Mike & Molly

Season 1 Episode 12

First Christmas

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Aired Monday 8:30 PM Dec 13, 2010 on CBS
AIRED:
9.3
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Episode Summary

Mike tries to find a perfect gift for his very first Christmas with Molly.

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  • Mike is really clueless in this episode.

    9.0
    Mike is totally clueless here. Molly gives hints about what she wants and leaves open catalogs on the nightstand. Mike doesn't pick up on any of that. Mike thinks of getting her things like a gift card, a cheese and salami bouquet, a thigh master, and even a cockatoo. Then he also goes and buys a bomber jacket for himself, leaving Molly with nothing to get him. Mike should know that Christmas is NOT the time to be buying things for YOURSELF! In this episode what Carl is right, Mike doesn't deserve a girlfriend.



    Dialogue I thought up;

    Mike: She said she was an open catalog laying on the nightstand. What the hell did that even mean?

    Carl: It meant she had an open catalog on the nightstand showing things she wanted for Christmas. Even I know that and I don't have a girlfriend.

    Mike:(feels stupid) Well, I thought she wanted a cockatoo and then tells me not to get her a bird.

    Carl: Mike, she says that the coffee shop uses and even sells a French press. Then she says that her bag is worn out and the strap's broken. She was hinting that she'd like a French press or a new bag.

    Mike: (feels stupid again)

    Carl: Tell me, where does a cockatoo fit into all those hints?

    Mike: I thought she was trying to be more subtle!

    Carl: The only thing that was being subtle was YOUR BRAIN!

    Mike:(realizes Carl's right) Yeah, I guess.

    Carl: Hope she was able to return that bomber jacket.

    Mike: She got me a bomber jacket? Why didn't you tell me? I wouldn't have bought this one.

    Carl: Oh yeah, sure like you're supposed to tell people what they're getting Christmas before they get it.

    Mike: Well, you told me I was getting a wig tree.

    Carl: That was originally intended for my grandma. What else was I going to do with it?moreless

Trivia, Notes, Quotes and Allusions

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  • TRIVIA (0)

  • QUOTES (7)

    • Mike: Socks and underwear.
      Peggy: A Christmas tradition. I figured your girlfriend could buy you bow ties and top hats.
      Molly: Ties and top hats?
      Mike: Let it go.
      Peggy: I got you the kind that are loose in the crotch to prevent chafing. When he was a boy, I had to butter his thighs.

    • Mike: I hate Christmas.
      Samuel: What happened, did your reindeer quit?

    • Grandma: (about Carl) Michael, you're not taking gift advice from Panty-Clause, are you? The last good gift he gave a woman was leaving.

    • Carl: Now check this out. Nothing beats the basic black married widow that buttons at the crotch for easy access.
      Mike: For going to the bathroom, right?
      Carl: You really don't deserve a girlfriend.

    • Mike: So this was for Victoria?
      Molly: Yeah, don't ask me what was in it and don't bring any police dogs into the house.

    • (Molly gives Peggy's dog a squeaky plastic bone toy)
      Peggy: Oh joy - and it squeaks too. That ought to drive me up a wall.

    • Vince: Wait till you see porn on this thing. The clarity is unbelievable. Provides a whole new level of filth. (turns on the television)
      Joyce: God bless the Japanese.

  • NOTES (2)

  • ALLUSIONS (0)

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