Married... With Children

Season 5 Episode 12

Married ... with Who

Aired Sunday 8:00 PM Jan 06, 1991 on FOX
out of 10
User Rating
63 votes

By Users

Episode Summary

Marcy wakes up from a drunken stupor to find she's married a one-night-stand who she later discovers is a convicted real estate swindler named Jefferson D'arcy. She compounds her misery when she offers Al and Peg $2,000 to plan and host her formal wedding ceremony.

Who was the Episode MVP ?

  • Introducing Jefferson

    The Steve era is officially over as Jefferson gets onboard with Marcy. I like Jefferson but lets be honest, this was the beginning of the end of the funny for my favorite show in Tv history. I watched each episode over 15 times. This one was good and an interesting little fact. This is the only episode where all uses the name JEFF. Every show after this one he uses his full name Jefferson. Watch the series and you will see that also.moreless

Trivia, Notes, Quotes and Allusions


  • TRIVIA (1)

    • Al 1st mentioned owning property at Lake Chikomicomico in episode 1x11 'Nightmare on Al's Street'.
      In this episode we discover it was a scam and Jefferson was involved.

  • QUOTES (9)

    • Peg: (on Marcy's mystery man) Now Marcy, this is serious. I need you to strap in and concentrate. Was he any good?
      Marcy: I don't know. I didn't even see his face!
      Peg and Kelly: (excited) All right!

    • Marcy: (to Peg) I just really can't believe I'm now Mrs... (to Jefferson) Darling, what's your last name?
      Jefferson: D'Arcy.
      (cheers and applause from the audience)
      Marcy: (in disbelief) Marcy D'Arcy? I'm now Marcy D'Arcy? What have I done?

    • Marcy: Peggy, I'm worried. I don't know my husband!
      Peg: Who does and who wants to? Face it Marcy, the average man-woman relationship is tops 3 weeks of happiness. You know, it's the happiness you feel when he turns away from you to burp rather than turning towards you and saying "pull my finger." It's when he at least tries to hit the toilet. And when during sex, you're not lying there wondering "what the hell is he doing?" You know, you're lucky. Your 3 weeks of happiness are ahead of you. Who cares who she is? Look at him. He's gorgeous. I say saddle up, ride, and if he breaks a leg, shoot him.

    • Al: (To Kelly and Bud) Well, see kids. It was a dream. You were replaced by two six-packs in the refrigerator.
      Kelly: Well, weren't we cold?
      Bud: (To Kelly) I was. You were empty.

    • Al: (Gives advice to Jefferson) Run hard, run now, run silent, run deep. Run, like Mexican water through a first-time tourist. But the key word here is "Run".
      Jefferson: (Refers to Marcy) Isn't she cute?
      Al: (Repeats) Run.

    • Jefferson: I saw a woman come over here. Are one of you my wife? (Notices a distressed Marcy, a pleased Peggy, a bored Kelly and decides for Kelly) Come on sweetheart, let's go back to bed. (Takes Kelly on her hand)
      Kelly: Bye, Daddy.
      Peggy: No, no, no, no. You've made a mistake, I'm your wife. (Releases Kelly and takes Jefferson's hand) Now we can go back to bed.
      Marcy: Oh shut up. It's me, it's me.

    • Peggy: Al, we're talking about sex. Leave it to those who do it.

    • Marcy: (Distressed) All I know is I woke up this morning with a man in my bed. I don't even know who he is.
      Al: Well, that's easy, he slept with you, he's the stupidest man on earth.

    • Peggy: (Reads test-questions from some magazine, to Al) Who would you rather spend the night with? A, your wife, or B…
      Al: (Interrupts his wife) B!

  • NOTES (2)