Mike & Molly

Season 2 Episode 12

Carl Has Issues

2
Aired Monday 9:30 PM Jan 02, 2012 on CBS
8.6
out of 10
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34 votes
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Episode Summary

EDIT

Carl is in a state of panic when Christina wants them to take their relationship to a new level.

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SUBMIT REVIEW

    Trivia, Notes, Quotes and Allusions

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    • TRIVIA (0)

    • QUOTES (6)

      • Grandma: Oh no, what kind of nasty freaky perversion you tryin' to talk that sweet innocent girl into?
        Carl: It's not about that. She wanted me to spend the night with her, but I couldn't do it.
        Grandma: I told you if you kept playin' with yourself you wouldn't be able to play with others.

      • Grandma: Carlton, what are you doing home?
        Carl: Just hangin' out watchin' some football.
        Grandma: No you ain't! Brother Haywood's on his way over here with a deck of cards and a bottle of tawny port.
        Carl: Don't worry, I won't interfere with you card game.
        Grandma: Ain't nobody playin' cards, fool! That's why I need you narrow butt off the couch and out of my house.
        Carl: I'll just go to my room and put my headphones on.
        Grandma: Brother Haywood's been out of town for six weeks. You need to go to the garage and turn on the leaf blower.

      • Vince: Don't mind me, I'm not here, I didn't see anything.
        Molly: Vince, what are you doing back?
        Vince: Well, we were headed up Wacker Drive and I realized I forgot my erectile encouragement medication.
        Molly: Can't you just lie and say you forgot your wallet?
        Vince: Okay, I forgot my wallet! And my weekend won't be as enjoyable without a good stiff wallet.

      • Christina: (kissing and touching Carl) Oh!
        Carl: Don't get your hopes up; that's just a toothbrush wrapped in a pair of underwear.

      • Carl: (to Mike about Christina) I am truly smitten. I mean, when she talks I'm actually listening to her and not just nodding my head and imagining what she looks like naked on a seesaw.

      • Carl: (about cottage cheese) Oh man, how do you eat this stuff? It's not really milk, it's not really cheese; it's like sour cream and oatmeal had an ugly baby.
        Mike: Just pretend it's something else; that's what I do. Right now I'm pretending these plain scrambled eggs are a delightful Denver omelette, this dive we're sitting in is a quaint New Orleans bistro, and I'm Turner, you're Hooch.
        Carl: Really? See, I always go to Lethal Weapon. I'm Danny Glover and you're Mel Gibson with a thyroid condition.
        Mike: Just eat your curds.

    • NOTES (3)

    • ALLUSIONS (0)

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