Metalocalypse

Season 1 Episode 2

Dethwater

0
Aired Sunday 12:30 AM Aug 13, 2006 on Cartoon Network

Episode Recap

Nathan approaches a castle wearing Viking-style armor (with animal skulls of undetermined origin as shoulder pads), sitting astride a warhorse, their eyes the color of blood. He passes a forest of spikes, the heads of fallen enemies skewered upon them, and approaches the edge of a rock outcropping. The scene cuts to Skwisgaar and a young blonde woman in the throes of passion. As this is happening, Nathan lets loose a roar of hatred, his battle axe raised to the sky. Cut to Toki standing outside the castle, holding a pitchfork. Nathan looses a flaming arrow, taking Toki in the mouth and melting the flesh from his head. Nathan rides on. Next, we see Murderface digging a grave. Nathan runs up, dragging his axe along the ground, swinging out and decapitating Murderface, his head and body both falling into the open grave. Pickles stands guard at the castle gate, armor-clad and ready...however, the warhorse rears up and kicks him in the face, severing the top of his head completely in gruesome detail. Nathan kicks down a tower door and climbs the circular stairs, bursting into the uppermost room, where he finds Skwisgaar and the blonde lass. Nathan roars out, chopping Swkisgaar in half, splitting him down the middle. Cut to Nathan sitting atop a spiked throne, the nude blonde sitting at his feet (reminiscent of Conan the Destroyer and Frank Frazetta's artwork). Cut to Nathan staring at a music editor/soundboard/computer console. He stops the track that's playing, staring at the computer screen. His finger hovers over the "Delete" key. Pickles stops him, showing him news coverage of the constantly-delayed new Dethklok album. They've already spent over $500 million, and fan suicides are at a record high (a pile of dead bodies is shown outside of a random record store. One committed seppuku, and another is shown shooting himself in the head). The male reporter from the first episode is shown outside of Dethklok's castle lair, reporting that Dethklok has recorded SIXTEEN individual albums, ALL of them deleted. Nathan's constant deletions of potential albums have caused the Dow Jones' decline to record lows. Despite this (and the cries of his bandmates), Nathan AGAIN deletes the album they have just recorded. The band asks what WOULD be brutal enough, Murderface suggesting that maybe he should kill himself. Nathan makes his own suggestion - that they re-re-re-rerecord their album underwater, at the bottom of the Mariana Trench. ::Title Sequence:: Nathan explains their plans to their lawyer. Later, their lawyer calls back, saying that the record company's condition for approval of this is the introduction of a producer. Nathan doesn't take this very well... Senator Stampington stands before the video wall again, explaining the current situation to "The Group" (not an official title, just something to call them). Dethklok will be using a nuclear submarine to record their album at the bottom of the Mariana Trench. The General informs them that he has gotten in touch with the new producer, Dick "Magic Ears" Knubbler. Dick has been arrested for tax evasion, melting a co-worker's face with acid at an office party, soliciting prostitutes, and drugs. The General suggests that Dick will do anything they say in order to avoid his 25 year prison sentence. The Senator suggests getting a report from Dick once the new album is complete, but The General suggests killing them while they have the chance, making it look like an accident. The Leader (again, just a convenient name) denies this suggestion, though, saying that it is too soon. They must watch Dethklok... {A montage of the recording of Dethklok's album ensues. Five months pass. Things, and people, are destroyed. Finally, the band is shown sitting at the soundboard again.) Nathan is finally satisfied with the progress of the record. Toki's guitar is picking up strange sounds, though. Apparently, Toki's pickups are so strong that they pick up the sounds of the whales outside of the submarine (yes, apparently there are whales at the bottom of the Mariana Trench). Toki has to rerecord his tracks, and Pickles suggests isolating him. Nathan has the perfect solution - the Liquid Oxygen Isolation Submersion Chamber. Toki stands inside the Isolation Chamber, wondering what the lights mean. A sailor proclaims that he will die without the safety briefing, but Skwisgaar won't have any of that! While Toki protests, Skwisgaar interrupts again, asking if he wants anything to eat. Toki protests again, and again Skwisgaar isn't really paying attention. He tells Toki not to screw anything up, and ejects the tank into the ocean. The band continues their recording session, when the power fails. Pickles fixes the problem by smashing a bottle of vodka (?) against the control panel, causing an electrical short and releasing nuclear waste into the ocean, mutating a sea horse... A sailor announces the arrival of Dick Knubbler. Skwisgaar isn't thrilled, and Pickles tells them that they need to be professional...unless he pushes them. THEN, Pickles will "knife him in the ****ing...(he trails off as Murderface interrupts). Pickles and Nathan tell Murderface to lay off of the beans. Murderface mumbles something about his boots killing his feet. As he mentions how his (radioactive) feet stink, he vomits violently onto himself. The band stands outside of Dick's boarding pod as he walks onto the vessel. Dick says "Hey guys, let's hear this...hear this album..." and passes out, blood pouring from his head. As they stare, Murderface says, "...I've got those same shoes." Toki is lowered into the ocean again (via Isolation Chamber) while Dick drinks Pop Rocks and Coke to help him adjust to the oceanic pressure, blood flowing from his nose. Nathan plays a track from the album called "Mermaider" - metal for fish, because according to Skwisgaar, "fish don't gots no good metal to listens to". As Toki plays at the bottom of the ocean, a 'Yellow Submarine'-like sequence plays out around him until something interrupts... Dick is amazed by the song, calling fish "a totally untapped market". They've done it again, and he's back on top! As Dick leaves to take the new album back to the record label, Toki emerges from the water, telling them about monsters in the water. Of course, the band ignores him once again and Dick leaves. As Dick reports to The Group, The General is shocked by Dick's appearance (blood is coming from his eyes). Dick's answer: "It's called METAL, General." The General wants a report, but all Dick can do is proclaim the greatness of Dethklok. Playing a track while screaming the praises of the band. Suddenly, the mutant seahorse attacks! Dick speeds towards the surface with the mutant seahorse in full pursuit, and as he races from certain death, the rapid change in pressure eventually causes his eyes to BURST. As the credits roll, several images flash by: Headline: "New Dethklok Album is so awesome, it blinds Producer". (capitalization errors shown on newspaper) A poster for the new Dethklok album, 'Dethwater'. Legions of fans waiting outside of the record store. The album itself, complete with plastic fish in a liquid solution in the jewel case. The cover of Business News Weekly. Dethklok is shown on the cover, with the caption, "Pentuple Platinum: Dethklok releases lowest album ever!" There is also a picture of the album at the bottom of the magazine, and one of Dick Knubbler, with the caption, "These Robot Eyes are Amazing!" The episode closes with a shot of the submarine moving through the ocean, with Dethklok standing at the helm, staring out into the abyss.
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