"I, Benjamin Franklin Pierce, being of sound mind and endangered body, do hereby write this to be my Last Will and Testament."
When Hawkeye is sent to an aid station to replace a killed one, he's put under heavy fire. So, as he hunkered down, he wrote a will, giving all to his father except for some things to the rest of the 4077th crew:
To Charles, his purple bathrobe, the most royal thing he knows;
To Margaret, his Groucho glasses and mustache to remind her of the funny side she shows too infrequently;
To Father Mulcahy, a nickel...and his undying respect;
To Col. Potter, his copy of "Last of the Mohicans" from his own father to one who was LIKE a father to him.;
To Klinger, his treasured Hawaiian shirt since Klinger's given him the shirt off HIS back many times;
To Erin Hunnicut (B.J.'s daughter), a list of the soldiers B.J. worked on during his tour (he couldn't think of anything to leave B.J. himself).
Fortunately, a permanent replacement arrives and Hawkeye goes home in one piece.