McHale's Navy

Binghamton has just received word that Whit Barrett - The famous War Correspondent - Is due to arrive at Taratupa the following day. Binghamton: Notify all personnel… I want this base one hundred percent ship-shape! Carpenter: Yes sir. And, good luck to you, sir. Binghamton: Luck? Carpenter: Well, yes sir. Every time Mr. Barrett devotes one of his newspaper columns to a man, he seems to get promoted. Binghamton: I could care less. Carpenter: But, in the last six months, sir, it's happened three times! Binghamton: Four. Carpenter: (Thinking, as he counts) Captain Stutz... Admiral Brawley... Commander Simpson. Binghamton: You're forgetting that young hot-rodder on the PT 109. He became a full Lieutenant! (See Notes)