My Wife and Kids
ABC (ended 2005)
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Season 5
- Ep 26The 'V' Story5/17/05
Now that the kids are almost out of their hair, Jay insists that Michael have a vasectomy so they can feel free to enjoy themselves, but Michael is reluctant to go through with the operation. - Ep 25R.V. Dreams5/10/05
Michael, who is determined to make record time driving from Connecticut to the Grand Canyon in a luxurious R.V., convinces his reluctant family to make the road trip so they can spend quality time together in the R.V. Along the way, Michael puts the family through many misadventures including getting lost and in his haste neglects to read one of the R.V. manual's most crucial operational features.moreless - Ep 24Michael Sells the Business5/3/05
With a lucrative bid from a large company offering to purchase Kyle Trucking, Michael convinces Jay that, if they sold their business, they'd be able to spend more quality time with Jr., Jr. and watch him grow up - something they wish they could have done more of with their own kids. But the offer goes bust and Michael's nemesis, Bobby Shaw, comes up with a surprising proposal. Meanwhile, Kady and Claire antagonize each other over who gets to spend more time in the bathroom.moreless - Ep 23Graduation Day4/26/05
It's Jay's college graduation day and Michael is determined to make it go flawlessly - but everything that could go wrong does, and the day seems destined for disaster. To make matters worse, Jay thinks Michael, who didn't want her to go to college in the first place, is trying to sabotage her special day.moreless - Ep 22Michael's Sandwich4/12/05
Under a time deadline to catch his flight, Michael tries to prepare his signature, masterpiece sandwich to take with him on the plane. But various family distractions delay his getting to the airport, and his beloved sandwich is searched by suspicious security guards. - Ep 21Jr.'s Cartoon3/29/05
When Jr. wins a national competition for his cartoon entitled "My Wife and Kid" - based on himself, Vanessa, the baby and the rest of the Kyle family - it catches the attention of ABC. Michael becomes Jr.'s agent, but the meeting with the television executives goes badly, crushing Jr.'s dream opportunity, so now Michael has to find a way to rectify the situation. Meanwhile, Claire threatens to break up with Tony unless he can bring some "umph" into their relationship.moreless - Ep 20Celibacy3/15/05
When Jay tells Michael that their love life will be even better if they are celibate for six months, Michael is willing to abide by her wishes, although reluctantly. Meanwhile, Franklin and Kady plant some seeds in the ground to symbolize their growing love for each other, but the seeds grow into an ingredient for a love potion that Jay uses to spice up her romantic dinner for Michael.moreless - Ep 19Michael Joins a Gym3/8/05
The same day Michael realizes he can't fit into his favorite pair of vintage jeans, he runs into an old high school friend, the muscular Daryl (Terry Crews), who doesn't look any older than when Michael last saw him. He enlists Darryl's help to get him back into shape and, in the process, becomes obsessed with looking fit and buff. Meanwhile, Franklin fails his first test and fears that Kady will no longer accept him.moreless - Ep 18The Remodel3/1/05
Realizing that the garage is no longer a suitable living situation for Jr., Vanessa and the baby, Jay insists that Michael have it remodeled. When the contractor bids are too expensive for his taste, Michael decides to take on the job himself, with Jr.'s help. But when they get in over their heads, Franklin - who happens to be a certified contractor - has to come to their rescue.moreless - Ep 17The Bahamas (2)2/22/05
While at the Atlantis, Paradise Island resort in the Bahamas for a family vacation, lovebirds Michael and Jay find themselves stranded on the isolated Magic Island - along with a rapidly rising tide -- and the only other person there who can help them is Michael's talkative and annoying golf buddy, Jimmy - who refuses to do so since they weren't willing to spend time with him when they had the chance. Meanwhile, Jr. leaves Vanessa and the baby behind so he can enjoy the resort's activities; Tony and Claire hang out at the beach bar and she realizes too late that her island drink contains alcohol; and Kady and Franklin run into his nemesis, Francesco Mumfordi, who has stolen one of Franklin's theories.moreless - Ep 16The Bahamas (1)2/15/05
When the Kyles arrive at the Atlantis Paradise Island resort in the Bahamas for their family vacation, Michael announces that all he wants to do is get some rest and relaxation-by himself. But no sooner does he settle into his lounge chair for some peace and quiet than his talkative and annoying golf buddy, Jimmy, shows up and insists that they spend time together. Michael is relieved to find a way out when Jay invites him to the isolated Magic Island so they can have some romantic fun. As their day winds down and it's time to leave, the boat never shows up to take them back and the couple find themselves stranded in the middle of nowhere.moreless - Ep 15Silence Is Golden2/8/05
