Malcolm in the Middle

Season 7 Episode 20

Cattle Court

Aired Sunday 8:30 PM Apr 16, 2006 on FOX
out of 10
User Rating
62 votes

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Episode Summary

Cattle Court
Reese meets a cute vegetarian named Carrie and pretends that he shares the same interest. When she finds out he was lying Reese starts to feel guilty about his love of meat. After playing a game with Dewey, Hal sees that it teaches nothing about the real world so he creates his own game. Malcolm is grounded on the weekend but still has a plan to go to a rock concert. After Lois gives her shift on the night of the concert away to Craig so she can be home, Malcolm tries to convince him to give it back, by telling him to not be a pushover. Graig takes the advice to heart and makes a decision that could ruin his life.moreless

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  • superb

    Reese falls in love with a vegetarian, and to keep her interested, he lies and says he is a vegetarian also. But she finds out the truth and dumps him. Can he win her back?

    Dewey and Hal play a game, but Hal does not like that the game does not teach real life lessons, so he makes his own game.

    Malcolm is grounded but wants to go to a concert, and all is good, until Lois gets Craig to take the shift she was going to work on the night Malcolm was going to sneak out.

    Good episode. The ending was funny, Craig was funny throughout, and Reese's dream of himself in court was pretty funny. B+ episode, I thinkmoreless
  • Pork is great.

    I have to say that I really liked this episode of Malcolm in the middle. It was solid and it made me chuckle from time to time. It was basically an episode that had good writing, funny comedy, a good plot and some good acting. Lois looks like she is beyond her years with the way she dresses. She is trying to be young and every viewer know she looks WAY past her prime. Getting back to the show, it was funny to see Reese be a moron and for him to try to fool a girl that was smarter than he is. Thank you.moreless
  • Good!

    Malcolm wants to sneak out on Friday while Lois is working, but when she asks Craig to take her shift, he agrees. Malcolm tries to get Craig mad at Lois so he won't work for her. Reese meets a vegetarian and pretends to be one, but it doesn't work as she finds meat on him. He saves the cows at his job to show he cares about her. Hal makes Dewey play a life game to show that life isn't that successful. He gets too caught up in it.

    This episode was pretty good! I recognized Tara Lapinski. I didn't like Craig at all though. This episode gets an 8.5!moreless
  • Yet again the schemes of both Malcolm and Reese go awry.

    As always an extremely funny episode. Reese's attempt to have his cake and eat it predictably backfires. His attempt at redemption, like a Shakespearean play is written in the stars to end in tragedy. Poor Craig - no matter what he does, he will always get trodden all over (metaphorically and in this case literally)! Malcolm's conscience yet again prevents him from enjoying himself at the expense of an innocent. This is a trait that has persisted with Malcolm and endears him to the public. It means that he is not begrudged any success that comes his way because the audience can rest easy that he will eventually do the right thing - even if he does descend down the dark path for a little while!!

    I cant believe the era of Malcolm in the Middle is coming to an end. Its been a pleasure watching this series over the last 7 seasons.moreless
  • Great performance by craig, Malcolm, and Reese.

    Very funny cold opening, when Dewey has a ratin his hand Lois tells him to get rid of it, Dewy agrees and goes in his room and drops it in his drawer. All you can hear is the rat screaming

    and roaring. Reese brought dinner which are parts of the animal you can't serve people. Reese goes to school with a bloody bag of meat.

    Reese meets an attractive vegetarian

    girl named Carrie. Reese plays along with her political, vegetarian talk, at first. Reese goes on a picnic with her, but he stapled bacon to the top of his hat, taped a pork chop to his leg. Great scene when the dogs are trying to get the pork chops out of Reese, and Reese is telling the animal that everyone hates them. While this is going on, Malcolm was manipulating Craig to go to a concert, Malcolm told Craig that he does'nt have to take Lois's shift. Malcolm ends up desroying Craig. Great episode.moreless

Trivia, Notes, Quotes and Allusions


  • TRIVIA (5)

    • This is the third time someone is saved by an animal(s) that is associated with Reese. Here, Craig was knocked down by a herd of cows (which were freed by Reese) just when he was about to make the biggest mistake of his life. The first is from Season 4-1 "Zoo," where Malcolm and Dewey were saved from being eaten by tigers when Reese threw the goat he was fighting with into the tigers' den. The next was Season 6-20 "Stilts," where Reese got too wasted from taking too many pills and stole a horse. It saved Malcolm from being beaten up by a former Lucky Aide employee.

    • This episode draws a conclusion to the long-running storyline of Craig's lovesickness towards Lois.

    • This is the final episode we get to see the Lucky Aide with Malcolm, Lois, and Craig working there.

    • Lois is still driving the old van, even though she won a new truck in the previous episode, "Bomb Shelter."

    • In this episode, Reese is back at his meatpacking job. However, in the previous episode, he becomes a telemarketer.

  • QUOTES (19)

    • Hal: What kind of lesson is this stupid game teaching you? Where is the card that says hemorrhoids are not covered by your health plan?

