M*A*S*H

Season 4 Episode 16

Dear Ma

4
Aired Unknown Dec 23, 1975 on CBS

Episode Recap

Radar is sitting next to his bed writing a letter to his mother back home telling her about what has been happening in camp. He says that he was assisting Hawkeye in inspecting the feet of everyone in camp. Hawkeye gave Col. Potter 100%, and he says he learned about foot care from President Truman when he was just a captain. Radar tells his mother that the colonel is like his father may have been if he hadn't died. Then he tells her about when he was helping Klinger loading patients onto a bus to be shipped out. BJ talked to a patient of his, Sgt. Callen. The sergeant says that his wife needs an operation and he needs money for it, so he talks BJ into buying a watch that he says cost $150 for $20. After the bus leaves, Hawkeye tells him it was a scam and BJ finds out that the watch has no inner workings. After he examines BJ's feet, Hawkeye goes to Margaret's tent for the foot inspection. When he and Radar knock on her door, they hear rustling and shuffling inside. Radar peeks in and sees her with Frank. After a bit, she lets them in and Frank says he was just leaving. However, Hawkeye points out his boot is tied to the leg of the table; Frank doesn't believe it until he starts to leave. He then says he only came in for a manual. Hawkeye examines Margaret's feet and finds only a bit of fungus, two bunions and a corn. After they leave, Margaret finds out that she has buttoned her shirt wrong. Radar then goes to the mess tent for a cup of coffee, and writes to his mother that he found a North Korean soldier getting food. He sees the Russian rifle the soldier has and thinks it is a souvenir, but the Korean runs off. Then Radar realizes what happened, but runs into Frank with his tray full of food. Then Radar tells about when Col. Potter and Margaret went into a local village to treat the locals. Potter tells Radar to keep the white paint away from Frank, because he would paint the rocks. After he leaves, Radar takes the paint away from Frank, who evades a foot inspection from Hawkeye. Radar then takes a call from Mrs. Potter, who says that she has a premonition that something bad would happen to the colonel. Later, a pair of South Koreans attached to the Army enter the mess tent, but Frank, remembering the North Korean earlier, attacks them. When Frank apologizes, one of them turns his wrist over. Back at the letter, Radar tells his mom that foot inspection is taking a long time. Hawkeye goes to Klinger's tent for his inspection, and he reads a letter that he has written to President Eisenhower, pleading him for a discharge. Frank again refuses the inspection, and Hawkeye does Father Mulcahy's. He just has a scar on a toe from a bite from his sister when they were kids. Radar tells his mother about Hawkeye: 'real smart, but kinda crazy.' He then tells her about the guinea pig he sent away for that is doing well. Then, he tells about Col. Potter getting shot in the rear end on the road. He compliments Margaret about her coolness under pressure and says his wife is the same way. BJ and Hawkeye take him to the OR and Potter says he wants to watch them at work. They set up a mirror so he can watch them remove the shrapnel from the back side, and Hawkeye waxes poetic on the human tush. Just then, Mrs. Potter calls, and Radar tells him about her premonition. He doesn't want her to know about his being shot, and BJ suggests the phone be brought into the OR. Radar tells Mrs. Potter that the Colonel's in the officer's club and the others play along. When BJ drops a bullet in a glass, Potter says that it was an olive pit. Just then, more wounded come in and Potter says that everything is going well. BJ finds that Sgt. Callen is one of his patients. Radar then tells his mother that Hawkeye finally got to do his foot inspection of Frank: he found nail polish on his toenails, which happens to be of Margaret's shade. When Frank asks for it not to be put in the report, Hawkeye writes that Frank has discoloration of the toenails due to 'combat action with a hostile manicurist.' Radar finishes his letter as Dopey, the guinea pig, eats lettuce on it.
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