Biff: Hey look it's Santa's Village Idiot. What are you doing here?
Al: I have to use the bathroom punk.
Hal: Don't they have one on the train? Toot-toot.
Al: Oh sure, you guys think you're funny don't you. Well let me tell you something, you're looking at your futures.
Biff: I don't think so elf boy. This is just a-
Al: Temporary job?
Hal: Yeah, because we're going to go to-
Al: College? You gotta girlfriend? I'll bet it's a redhead.
Hal: How did you know that?
Al: Lucky guess. Congratulations boys, you've peaked. You're gonna slave away here day in, day out, year in, year out. Until one day you'll be close to 50. And you'll be an elf! Driving a choo-choo! Ha ha ha!
Customer: I can't believe these don't come in a lower heel.
Hal: Oh they will. Just stand up on them.
Gary: These two kids have done more work in the last three days than you've done in 25 years.
Al: But I paced myself!
Marcy: I just came by to tell you that this year I am finally going to win the neighborhood decorating contest.
Al: What, are you going to stand out front and be The Little Drummer Boy?
Marcy: No, Stench Who Stole Christmas.
Peg: Now that's some Christmas spirit. You know, maybe we oughta have some traditions around here.
Al: Well, Peg, like Christmas dinner?
Peg: Oh, nah. That's been done to death. You know, I saw a gingerbread house on Oprah today. Maybe I oughta make one of those.
Bud: (to Al) Does she know that would require baking?
Al: Not to mention standing up.
Peg: I'll show you guys. I'm going in this kitchen right now and I'm gonna start baking! (arrives at the kitchen and looks around) Alright, now tell me which one of these things is the oven.
Al: We've got two young eager boys hanging around us, you know what that makes us?
Griff: Michael Jackson?
The episode title is an allusion to the Christmas carol, God Rest You Merry, Gentleman.