Michael reluctantly accompanies Jay on a meditation weekend, where he has trouble following the rule of silence. - Ep 14Sweetheart's Day2/1/05
When Jay insists that Michael buy her a present for "Sweetheart's Day," a reluctant Michael comes up with a scheme to base the price of Jay's gift on her attitude towards him at a particular moment. He shares his plan with Jr., Tony and Franklin, hoping that they will follow his lead, but it leads straight to trouble.moreless - Ep 13Study Buddy1/25/05
Michael feels neglected because Jay is spending all of her time studying for her psychology final which is the week after! He decides to tutor her, but his efforts cause her to fail. To make it up to her, he tries to bribe her professor to let her re-take the test. Meanwhile, when Kady thinks Franklin prefers her smart friend over her, she tries to act more "brainy."moreless - Ep 12They Call Me El Foosay1/18/05
When Vanessa innocently buys Jr. a foosball game, Jr. discovers his competitive nature and becomes obnoxious when he wins. When Michael challenges Jr. and wins, he initially wants to teach his son a lesson about being a good winner. But then when Michael continues to win, his "fatherly lesson" goes out the window and instead he becomes obsessed with playing foosball. Desperate, the Kyles have to come up with a plan to break the game's hold on Michael.moreless - Ep 11Careful What You Wish For1/11/05
When Jay wishes that Michael would give her the kind of romantic attention that she sees newlywed Vanessa getting from Jr., Michael decides to kill Jay with kindness so he can get back to watching TV and ignoring her. Meanwhile, Franklin tells Kady that he thinks he's too short and goes to great lengths to appear otherwise.moreless - Ep 10The Wedding11/30/04
Jr. and Vanessa announce that they want to get married in two weeks, Vanessa having told Jr. that she wants a small, simple wedding. Michael and Jay offer to help plan it, but instead of something simple and sweet, they plan an elaborate and expensive ceremony that includes dolphins, a castle, and 751 guests. Frustrated, Vanessa tells Jr. he needs to regain control of things, forcing him to decide whether he should stand up to Michael.moreless - Ep 9The Return of Bobby Shaw11/23/04
Michael's enemy Bobby Shaw, tricks Jr. into signing a contract making Jr. his slave for the rest of his life! When Michael tries to get him out of the contract, they end up in a rap dance off. Claire and Jay battle it out for the affections of their Yoga instructor.moreless - Ep 8Restaurant Wars11/16/04
At first, Michael is skeptical that Jay can be successful at opening her own soul food restaurant. But his competitive and supportive sides emerge when the Hoos, the owners of the Chinese restaurant across the street, use sneaky tactics to put "Jay's Soooooouuuul Kitchen" out of business. - Ep 7The Proposal11/9/04
Jr. is finally ready to propose to Vanessa, but every time he tries to do so, something interrupts him, including Michael and Jay - who are preparing to compete against each other in a karaoke competition. - Ep 6Pokerface10/19/04
Michael advises Jr. that it's ok to spend some time away from Vanessa and the baby, but his advice misfires when Jr. invites Jay along to their all-male poker game. Michael decides, in turn, to crash Jay's all-female book club, where they're discussing the latest book by Angeline Boudreaux. - Ep 5The Fellowship of the Baby10/12/04
When an overwhelmed Jr. thinks he is not smart enough to take care of his own son, Michael tells Jr. that "Jr., Jr." is a "magic baby," and that every time he holds him, it will make Jr. smarter. The ploy works, but in the process Jr. becomes somewhat arrogant with his new-found knowledge, so Michael brings Franklin in so that the two geniuses can match wits. Meanwhile, Kady catches Claire sneaking back into her bedroom after hours and threatens to tell their parents, unless Claire does some favors for her.moreless - Ep 4Class Reunion10/5/04
Michael is reluctant to attend his high-school reunion until a former rival challenges him to a dance-off... - Ep 3Child-care Class9/28/04
Michael fails a child-care course for grandparents, so Vanessa and Jr. refuse to let him baby-sit his grandchild for the rest of the week. - Ep 2Fantasy Camp9/21/04
Michael can't focus on much else after learning that he'll be going to sports legend Michael Jordan's fantasy basketball camp in Las Vegas. Everyone shares his excitement but for different reasons and finds some reason as to why they should tag along. Once there, Michael learns that there's been a mix-up with the game schedule, so he resorts to some inventive ploys of his own to ensure he gets to play his idol.moreless - Ep 1My Wife and Kids: Access All Areas6/12/04
Trouble presents an all new 'Access all Areas' for My Wife and Kids.
