The entire family scrambles to plan a big party for Jay's birthday, and in the process Phil runs into his college nemesis and Cam gets into trouble at a bakery.
The family prepares for Alex's middle-school graduation, including Jay trying to conceal a cosmetic-procedure mishap, Claire is on edge and Phil antagonizes her, and Mitchell makes jokes at Cameron's expense.
Phil and Claire decide to switch parenting roles for a day, while Jay gives entrepreneur advice to a friend opening a dog training business, and Cameron comes down with the flu on the night of a Lady Gaga concert.
Gloria and Claire spend some quality time with their kids by taking them on a hike on Mother's Day. Meanwhile, Phil catches Jay in a moment of weakness.
Mitchell and Cam try to pick a legal guardian for Lily should anything happen to them, thus secretly observing their family's parenting skills in the process.
Cameron takes control of the spring musical at Luke and Manny's school, while Jay's brother pays him and visit, and Phil tries to get the family to be in his new real estate advertisement.
Luke becomes friends with a curmudgeon old neighbor, which does not please Phil and Claire. Meanwhile, Gloria and Manny try to get Jay to join them at the symphony, but in an attempt to avoid the concert, he instead goes with Mitchell and Cameron on their "boys' night out", and Haley babysits for Lily.moreless
After Phil and Claire have a huge argument, which Phil knows nothing about, Gloria counsels Phil and Jay deals with Claire. Meanwhile, Cameron is working diligently on a fundraiser and enlists the help of Mitchell and Luke, and Jay buys Gloria a karaoke machine.
Claire and Phil decide to reprise their role-playing adventure from last year's Valentine's Day. Meanwhile, Jay's surprise plans for Gloria keeps getting interrupted, and a secret admirer comes between Cameron and Mitchell.
It's Phil and Claire's anniversary, and when the kids go to surprise them with breakfast in bed, they get a surprise of their own. Jay and Gloria's plans for a Vegas vacation are ruined because of a brutally honest email accidentally sent to Claire, and Mitchell and Cam try to get into a new restaurant owned by a mom at Lily's preschool.moreless
Phil and Claire pressure Alex to ease back on her school work, but begin to worry about their own intellectual drives. Meanwhile, Jay tries to nip in the bud a burgeoning friendship with a boring couple he and Gloria met on vacation, and Mitchell runs into an old female flame.
Claire tries to stop a neighbor who speeds around the neighborhood, while Phil deals with a difficult client. Mitchell and Cameron meet a charming neighbor, and Jay teaches Manny how to ride a bike.
A School dance is coming up and it will be a first for Luke and Manny. But, Jay and Phil think this is a big deal and it turns into an eventful day at the mall. Claire tells Gloria she doesn't need her help with planning the dance with the parents' dance committee. Cam and Mitchell are surprised when Lily doesn't seem to be making friends on the playground.moreless
Mitchell tries to tell Cameron's mother that he feels uncomfortable around her. Meanwhile, Haley, much to Claire's delight, breaks up with Dylan, but Phil still keeps in contact with him, and Jay's harmless stomach ache gets worse after Manny looks it up on the Internet.
It's Manny's birthday and the family is gathering at a restaurant to celebrate, though Manny himself is depressed about getting older. Phil and Claire decide to engage in a not-so-friendly car race on the way to the restaurant, and Mitch and Cam get sidetracked when they stop at the mall to pick up a gift.moreless
Claire and Haley are both stuck home sick, and begin to bond. Phil deals with a chirping smoke detector, Gloria and Manny surprise Jay at work, and Cameron takes Lily to shoot a commercial behind Mitchell's back.
Claire, in her love for Halloween, makes the house look spooky for the trick or treaters. She wants to give each family member a role to play, but many problems come up to prevent it. Cameron hates Halloween because of a traumatic childhood experience, Mitchell had a bad day at work, and Gloria is acting weird because Jay and Manny teased her accent.moreless
In an attempt to reconnect the family, Phil and Claire challenge them to see who can abstain from using their electronic devices the longest. Meanwhile, Mitchell and Cameron attempt to get Lily into the best pre-school, and Gloria deals with the neighbor's barking dog.
Claire tries to stop Phil from giving an unfunny speech and embarrassing himself at a Realtors' banquet, while Mitchell tries to convince Cameron to change his wardrobe. Meanwhile, Jay and Gloria go to a quinceañera hosted by one of his employees, and Haley gives Alex advice on how to be cool.moreless
After an earthquake hits the town, Claire gets stuck with the plumber in the bathroom. Meanwhile, when going out with Jay, Manny experiences an existential crisis. Also, Mitchell and Cameron use the quake to get out of a party that is being thrown by their friend.
When she finds out that Alex is interested in a boy, Claire becomes over-protective, while Haley tries to give her sister advice. Meanwhile, Gloria begins to cook more traditional Colombian food in honor of her late grandmother, which is received in jest by Jay, and Mitchell reveals his aversion to PDA.moreless
Claire finally convinces Phil that it's time to get rid of their old station wagon, and it prompts everybody to take a trip down memory lane. Meanwhile, Mitchell decides to build Lily a life-size princess castle and Manny invites a cute girl over to study, which doesn't sit well with Gloria.moreless