Muppeteer Jerry Nelson makes a cameo in a scene in which he welcomes back John Goodman.
Kermit: Hey, there, Nigel. How's it goin'? Huh?
Nigel: Well, John Goodman just fell out the window, Clifford is tryin' to get a bear trap off his head, THE PRODUCER'S CACTUS GOT AWAY, AND THERE'S NOBODY ON STAGE TO INTRODUCE JOHNNY FIAMA!!
Kermit: Gee. Sounds like a slow night.
Alf: One of these days, Alison, BANG!! ZOOM!! RIGHT TO THE EARTH!!!
Alison: That would be my first trip since our honeymoon.
Alf: What are you tryin' to do, Newton? Gimme a heart attack?!
Newton: Take it easy, Alfie-boy! Hey! I just came down to give you the tickets ya wanted. You know, to the Space Cadets' Ball.
Alf: Aw, that's great, Newton. You're the best pal a guy ever had. Alison's gonna be so surprised!
Newton: Hey, sure, Alfie-boy. I got 'em right in my vest. Right-here-a-rooney, ha-root-a-doot-doot...!
Alf: JUST GIMME THE TICKETS!!!!
Stagehand: Hey, Mr. Goodman. Welcome back to the show.
John: John. John.
(he takes a seat on the couch)
John: Yeah, it's great to be back on Roseanne. Those Muppets drove me crazy. Could someone get me a coffee, PLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEASE?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!
(Andy and Randy enter)
Randy: We'll get it for you, Master.
Andy: Yeah. We work on this show now.
Andy: You keep forgetting things, like this.
(he exposes a live grenade from John's previous sketch)
John: Oh, no, you idiot! That's a live grenade!
Andy: A what?
John: A live grenade!
Randy: A WHAT?!
John: (covers his ears) A LIVE GRENADE!!!
Randy: (as the grenade explodes, causing John to hit the ceiling) THANK YOU, GUYS!!!
John: I'm, uh, not relaxing.
(after the blast)
John: Everybody okay?
Rizzo: Hey, Sarge, take a look at Indiana.
John: (sees Indiana in halves) NO!!
Indiana: Sarge, you told me you was gonna get me home in 1 piece!
John: I was way off on that one! Huh? But don't worry. I'll get a message to that girl of yours, Jill.
Indiana: Oh, forget Jill. Get a message to that steak. Tell 'er I... I couldn't think of a steak joke.
John: Hey, Clifford, the ig-pays are a little upid-stay.
John: 'Don't look good, fellas. The enemy cheese has us surrounded. RATS!
Rats: Yes, sir!
John: No, no, no! I meant... Shoot!
(the rats fire wild shots into the air)
John: No! No! No! Darn! And if anyone of you clowns pulls out a pair of socks, I'll slug ya!
(a slug comes by)
Slug: Did someone say "slug"?
John: (shoves the slug away) Get outta here!
Statler: Well there you go. There's nothing like good comedy.
Waldorf: Nothing like it on this show!
Dr. Phil Van Neuter: Two letters, that's it? (Mulch mumbles and growls) What do you mean the rest were for you? You can't even read!
John Goodman: All things considered, this is one of the worst experiences I've ever had.
Clifford: That's what all our guest stars say.
John Goodman: Well, at least you're consistent.
Clifford's intro: Welcome to Muppets Tonight, the show that has families all around the world saying...
(cut to a family watching the show)
Family: I don't get it.
Family dog: Oh, I do. You see, they're making fun of all of you, and... uh... oh, never mind...