijah: Synlaire it's only three birthdays that matter. When you're 16, you're sweet. When you're 21, you're legal. And when you're 65, you get to eat at Denny's half-price. Now in between, you chill.
Kyle: I don't know man. I had one of my best shirts ruined by frosting. Yeah I was at this bachelor party right. And there was this big cake. And all of a sudden this volumenously large breasted woman pops out. Bam! No, no, no. Bam! Ping, ping bam! And she started to gyrating man and icing was flying all over like... (Kyle looks over at the girls who are looking at him with disbelief and disgust) This really isn't a girl's story is it?
Overton: Well you got my attention.
Regine: Let's just listen to the radio.
Max (Slaps her hand): Don't touch that dial. I don't listen to music while I'm driving.
Regine: Well, then why have a radio?
Max: There are those occasions when I do listen to music in the car. But not while I'm driving.
Khadijah; Somebody better look up at the roof for footprints.
Khadijah: But I didn't even pack a bag.
Syclaire: Don't you worry, I packed one for you, and I'm not even gonna ask what that was in your sock drawer.
Regine: So did ya'll do anything special for Khadijah's birthday down at the office?
Syclaire: Yeah. We got her a stripper. But she didn't seem to enjoy it too much.
Regine: Because it's a reminder of what she hasn't had in a while.
Regine: Atlantic City. Happy birthday, girl.
Khadijah: My birthday and Max's favortie place, huh?
Max: It is, isn't it?
Regine: Max, I thought this was supposed to be a junior suite.
Max: Ooh. Look who's getting picky about where she sleeps.
Syclaire: Are you feeling any better?
Khadijah: I just need to lie still for a while. (Lays down on the water bed) Oh, yeah. Much better.
Max: Khadijah, you're my dear friend and it's your birthday and you're sick and I know it's wrong for me to feel this way but---
Khadijah: Max, go gamble.
Max: Thank you.
(Syclaire lays down on the bed)
Khadijah: What are you doin'?
Syclaire: Putting on my makeup. Why else do you think there's a mirror up there? To watch yourself sleep?
Synclaire: When I was little, my family used to take long car trips to our cabin in Wisconsin. And all I can remember is my parents getting mad at me 'cause I had to go to the bathroom every twenty minutes. It got to the point where I was scared to say anything.
Khadijah: You have to go now, don't you?
Khadijah: The next time I say I don't wanna celebrate my birthday, I don't wanna celebrate my birthday.
Max: Khadijah, we're sorry.
Khadijah: No need. See, y'all got birthdays coming up, and Khadijah never forgets.
Regine: Turn the lights on so the roaches don't move in.
(Kyle looks at Max)
Kyle: Too late.
Regine: It turns out that when you get drunk and lose a lot of money, you get loud.
Syclaire: Very, very.
Khadijah: Oh man this is the worst day of my life, I am never going back to that place.
Max: Oh, I don't think you're gonna have that problem. We were thrown out.
Khadijah: What? I can't believe this. The dream seemed so real.
Synclaire: I did meet Flip Wilson though, didn't I?