Season 1 Episode 2

Suspicions and Certainties

Aired Friday 8:00 PM Jan 10, 2005 on CBS



  • Trivia

  • Quotes

    • Allison: I feel like that chemist that set out to prevent heart attacks and accidentally discovered Viagra.
      Joe: That man is a fine chemist, by the way. A very fine chemist. He has nothing to be depressed about.

    • Joe: Where are you going?
      Allison: I'm going to check that your father isn't in our bed.

    • Allison: How can you say that?
      Joe: I move my lips, I push out air. There's nothing to it.

    • Allison: I'm king of the world!
      Joe: Uh, anatomically speaking, I don't think that's possible.
      Allison: I'm still king of the world.

    • Allison: (to Devalos about a possible juror) The guy who raped her hired a great attorney and got off, went on to rape three other women. Finally got caught and put away. But he's up for parole later this year and will probably get it. I mean, if I'm you, I want that lady in my lifeboat.

    • Devalos: So, what's you thesis called?
      Allison: Excuse me?
      Devalos: Everyone here thinks that you're the intern who came back to write her thesis on "Jury Selection in Capitol Trials," so…
      Allison: Well, then, it'll be "Jury Selection in Capitol Trials."
      Devalos: Catchy.

    • Joe: You had fun, I know you did.
      Allison: Hey, I love a good story.
      Joe: What are you talking about?
      Allison: Annie Sullivan and the Jesus boy. Well, you seemed to like it.
      Joe: What are you saying, she's lying?
      Allison: No. She didn't tell the story, her husband did. Look, I'm just saying that I don't think that everything necessarily happened the way we were told.

    • Joe: Psychic with a bad memory. Go figure.

    • Allison: That's a mighty heart-healthy lunch you're having there.
      Devalos: What, are you trying to tell me something? Have you had some kind of vision about my health? Uh, some premonition about my well-being?
      Allison: No. It's just something I say whenever I see a middle-aged man eating starch fried in lard.

    • Allison: Dinner with four rocket scientists and their lovely wives. Oh, joy. I can barely keep my legs together at the mere thought of it.
      Joe: That's okay. I'm not much interested in you with your legs together anyway.

    • Joe: (singing) It's a beautiful day in the neighborhood. A beautiful day for a neighbor. Would you be mine? (speaking) Hey, hot lips. It's your wake-up call.
      Allison: Go away. It's not a beautiful day. Do you not hear the death threats wafting in from the hall?
      Joe: Hey, kids! Stop threatening to kill each other. Mommy finds it depressing.
      Allison: I don't want to get up. You're right, I'm depressed.
      Joe: Do you know what depression is? It's unchanneled anger.
      Allison: Thank you. Thank you. Everything is different now.

    • Joe's Father: I'll be damned if I know what my son sees in you.
      Allison: That's okay. You already are damned.

    • Allison: I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to scream. Mommy just had a bad dream.
      Bridgette: Mommy! You gotta stop doing that! Please stop doing that.
      Joe: Yeah, Mommy. Could you maybe stop doing that?

    • Allison: Oh, my God! Something's wrong. That's not the man in my dreams.

    • Joe: Ever since you made the decision not to go to law school, to go to work for the D.A. as a consultant, I don't know, you seem kinda --
      Allison: Bitchy? Cranky? Pissed off?
      Joe: You CAN read minds.

    • Allison: I can't be wrong!
      Devalos: Sure, you can. You're a human being. The ability to be wrong is one of the membership requirements. And the willingness to admit it...well, that gets you extra points.

  • Notes

  • Allusions

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