M*A*S*H

Season 5 Episode 10

Hawkeye Get Your Gun

4
Aired Unknown Nov 30, 1976 on CBS

Trivia

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  • Trivia

    • Colonel Potter looks at Klinger's letter and says, "I don't read Gypsy." The actual word for the Gypsy language is Romani. Whether Klinger can actually write in this language is unclear. He may have just written a letter in gibberish and figured nobody in the camp could tell the difference.

  • Quotes

    • Klinger: It's true; now I know why the sounds of violins set my blood on fire. Why I'm so attracted to store-front windows. Why, when I smell paprika, I face toward Budapest. Why I have the urge to roam!
      Potter: Zoltan, roam the hell out of here.

    • Hawkeye: I believe my life is about to pass before my eyes.
      Potter: Let me know when it does. I love a parade.
      Hawkeye: Even short ones?

    • Potter: May I commandeer this deck for one minute?
      Igor: But, sir, look... (Shows him his cards)
      Potter: Holy cow! (The others players fold) Sorry, son.

    • (Col. Potter is painting a portrait of Hawkeye when Klinger bursts in)
      Klinger: I am Zoltan, King of the Gypsies!
      Hawkeye: You just made my day!

    • BJ: I'm so bushed I can't remember my last patient.
      Hawkeye: He had quintuplets.
      BJ: Oh, yeah.

    • Hawkeye: How long we been at this?
      Potter: I started surgery in 1932.
      Hawkeye: I mean this session.
      Potter: So do I.
      Hawkeye: Maybe we should charge them piecework.
      Potter: We can't, this is war. (yawning) By the way, which war is this?
      Hawkeye: The latest war to end all wars.

    • Hawkeye: What'd you sterilize this in, egg drop soup?
      Maj. Choi: We do the best we can, Captain, with the little we have.
      Hawkeye: Sorry, it's just that I'm opposed to germ warfare. (an explosion is heard outside) I'm not too crazy about that warfare either.

    • Hawkeye: How about a little kiss for the road?
      Margaret: Oh, don't be ridiculous!
      Hawkeye: Then how about one for me?

    • Potter: If Frank Burns makes any more patronizing cracks about my age, I'll take him behind the motor pool and let the air out of his tires.

    • (both drunk, under fire, in a foxhole))
      Potter: I said, fire that weapon!
      Hawkeye: All right. (to the gun) You're fired. (to Potter) I did it as gently as I could.
      Potter: That was an order, Pierce.
      Hawkeye: (snapping his fingers) Oh, waiter, would you take this man's order, please?
      Potter: (gently) Fire the gun, Hawkeye.
      Hawkeye: Look, Colonel, I will treat their wounds, heal their wounds, bind their wounds, but I will not inflict their wounds!
      Potter: You can't just sit there.
      Hawkeye: I may be sitting on the outside, but I'm running on the inside.
      Potter: You love life that little?
      Hawkeye: I hate guns that much!
      Potter: For God's sake, man--defend yourself! Don't think of it as a gun, think of it as a great little noisemaker--the loudest cap pistol in Korea! Shoot it and scare the living hell out of them!
      Hawkeye: Well, that--that I can do.

    • Potter: Climb in, Pierce. Where's your gun?
      Hawkeye: Sulking under my cot. We're not on speaking terms.
      Potter: Go kiss it and make up. You're taking it with you.
      Hawkeye: Colonel, if I touch that gun, I'll just trigger another argument.
      Potter: Pierce, you're taking along your sidearm!
      Hawkeye: (holding up each arm in turn) Correct, I'm taking along my right side arm and my left side arm.
      BJ: You need an enemy before you can surrender, Hawkeye. Didn't they teach you that in basic training?

  • Notes

  • Allusions

    • Hawkeye shouts "Apple Pie and Betty Grable!" to the other GIs to identify himself and Potter as Americans. Betty Grable was a popular pin-up girl and actress from the 30's-50's, and especially during WWII.

    • The title is a parody to the title of the musical "Annie Get Your Gun."

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