McHale's Navy

Season 3 Episode 10

Fountain of Youth

Aired Thursday 9:30 PM Nov 24, 1964 on ABC

Episode Recap

Carpenter reports to Captain Binghamton that Admiral 'Go-Go' Granger – 'The Boy Admiral' – Is due to arrive at Taratupa at 1400 hours (2 o'clock p.m.). It is a well-known fact that Granger is always looking for tough, youthful officers to advance in rank, so Binghamton knows he must impress Admiral Granger. He orders Carpenter to secure a boat and a crew, so that he can be out on maneuvers when Granger arrives. However, the only boat available is the 73. So, Binghamton decides that being tough enough to whip the 73 Crew into shape will impress Granger more than anything else. Binghamton grabs a Thompson and a combat helmet, and becomes 'Bing-Bing' Binghamton, and rushes out to meet McHale and Parker, who are about to shove off for their island. Binghamton informs McHale that he's assuming command of the 73, and that they will soon be shoving off on maneuvers. McHale reluctantly agrees, but, when they arrive at McHale's compound, the boys are just coming out of the jungle with a batch of homemade hooch, in coconut shells. Binghamton, of course, wants to know what they've been up to, and McHale quickly explains that they've been processing coconut oil, to use as a lubricant for their machine guns. Before Binghamton can get a taste of it, McHale suggests they board up, and head out. About an hour later, at sea, Binghamton gives the order to assault 'Dead Man's Cove', because it is on Admiral Granger's flight plan, and that, if Granger sees 'Bing-Bing' Binghamton leading the assault, he'll be quite impressed. McHale and the boys know they're in trouble, because that particular island is where they have their still set up. They go ashore, and Binghamton wants to head straight in. But, knowing that Binghamton will spot the still, McHale tries to keep him away from it, by explaining that the island may be booby trapped. But Binghamton insists, and heads in. Shortly later, a lone Japanese plane comes in for a strafing run. McHale and the boys head back for the boat, but Binghamton thinks the plane is Admiral Granger's, and waves it in. But, when the plane starts firing, Binghamton runs for cover. McHale and the boys take the 73 out, as Binghamton jumps into a trench, on top of Parker. The plane makes one more run, and the still takes several hits, and begins spilling it's contents into a nearby stream. After the plane leaves, Binghamton and Parker emerge from the trench. The stress of the attack has exhausted Binghamton, and he quickly decides that impressing Granger isn't worth the effort, and that all he needs, at the moment is a drink of water. Parker leads him to the stream, where they both drink, and immediately begin to feel the effects of the boozed-up water. Meanwhile, out on the 73, McHale and the boys are worried about Binghamton and Parker, and head back to the island. They soon find them, sitting in the stream, getting drunker by the minute. McHale and the boys know they're in trouble, so Gruber quickly whips up a cover story. He tells Binghamton that he's stumbled across 'The Fountain Of Waki Paki'. Literally translated: The Fountain Of Youth. McHale adds that, if the natives catch them partaking of their 'youth juice', they'll kill everyone. But Binghamton refuses to leave without taking some of the water with him, and orders all canteens filled with it. Once back at the base, Carpenter reports to Binghamton that Admiral Granger won't be flying in, due to an enemy aircraft presence in the area. But Binghamton orders Carpenter to get hold of Granger, and get him to come to Taratupa, so that Binghamton can reveal his secret of youth. McHale knows that they have to get back to 'Dead Man's Cove', to destroy the still, but when he tries to leave, Binghamton confines them to the main base, to keep them from stealing his 'youth water'. Later, McHale and the boys are stewing over their problem, and Parker comes along, complaining of the terrible hangover he's got, and how it makes him feel like he's '160 years old'. That gives McHale an idea, and he and the boys soon put it into action. They sneak in to Binghamton's quarters, while he's sleeping off the booze, and McHale does an elaborate makeup job on Binghamton, while he snoozes, giving him gray hair, and a long, gray beard. They quickly leave, when they hear someone coming, and Carpenter enters, shortly later. He's shocked to see Binghamton's condition, and Binghamton is even more shocked, when he sees himself in the mirror. Convinced that a shot of his 'Waki Paki' water will make him young again, Binghamton sends Carpenter to the office, to get a canteen of it. Shortly after Carpenter leaves, McHale and Gruber enter, and, after making a show of being shocked at Binghamton's condition, McHale explains that they've gotten word from the island's witch doctor, that Binghamton had been drinking water from 'The Fountain Of Kaki Daki' – The fountain of old age, and produce proof, when they bring Parker out, who has also been made up, and appears older than Binghamton. They convince Binghamton that, if they are allowed to go back to their island, they can contact the witch doctor, and have him make Binghamton young again. Meanwhile, outside the office, Virgil, Christy, Willy, and Tinker have been watching the scene through the window, and are pleased with the outcome. Just as they turn around, Admiral Granger arrives. They snap to, for Granger, and when the Admiral goes inside, Virgil climbs up, taps on the window, and warns McHale of the Admiral's arrival. McHale hustles Gruber and Parker into the next room, and, when they are safely out of sight, Binghamton heads for the door, ordering McHale to get hold of that witch doctor. Just as he opens the door, Granger steps in, much to Binghamton's surprise. When Binghamton begins ranting about the fountains of 'Waki Paki' and 'Kaki Daki', the Admiral is convinced that Binghamton has been drinking on the job. Binghamton thinks he can offer Parker as proof, but, when he brings him out, Parker has gotten out of his makeup, and is young again. As Binghamton tries to explain the situation, Carpenter hurries in with the canteen from the office, and, when Granger gets a whiff of what's in the canteen, his suspicions are confirmed.