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Monk Forums

USA (ended 2009)

Funniest Monk Moments/Quotes

  • Avatar of avatar619

    avatar619

    [1]Sep 6, 2006
    • member since: 02/27/06
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    In my opionion the funniest scene was in Employee of the Month When he is going over the prizes for being the employee of the month.

    Monk: Tell me about the Lobster Barrel.
    Joe: It's a family place. It's noisy, there's a million kids. . . . You wouldn't last five minutes. It's got a great all-you-can-eat buffet with seven different types of shrimp--jumbo shrimp, batter-dipped shrimp, tempura shrimp. . . .
    Monk: Okay, stop telling me about the Lobster Barrel.
    Joe: . . . Barbecue shrimp.
    Monk: Stop.

    Joe: Eighty-nine-cent commemorative plaque. Would you kill someone to get this?
    Monk: I'd kill someone not to get that.

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  • Avatar of lingctus

    lingctus

    [2]Sep 7, 2006
    • member since: 02/10/06
    • level: 10
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    Sharona: OMG, OMG, that is Tim Daly, I love him!
    Monk: What is he? Some kind of actor?
    Sharona: Yeah, he was on that show, Wings.
    Monk: Never saw it. Was it good?
    Sharona: Well, he was.
    Edited on 09/07/2006 9:35pm
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  • Avatar of E_Queen

    E_Queen

    [3]Sep 8, 2006
    • member since: 06/18/05
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    The show period is my favorite…but to narrow some, here you go. 

    I liked some quotes from this season (I also posted them in the official forum for those eps).  One is from Mr. Monk, Private Eye…when the fisherman poked Monk and said "I don't like Private Investigators." or something like that and Monk states "Neither do I."  Another was Mr. Monk Gets a New Shrink when he was quickly going through the phases to get to accepting the Dr. leaving practice...Too funny!  Can’t remember all exactly (give me a couple more times watching that ep. ), but one was "You are dead to me!" 

     Another was when Mr Monk gets Jury duty, in reading past threads I see a lot of people didn’t care for the “No Idea” bit but I thought it was funny.  Nat: “No I.D!”, Monk: “No Idea?” 

    I must say that my most favorite too date is on the Christmas episode when Mr. Monk has to dress like Santa and after he does his OCD routine before sitting, when he finally sits he gives a very dry and nonchalant “Ho, Ho, Ho.”  Some may not think that was that funny but OMG, I was on the floor in tears!  Monk is too much!

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  • Avatar of Malcolmjamal

    Malcolmjamal

    [4]Sep 8, 2006
    • member since: 07/30/06
    • level: 8
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    From "Mr. Monk Goes to a Fashion Show":

    Monk: Don't eat the food! I just saw four models back there throwing up!

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  • Avatar of agiftandacurse

    agiftandacurse

    [5]Sep 8, 2006
    • member since: 09/01/06
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    E_Queen wrote:

    The show period is my favorite…but to narrow some, here you go. 

    I liked some quotes from this season (I also posted them in the official forum for those eps).  One is from Mr. Monk, Private Eye…when the fisherman poked Monk and said "I don't like Private Investigators." or something like that and Monk states "Neither do I."  Another was Mr. Monk Gets a New Shrink when he was quickly going through the phases to get to accepting the Dr. leaving practice...Too funny!  Can’t remember all exactly (give me a couple more times watching that ep. ), but one was "You are dead to me!" 

     Another was when Mr Monk gets Jury duty, in reading past threads I see a lot of people didn’t care for the “No Idea” bit but I thought it was funny.  Nat: “No I.D!”, Monk: “No Idea?” 

    I must say that my most favorite too date is on the Christmas episode when Mr. Monk has to dress like Santa and after he does his OCD routine before sitting, when he finally sits he gives a very dry and nonchalant “Ho, Ho, Ho.”  Some may not think that was that funny but OMG, I was on the floor in tears!  Monk is too much!