    • Reese: You can't honestly tell me those animals were innocent! They were sent to the slaughterhouse for a reason.

    • (after having nightmare)
      Lois: Reese, I made some sausage for you.
      (Reese runs away screaming horrified)
      Lois: (concerned) Reese, what on earth is wrong?

    • Lois: Dig in, everybody! (puts a platter of steaming disturbing meat in front of Hal)
      Hal: What kind of meat is that?
      Reese: Don't knock it! This is the stuff that keeps the cow from falling apart. (takes some of the meat while Jamie covers his eyes)

    • Hal: So, what's new and exciting down at the old meat packing plant?
      Reese: Tons! They have me back on the floor where all the action is. And they upgraded to the new Slaughter Bot! Now it has six chainsaw arms and it doesn't get jammed in the horns anymore!
      Hal: ...uh-huh.
      Dewey: And you people wonder why I wake up screaming all the time.

    • Cow Judge: I've heard enough! You make me sick to my stomachs. I say he's guilty! How does the jury find?
      Sheep Jury: (all of them with sheep voices) Guilty!
      Reese: That's not fair! They're just following you like sheep!
      Cow Judge: You have been found guilty by a jury of your food. I sentence you to be lightly seared and served with a cajun peppercorn sauce.
      (Reese screams as the cattle is after him, then wakes up from his dream)

    • Pig Prosecutor: Your Honor, I'd like to present some evidence. I warn you, these photographs are extremely graphic.
      (a chicken turns on a projector presenting a slide show, the first picture is a plate full of eggs, sausage, and bacon, all the animals get shocked)
      Reese: What?! That's just my breakfast.
      (the same chicken changes slides, showing two pictures of Reese putting meat in the oven and then carving it on two other shots)
      Reese: Is anyone else getting hungry?

    • Malcolm: (to the camera) Okay, so I lied and destroyed a man so I can go to a concert. I'll get him a t-shirt.

    • Lois: Craig, what do you want from me?
      Craig: I want more!
      Lois: I'm sorry, I can't give you more. You know that.
      Craig: There's got to be something. There's got to be some scenario where you could see us together, please, anything!
      Lois: (pauses while she thinks) Okay, this is the only universe this could possibly exist in. (takes a deep breath) I'm 90 years old. Hal is dead. I have dementia and I need someone to keep me from catching myself on fire. There's no money for a nurse, the kids won't do it, and I'm asleep 22 hours a day. Then, and only then, maybe could we be together.
      Craig: (pauses then begins to sob happily) It's like you're reading straight out of my diary.
      (Lois sighs)

    • Reese: You know I can't go too long without meat.

    • (in Reese's dream)
      Pig Prosecutor: Your Honor, the defendant is charged with 63,428 counts of murder.
      Reese: What?!
      Pig Prosecutor: Each count is by the slice.
      Resse: It's not my fault you're all so delicious. (whispering to his lawyer) This isn't fair. Say something.
      Chicken Laywer: *buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk, buk*
      Reese: That's not what you said in the hallway!!

    • Malcolm: You're going to show her Craig Feldspar can't be pushed around.
      Craig: Thank you, Malcolm, for opening my eyes. You've awoken a sleeping giant and he's very cranky.

    • Hal (reading a small piece of paper): "This coupon entitles you to one free game night with dad."
      Dewey: Let's go.
      Hal: Dewey, I wrote this in a blind panic in the hall closet while everyone was singing to you "Happy Birthday." You're not gonna hold me to this, are you? (pauses) Does it have an expiration date?
      Dewey: Nope.

    • Malcolm (to the screen): I am so happy. I'm sneaking out to a concert Friday night while Mom works the late shift. The band sucks, but I have backstage passes. And if that's even one billionth as insane as I've always imagined it, I could die happy.

    • Hal: What kind of meat is this?
      Reese: Don't knock it. This the stuff that keeps the cow from falling apart.

    • Lois: (about Craig) You ruined his life so you could go see some band?! Are you that selfish?
      Malcolm: Apparently, because there's a part of me hoping you'll still let me go.
      (Lois glares at him)
      Malcolm: Okay, that part's gone.

    • Malcolm: For once in your life, Craig, be a man!
      Craig: (about Lois) I hate her! (runs off crying)

    • Craig: (to Malcolm, as he watches Lois from afar) Patience, my friend. My trap is about to spring.
      Lois: This stupid pen doesn't work.
      Craig: (to Malcolm) I was up all night scribbling with it. Watch her face as her whole world comes crumbling down. (laughs)
      (Lois grabs another pen to use)
      Craig: Okay, I didn't see that coming, but who would?

    • Craig: I'm sorry, ma'am, I can't sell you that box. It's damaged.
      Customer: I don't see any damage.
      (Craig squeezes box)

  • NOTES (3)


    • Reese: Earn this.

      Reese says, "earn this" to a calf just as he sets a heard of cattle free from a slaughterhouse. This two word line is the same Tom Hanks's character says to Matt Damon's character in Saving Private Ryan.