Kelly: Hey no-life. I need a favor. I want you to help me get this guy.
Bud: What's wrong? The breakaway blouse isn't working?
Kelly: Hey, I'm asking nice, you little eunuch. Anyway, I have an idea. I checked up on this guy and I know he is not doing too good in english.
Bud: 'Well', Kelly.
Kelly: Well what?
Bud: Okay. So he ain't done no good in english.
Kelly: Mom, you got to help me. What did you do in school to get guys?
Al: Same thing she does now to chase them away.
Peggy: All right, Al. It's time to do your chores.
Al: Wait a second, Peg. We just had sex three nights ago. I'm still kind of woozy.
Peggy: I'm asking you to take out the garbage, Al. The longer of the two jobs.
Al: And the more rewarding.
(Al picks up the plastic garbage bag and it breaks, spilling garbage all over the floor)
Peggy: Don't you even know how to do that?
Al: Thanks, Peg. Now it's exactly like sex.
Kelly: Give me a 'P'. Give me an 'O'. Give me a 'K'. Give me an 'E'. Poke High! Yeah!
Mr. Groggs: Very good. But it's P-O-L-K. Polk High. Named after President James K. Polk.
Marcy: (thinking) So young... so young. Hey, number 21, if you got the place, I'll do the time. Oh, yeah.
Marcy: (thinking) Look at those young boys... those tight little buns squeezed into those tight little uniforms... spike me, baby, spike me.
Kelly: I'm Kelly. Remember, we met in the boys' shower the other day?
Matt: Oh, yeah, the soup girl.
Kelly: The soap girl. S-O-P-E.
The writer must have had an odd sense of dark humor, as the opponent's team name is "Aryans", their quarterback's name rhymes with "Rommel" and the wide receiver's name rhymes with "Hitler".
When Bud is quizzing Matt about the book, Of Mice and Men, Matt correctly names the "big one" as Lenny but says the "little one" was Squiggy. Lenny and Squiggy are two characters in the telvision sitcom, Laverne & Shirley.
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