    I loved that part of the Christmas show too. I also thought No ID , No Idea was great, I can't believe some people didn't like that scene. I laughed my ass off.
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  • Avatar of agiftandacurse

    agiftandacurse

    [6]Sep 8, 2006
    • member since: 09/01/06
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    lingctus wrote:
    Sharona: OMG, OMG, that is Tim Daly, I love him!
    Monk: What is he? Some kind of actor?
    Sharona: Yeah, he was on that show, Wings.
    Monk: Never saw it. Was it good?
    Sharona: Well, he was.
    I don't remember this, what episode was it from?
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  • Avatar of GTZ2k3

    GTZ2k3

    [7]Sep 8, 2006
    • member since: 05/26/03
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    That one's from Mr. Monk and the Airplane (1.16).  That episode had a few funny quotes in it, including the girl playing "Pete and Repeat" with Monk.  My favorite is when Monk tries to laugh in Mr. Monk Goes to the Theater (2.6).  It has to be seen to be appreciated, but trust me, its hillarious.
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  • Avatar of lingctus

    lingctus

    [8]Sep 9, 2006
    • member since: 02/10/06
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    agiftandacurse wrote:
    lingctus wrote:
    Sharona: OMG, OMG, that is Tim Daly, I love him!
    Monk: What is he? Some kind of actor?
    Sharona: Yeah, he was on that show, Wings.
    Monk: Never saw it. Was it good?
    Sharona: Well, he was.
    I don't remember this, what episode was it from?

    GTZ2k3 was right, but it's actually 1-13, the first season was a little short
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  • Avatar of LuvFry

    LuvFry

    [9]Sep 12, 2006
    • member since: 07/12/06
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    I loved the one where he gets the new shrink. The best part is his grieving, but close second is he and the other guy in the windows across from each other. The other guy like Monk has a great line in that ep too. When he gets shot.
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  • Avatar of BTRAV

    BTRAV

    [10]Sep 14, 2006
    • member since: 06/20/05
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    Everyone in my family plus my roommate cracks up every time we think of Monk saying "Oh my God, he's making more!" during Mr. Monk and the Kid.
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  • Avatar of Robinmn

    Robinmn

    [11]Sep 14, 2006
    • member since: 09/14/06
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    The line I love the most (and use frequenlty myself)

    "I have nature on my hands"
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  • Avatar of E_Queen

    E_Queen

    [12]Sep 14, 2006
    • member since: 06/18/05
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    Robinmn wrote:
    The line I love the most (and use frequenlty myself)

    "I have nature on my hands"


    Oh yeah that was a funny one too. And the way he looks when he says it...too funny.
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  • Avatar of HotSuperman

    HotSuperman

    [13]Sep 18, 2006
    • member since: 07/22/06
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    Did you guys see when he won an emmy he came to the stage all in character and said" Oh, no theres been some mistake." I thought that was hillarriously funny. I almost fell out the couch laughing at the way he said it.
    Edited on 09/18/2006 3:41pm
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  • Avatar of pgsuperfan

    pgsuperfan

    [14]Sep 19, 2006
    • member since: 02/04/06
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    lingctus wrote:
    Sharona: OMG, OMG, that is Tim Daly, I love him!
    Monk: What is he? Some kind of actor?
    Sharona: Yeah, he was on that show, Wings.
    Monk: Never saw it. Was it good?
    Sharona: Well, he was.


    was funny he mentioned wings lol
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  • Avatar of E_Queen

    E_Queen

    [15]Sep 19, 2006
    • member since: 06/18/05
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    GTZ2k3 wrote:
    That one's from Mr. Monk and the Airplane (1.16).  That episode had a few funny quotes in it, including the girl playing "Pete and Repeat" with Monk.  My favorite is when Monk tries to laugh in Mr. Monk Goes to the Theater (2.6).  It has to be seen to be appreciated, but trust me, its hillarious.


    Oh yeah I just saw that one this weekend (DVD). That was funny.
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  • Avatar of 2monkish

    2monkish

    [16]Sep 19, 2006
    • member since: 07/29/06
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    Calling 911 for how to change the Kid's diapers, that's one of my favorites, it was hilarious. The dispatcher was perfect. When Adrian panics and tries to answer that "it's a one......now it's a two.....oh my God....it's a three..." by then I'm in tears
    His delivery is impeccable

    I also like when he was telling (I can't remember her name) the Other Woman, when he was (not) eating dinner and faked putting the salad in his mouth, then told her that if she's trying to poison him it's okay, he just wants to know if she is or not. I just liked that whole bit. He was so Monk, to me.
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  • Avatar of ladyphantom

    ladyphantom

    [17]Sep 22, 2006
    • member since: 05/22/06
    • level: 5
    • rank: Caveman Lawyer
    • posts: 398

