Max: You were worried about me?
Kyle: Well, you do owe me six dollars.
Regine: Khadijah, your little friend's been holed up in the bathroom for 45 minutes, chatting on the phone about Coolio.
Synclaire: I'd never have sex with a man just because he offered me a million dollars.
Regine: Girl, this is 'Crimson Tide'!
Max: All right! You've done it now. The truth is...I'm a virgin.
Jackson: Ever been out with a guy who just got out of prison?
Max: Uh-huh. Let's go.
Synclaire: Anybody who loves bunnies enough to punch out six cops is not a violent man.
Overton: What exactly are we looking for, girl?
Max: I don't know.
Overton: Well, then it's a good plan.
Jackson: He won't die if we get him to the clinic right away.
Kyle: Well, tell that to the spiders maybe they'll go out and warm up the car for you.
Overton: Dude, got some nice stuff up in through here. 200 power micro scope. High resolution camera. (Sees the spiders) Big hairy ass spiders!
Max: Why? Why do I keep picking all the wrong men? First Kyle. Now a killer. What's next, Kyle again?
Max: There is nothing more exasperating than preparing a murder case.
Overton: Ever try to fire up a barbecue in the middle of a light drizzle with everybody standing around talking about, 'Where's my hot link?'
Regine: Hold up. Conservative suit. Zero cleavage factor. You're dropping that tired brother Teddy tonight, huh?
Khadijah: I'll give you a 7.2 on the all-up-in-my-business scale.
Jackson: When they told me my lawyer was somebody named Max Shaw, I expected a good deal more testosterone.
Max: Get to know me.
Giancarlo Esposito and Queen Latifah would later star in the movie "Last Holiday" together.
Khadijah advises Marissa, "Don't take it personal." This is a reference to Monica's 1995 hit single, "Don't Take It Personal (Just One of Dem Days)."
The episode's title is a spin on the 1985 movie and later a broadway show, Kiss of the Spider Woman.