Carl is in a state of panic when Christina wants them to take their relationship to a new level.
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|
 Billy Gardell |
Mike Biggs |
 Melissa McCarthy |
Molly Flynn |
 Reno Wilson |
Carl McMillan |
 Katy Mixon |
Victoria Flynn |
 Nyambi Nyambi |
Samuel |
 Louis Mustillo |
Vince Moranto |
 Holly Robinson Peete |
Christina |
Recurring Role |
Grandma: Oh no, what kind of nasty freaky perversion you tryin' to talk that sweet innocent girl into?
Carl: It's not about that. She wanted me to spend the night with her, but I couldn't do it.
Grandma: I told you if you kept playin' with yourself you wouldn't be able to play with others.
Grandma: Carlton, what are you doing home?
Carl: Just hangin' out watchin' some football.
Grandma: No you ain't! Brother Haywood's on his way over here with a deck of cards and a bottle of tawny port.
Carl: Don't worry, I won't interfere with you card game.
Grandma: Ain't nobody playin' cards, fool! That's why I need you narrow butt off the couch and out of my house.
Carl: I'll just go to my room and put my headphones on.
Grandma: Brother Haywood's been out of town for six weeks. You need to go to the garage and turn on the leaf blower.
Vince: Don't mind me, I'm not here, I didn't see anything.
Molly: Vince, what are you doing back?
Vince: Well, we were headed up Wacker Drive and I realized I forgot my erectile encouragement medication.
Molly: Can't you just lie and say you forgot your wallet?
Vince: Okay, I forgot my wallet! And my weekend won't be as enjoyable without a good stiff wallet.
Christina: (kissing and touching Carl) Oh!
Carl: Don't get your hopes up; that's just a toothbrush wrapped in a pair of underwear.
Carl: (to Mike about Christina) I am truly smitten. I mean, when she talks I'm actually listening to her and not just nodding my head and imagining what she looks like naked on a seesaw.
Carl: (about cottage cheese) Oh man, how do you eat this stuff? It's not really milk, it's not really cheese; it's like sour cream and oatmeal had an ugly baby.
Mike: Just pretend it's something else; that's what I do. Right now I'm pretending these plain scrambled eggs are a delightful Denver omelette, this dive we're sitting in is a quaint New Orleans bistro, and I'm Turner, you're Hooch.
Carl: Really? See, I always go to Lethal Weapon. I'm Danny Glover and you're Mel Gibson with a thyroid condition.
Mike: Just eat your curds.
Christina sings "O-o-h Child" to her son, a 1970s single recorded and released by Five Stairsteps.
This episode's end titles has Chuck Lorre's Vanity Card #371.
Original International Air Dates:
Canada: January 2, 2012 on CTV
Czech Republic: January 27, 2013 on SMICHOV
Turkey: July 4, 2013 on CNBC-e
S 5 : Ep 7
Aired 1/19/15
S 5 : Ep 7
Aired 1/19/15
S 5 : Ep 6
Aired 1/12/15
S 5 : Ep 5
Aired 1/5/15
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