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Season 4
- Ep 30The Baby (2)5/26/04
Jr. and Vanessa announce that they want to have the baby at home with the help of Summer Breeze, a midwife whose natural childbirth methods include the whole family's participation. - Ep 28The Baby (1)5/26/04
Jr. and Vanessa announce that they want to have the baby at home with the help of Summer Breeze, a midwife whose natural childbirth methods include the whole family's participation. - Ep 27What Do You Know?5/19/04
The family plays a game which shows them exactly how much they know about each other. - Ep 26Hand Model5/12/04
In a twist of fate, Michael is recruited as a hand model during Claire's modelling audition. As he flaunts his newfound fame, he is careful to protect the family's new financial asset his hands. Meanwhile Franklin feels threatened by Kady's friendship with Rachel, so on Jr.'s advice, he takes matters into his own hands.moreless - Ep 25The Maid5/5/04
While Jay is away at a seminar, Michael hires a maid, Mrs. Hopkins, to look after the family. Mrs. Hopkins fulfills their every need and want to a sweet perfection, including homemade ice cream, an immaculately clean house and handmade outfits for Claire. When Jay comes home, she appreciates Mrs. Hopkins' attention to every detail, but begins to feel that perhaps she has taken over just a bit too much.moreless - Ep 24The Director4/28/04
In his excitement to tape a basketball game, Michael accidentally records over a home video of Kady's first steps, which happens to be one of Jay's most cherished family moments. When Jay decides to have a family home movie night, Michael must act quickly and enlists Franklin's help to reenact that moment of Kyle family history.moreless - Ep 23Romantic Night4/21/04
Wanting to spend quiet time together, Michael plans a romantic evening with Jay at an exclusive hotel. Then, when Jr. mistakenly cancels the reservation, Michael tries to create a romantic night at home. But things take a disastrous turn when Michael hurts his head trying to shut off the water valve, Jay handcuffs them to each other but can't find the key and a burnt roast almost causes the house to burn down.moreless - Ep 22Calvin Goes to Work3/31/04
When Calvin, begs Michael to give him a job at Kyle Trucking, Michael does so reluctantly and his worst fears are realized. Calvin's way of dealing with customers and merchandise leaves little to be desired, and now Michael must find a way to get rid of the man without getting himself hurt in the process. Meanwhile, Claire gets Franklin to help her with her science paper.moreless - Ep 21Calvin Comes To Stay3/10/04
Calvin, Vanessa's gregarious father, has an argument with his wife, Jasmine, gets kicked out of the house and moves in with the Kyles, against their wishes. When he starts eating everything in sight and keeps everyone awake with his loud snoring, a frustrated Michael comes up with a clever plan to get Calvin back home.moreless - Ep 20Empty Nest (1)3/3/04
During a rare occasion when Michael and Jay have the house to themselves, they find themselves reminiscing about the fun times they've had with their kids and various friends. Some of these memorable moments include Jay's obsession with her weight and Michael's visit to a proctologist. - Ep 19Outbreak Monkey2/25/04
When an ecstatic Michael scores a ticket to see basketball star LeBron James play at Madison Square Garden, his excitement quickly turns to paranoia when, just days before the game, everyone in the Kyle household except Michael comes down with the flu. To ensure that he won't miss the game, he goes to absurd extremes to keep from getting sick, including spraying disinfectant on his family and using a ten-foot grabber to hand Jay her orange juice.moreless - Ep 18Illegal Smile2/18/04
The day after an anti-wrinkle injection goes awry for Michael and he ends up with an unnatural expression, he has to fight a traffic ticket in court. The judge is angered by his frozen grin and sentences him to a night in jail, where Michael's cell mate, Big Guy, thinks Michael is coming on to him since he keeps smiling at him.moreless - Ep 17The Anniversary Present2/11/04
Michael and Jay try to hide their disappointment when they don't receive the wedding anniversary gifts they are expecting from each other. Meanwhile, with Franklin's help, novice cook Claire hopes to prepare a gourmet dinner for her parents' anniversary present. - Ep 16Jr. Sells His Car2/4/04
Jr. restores his prized 1964 Impala, but then he and Vanessa surprise everyone when they decide to sell it in order to have money for their new baby. Meanwhile, Franklin seeks advice from Michael on how to act more like a normal kid. - Ep 15Candy Wars1/21/04
When Kady wants to spend some quality time with her father, she enlists Michael's help in the school candy drive. But when the father of last year's winner claims he can prevail once again, a competitive Michael loses sight of helping Kady and commits to selling an exorbitant number of chocolate bars.moreless - Ep 14Moving on Out1/7/04
