MacGyver

Jimmy: Take my advice, stay young. MacGyver: I'll try.

MacGyver: (Climbing up an elevator shaft) I've never minded checking out bars or car lots. That's because they're usually not ten stories up.

Jimmy: I lived by the beach when I was a kid in Jersey City. Well, it really wasn't a beach, it was a drainage ditch. But my mother said it was a beach and I believed.

Jimmy: Well, like I used to tell Mikey, dreams are important, otherwise sleep is just eight hours of nothing.

MacGyver: I like alfalfa sprouts for two reasons: lots of minerals and they don't stain your clothes.

MacGyver: If Simmons picked this neighborhood because of its low profile, he made a great choice. Everything you always wanted in a slum, and less.

MacGyver: You know, I bought your whole story. Boston Braves. Jimmy: True. MacGyver: Bad knees. Jimmy: Critical. MacGyver: Being a friend.

Jimmy: Our Ralph is so dumb, he'd study for a blood test.

Jimmy: I owe you one, MacGyver. MacGyver: How can you owe a friend?

Ballplayer: Hey, Louie, I need some oil for my glove. Jimmy: You don't need oil, you need glue. Two errors on one play yesterday. Ballplayer: I lost it in the sun! Jimmy: It was a ground ball!

Pete: Mmm, this is great. Did you make this? MacGyver: You're supposed to heat it. Pete: Mmm, I like it cold. MacGyver: I didn't think you'd go in for whipped bean curd. (Pete looks in disgust)

MacGyver: Electrical locks are designed to open when a person inside hits a button. Nice thing about these kinds of locks is that if you give 'em a power surge, they don't know which side of the door you're on.

MacGyver: The penalty box is hockey's version of solitary confinement. Except you serve your time in front of a rink full of people.

MacGyver: When I was a kid, I was known as a rink rat. The first one on the ice and the last one off it. So as a bonus for my last assignment, I asked Pete Thornton to arrange a scrimmage with the Squires. I was kind of nervous lacing up my skates, but once I was out there it was just like old times.