M*A*S*H

Season 7 Episode 5

The Billfold Syndrome

1
Aired Unknown Oct 16, 1978 on CBS

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  • Quotes

    • (After Winchester got his "telegram" that said he got the job at Massachusetts General Hospital, he's drunk and celebrating, Hawkeye, BJ, and Sidney, sit at the bar taunting him)
      Winchester: (slurred speech) Is that what you think...Beej? Is that what all you cretins think?
      Hawkeye: Did you hear something that sounded like Charles?
      BJ: The Rummy Speaks!
      Charles: Indeed he does, gentlemen. I shall rise from this tomb and leave you relics behind. Look here, I got a telegram that says I have been made chief of thorasic surgery. Gentlemen.
      BJ: Well, you got him to talk.
      Hawkeye: That's nothing, I can get him to scream. Charles, we kind of know about your news.
      Charles: You read my telegram.
      Hawkeye: Oh, we would never do that Charles. We wrote it.
      Charles: What?
      Hawkeye: You have to understand, Charles, you challenged us. We don't like to lose.
      BJ: Especially to you.
      Charles: (speech still slurred) This is one of the most, despicable, degrading...
      Hawkeye: Underhanded.
      Charles: Underhanded!
       (Charles gets up from the bar, furious with a bottle of beer as Hawkeye and BJ walk backwards toward the wall)
      Charles: You, burn for desecration. I LOATHE YOU!
      (Charles shakes up the beer bottle and sprays Hawkeye and BJ)
      Hawkeye: Good to see you back Charles, we missed you.

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