    Disher: I tracked down Kalamerackas. I don't think he's our guy. Number One: it turns out he was allowed to join the Olympic swim team as an alternate. He got a waiver.
    Stottlemeyer: So there's no motive.
    Disher: Right, Number Two: he's dead. He died in 1995. Number Three: He moved to Europe in the late 80s, so there's no record of him ever returning...
    Stottlemeyer: Randy, excuse me, Sorry to interrupt you but can you read Number Two again?
    Disher: Okey-doke. Uh, he's dead.
    Stottlemeyer: Right, See I probably would have stopped reading after Number Two. In fact I would have read Number Two first.
    Disher: You would've switched them?
    Stottlemeyer: Yeah but that's just me and probably every other adult on the planet Earth.

    That quote, from Mr. Monk and the Class Reunion, cracked me up.  I probably have more other favorites, but that's the first one that comes to mind.

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  • Avatar of nightwing-duck

    nightwing-duck

    [18]Nov 8, 2006
    • member since: 11/09/06
    • level: 3
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    ladyphantom wrote:

    Disher: I tracked down Kalamerackas. I don't think he's our guy. Number One: it turns out he was allowed to join the Olympic swim team as an alternate. He got a waiver.
    Stottlemeyer: So there's no motive.
    Disher: Right, Number Two: he's dead. He died in 1995. Number Three: He moved to Europe in the late 80s, so there's no record of him ever returning...
    Stottlemeyer: Randy, excuse me, Sorry to interrupt you but can you read Number Two again?
    Disher: Okey-doke. Uh, he's dead.
    Stottlemeyer: Right, See I probably would have stopped reading after Number Two. In fact I would have read Number Two first.
    Disher: You would've switched them?
    Stottlemeyer: Yeah but that's just me and probably every other adult on the planet Earth.

    That quote, from Mr. Monk and the Class Reunion, cracked me up.  I probably have more other favorites, but that's the first one that comes to mind.

    great I was just about to post that, oh well, at least I know its also another persons favorite

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  • Avatar of Clem4077

    Clem4077

    [19]Nov 10, 2006
    • member since: 10/11/06
    • level: 7
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    From Mr. Monk and the Marathon Man (season one):

    Stottlemeyer and Randy are interrogating a suspect while Monk and Sharona watch beyond a two-way mirror, and there's a smear of something on the glass which Monk attempts to clean off. The action makes an annoying noise that can be heard in the interrogation room.

    Stottlemeyer: You went over there to talk, you lost your temper? (Continuous squeaking noise). Everybody has a temper. (He goes to the other room).
    Monk: How is it going in there?
    Stottlemeyer: It's going great except he wants to know what the little squeaky noise is behind the mirror.
    Monk: That might have been me... there's a smudge...

    I just thought this scene was hilarious, it made me laugh.

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  • Avatar of evanescfan

    evanescfan

    [20]Nov 15, 2006
    • member since: 06/15/05
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    agiftandacurse wrote:
    E_Queen wrote:

    The show period is my favorite…but to narrow some, here you go. 

    I liked some quotes from this season (I also posted them in the official forum for those eps).  One is from Mr. Monk, Private Eye…when the fisherman poked Monk and said "I don't like Private Investigators." or something like that and Monk states "Neither do I."  Another was Mr. Monk Gets a New Shrink when he was quickly going through the phases to get to accepting the Dr. leaving practice...Too funny!  Can’t remember all exactly (give me a couple more times watching that ep. ), but one was "You are dead to me!" 

     Another was when Mr Monk gets Jury duty, in reading past threads I see a lot of people didn’t care for the “No Idea” bit but I thought it was funny.  Nat: “No I.D!”, Monk: “No Idea?” 

    I must say that my most favorite too date is on the Christmas episode when Mr. Monk has to dress like Santa and after he does his OCD routine before sitting, when he finally sits he gives a very dry and nonchalant “Ho, Ho, Ho.”  Some may not think that was that funny but OMG, I was on the floor in tears!  Monk is too much!

    I loved that part of the Christmas show too. I also thought No ID , No Idea was great, I can't believe some people didn't like that scene. I laughed my ass off.

    i know i did so as well!
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