Married... With Children

Season 4 Episode 2

Dead Men Don't Do Aerobics

2
Aired Sunday 8:00 PM Sep 10, 1989 on FOX
9.2
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Episode Summary

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Peggy wins a two-week, in-home workout with Chicago's Healthiest Man, Jim Jupiter. Unfortunately for Jim, Peggy's willpower proves to be much stronger than his.

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    Trivia, Notes, Quotes and Allusions

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    • TRIVIA (1)

      • The episode ends with the following dedication: "This show is dedicated to our brother the cockroach. Let him show us the way."

    • QUOTES (8)

      • Al: so Peg, lets all follow the example of our friend, the cockroach. They were here before men, they'll be here after man. You know why? They eat crap.

      • Peggy: Ok family. Home cooking.
        Kelly: What is it tonight, mom? Bee spit?
        Peggy: Sunflower paste.
        Bud: Hm. I'm gonna spread mine on styrofoam.

      • Al: Now Peg, as you know, I am the man. And a man's home is his coffin.
        Peggy: Don't you understand? I just want what every married woman wants. Someone besides her husband to live with. I mean, what do you think I'm going to to with him? Lick him up and down? Nuzzle my head against his rippling, heaving chest? Plant little angel kisses all over his glistening...
        Al: Ok, so it's innocent. But I still don't see what you need him for. You wanna bend? Dust. You wanna reach? Sweep. You want sex? Just let me know when you're finished and I come home.

      • Peggy: Al, meet Jim.
        Jim: I'm Jim Jupiter, the healthiest man in Chicago.
        Al: Then you should heal quick when I pull your spine through your mouth.

      • Bud: (to Jim) How do I gain upper body strength.
        Kelly: Wear weights on your arms when you squeeze your pimples?

      • Peggy: I can't believe it. I get to watch Jim Jupiter flex and ripple in the privacy of my own home.
        Bud: Mom, do I really have to share a room with Kelly while that exercise guy is here. I mean I'm gonna be up all night with all those guys babbling 'Hurry up, I got to get back to the ship'.
        Peggy: Now kids, would you just forget about your empty little lives and think about mine. Jim Jupiter will be here any minute. Now, how do I look?
        Kelly: Hot.
        Bud: Desperate.
        Peggy: Good. I din't want to send any mixed signals.

      • (Al is reading from a newspaper about Jim Jupiter's death)
        Al: "Jim Jupiter dies on-air on his show." Blah, blah, blah... "county coroner gave his report on Jim's death. Blood sugar level: enough to kill three horses. Cholesterol level: high enough to dam the mighty Mississippi."
        Peggy: This is all my fault, Al. I killed the healthiest man in Chicago.
        Al: So? You've slowly been killing me for years and you don't seem to care.

      • Peg: There are two things Peggy Bundy doesn't do, number one: cook, clean, sew, vacuum, iron and parent, and number two: exercise.

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