As a female, I am the FIRST one to say, guys especially those w/demanding career, be sure to communicate and work with the wifeY on tours, work dates, etc.
This note is in reference to the phone call you received in Italy for the show you wanted. I think it's MORE than great how you DO talk to your wife about these things, but, I have to say, you come across SCARED as to what her reaction will be. You are soooo (overlY - I would say) concerned with her response(s) to the point that you are really coddling her.
It appears she's been "coddled" all her life. I remember hearing from the father that she was a little slow in school, etc., and I got from that and other comments, as well as the way her sister tries to help her all the time, that she really hasn't had to make too many decisions by herself. AND, any that WERE made concerning her - CODDLED her...
If you have to feel as though you are 'afraid' of her response to things that come up concerning your career, than, perhaps she may need to get work - - because eventually, your cancellations, and/or inability to attend these appointments (such as the one u missed while in Italy) WILL - effect your career.
Your brothers "seem" irritated with you and I don't know if they see what I'm saying, but, again, this type of "enablement" is NOTTTTT helping her... it's re-instituting the coy, helpless, and fragile person that she is/appears to be, i.e. even her parents are concerned...
She is STRONG when she REALLY REALLY needs to get something across, so, you all/both need to work together - to work on THAT aspect of HER personality, i.e. the STRONG point!
She is a very sweet girl. At times sooo sweet, "I" even fear for her!!! LOL... I think she is precious but so close to breakable and you all REALLY need to get some intervention, because if YOU, Mr. Jonas, do this on your "own", ------> mark my words, her family will come down on YOU! YOU will be the bad guy, and you are far from that. I can't BELIEVE how much you try to make her happy.
Truth is..... no one can make another happy. Working together with a therapist will help you both learn to deal with the stardom, the demand stardom places on your lives, as well as "both" sides dealing with your personalities... Mr. Jonas, you want to please her soooo much, I do fear for YOU - - as well... not to mention your career. There are things you have wanted for a long long time. I would hate to see you make decisions based on her weaknesses so you can "be happy". This will NOT work in the long term.
Well, I hope I made sense to you and got my points across. To sum it up, I really love you both, you're both sweet, loving, precious people. I am a Christian also. I have been through a lot. Personality wise, I have gone through similar situations (feeling wise, I'm not a celebrity LOL)... I have had a life of INCONTROLLABLE and HORRIBLE ANXIETY... as well as depression, and, and, and LOL... But, I had to stop enabling my anxieties. I had to PUSH THRU - it made me stronger.
So, in conclusion, I wish you both the best. Hope what I said helps.... bless u both!!!!
PS - the counseling does NOT have to be on TV, part of your show, it can be done personally between the 2 of you, you all have to figure that one out LOL....