Tired of living in the garage, Jr. looks for an apartment and enlists his buddy, John, to be a co-signer except that John has to dress up and pose as Jr.'s grandmother for the realtor. When Jr. and Vanessa's families come to visit the couple's new apartment, Jay is shocked to find that her new grandchild might be living in a run-down building with yellow police tape around the entrance.moreless - Ep 13Of Mice and Man12/17/03
When Jay finds mouse droppings, she demands that Michael hire an exterminator to get rid of them, but, as usual, Michael is determined to handle it himself. Meanwhile, Claire is also freaked out by a rodent when she accidentally runs over a squirrel while driving home. - Ep 12The Lady Is Not a Tramp12/10/03
Michael's imagination takes off when he finds a package of condoms in daughter Claire's backpack the same day her boyfriend, Tony, is returning from a month in the desert. Annoyed that her father is jumping to conclusions, Claire decides to give him a taste of his own unique brand of discipline. Meanwhile Jr. accidentally gives Kady his pet dog's medicine and Kady pretends to turn into a dog.moreless - Ep 11Michael's Band11/26/03
When Michael's old friend and former bandmate, Johnny "Saxophone" Watson, comes to town for a gig, it turns out Johnny's piano player can't make it. Michael eagerly accepts an invitation to take the man's place, but refuses to admit that his musical skills have got rusty. Meanwhile, love is blind when it comes to Franklin realizing that his little sister, Aretha, is a much better singer than the tone-deaf Kady.moreless - Ep 10While Out11/19/03
Much to Claire's delight, Michael and Jay forget to recite their house rules "No friends, no fires, no freedom, no fun" - before going out for the night. As a result, Claire decides to throw a party so she can get in with the so-called right crowd. Things get raucous when someone spikes the punch and a drunken Tony fulfills a fantasy and streaks down the street naked.moreless - Ep 9Marathon11/12/03
When Jay works hard to get in shape and run a marathon, Michael thinks that, since he's a man, he can run the marathon as well - without any real training. Meanwhile, bible-quoting Tony asks the gorgeous Claire to dress "ugly" so he won't feel so turned on. - Ep 8Ultrasound11/5/03
The Kyles and Vanessa's parents escort her to her first ultrasound. When asked if they wanted to know the baby's sex, Michael is the only one who stands out with a positive answer. Obsessed with knowing whether he's having a grandson or a granddaughter, he tries by all means to have the doctor tell him. Meanwhile, Franklyn freaks out with the idea of losing Kady to "Smilin' Willie" and tries to learn how to be a dance master.moreless - Ep 7The Funeral10/29/03
The Kyles are willing to support Michael's inconsolable employee, Larry, who can't get over losing his 103-year-old grandmother. But Larry goes overboard when, at the funeral, he asks little Kady to kiss his "Grammy" goodbye and for Jay to sing his beloved grandmother's favorite R&B song for the last time. - Ep 6He's Having a Baby10/22/03
Worried about Junior's fathering skills, Michael decides to enroll him in a parenting course. Junior is reluctant to attend, so Michael gives him a water balloon that Junior should keep for a week as if it was the baby. If it breaks, he'll have to attend the course. Michael doesn't let Junior have it easy, and Junior insists that more than wanting to teach him how to be a good parent, Michael doesn't have any trust in him.moreless - Ep 5Meet the Parents10/15/03
Vanessa's parents come over the Kyles house to discuss the future baby's situation. Michael is outraged with the demands from the Scotts, but Calvin's size makes Michael think twice before taking any drastic measures. They take the Scotts out for dinner and are left with the bill. Realizing they have a couple of con artists on their hands, Michael and Jay stand up for themselves and set the baby's true needs which don't include a new house for the Scotts as Calvin wanted.moreless - Ep 4Jay Goes to School10/8/03
Jay decides to go to college and get her psychology degree, which Michael fully reprehends her for. He doesn't want her to put the household second because it would jeopardize the entire family and eventually could ruin their marriage. After going to a real psychologist, Michael and Jay come to terms and she agrees to scale back her classes as he decides to let her pursue her dream. Meanwhile, Junior's friends turn his old crib into some sort of vehicle.moreless - Ep 3Jr. Executive10/1/03
Michael wants Jr. to learn the family business by starting at the bottom, so he assigns Jr. to do menial jobs around Kyle Trucking. Jr. however, decides to use the fact that he's the boss' son to his advantage and convinces other employees to do his work for him. Elsewhere Claire arranges a secret date with a guy she met on the Internet in a Shakespeare chat room.moreless - Ep 2The Sweet Hairafter9/24/03
Michael meets his friend Jimmy at the golf club and is impressed with how much hair he's grown with the help of some "miracle" pills called "Come Hair Now". As he starts to take them in overdose, weird stripes of hair rise from his chronically bald head. He also starts to get paranoid that Jay is trying to kill him after they take out life insurance. Meanwhile, Kady becomes very jealous of Claire when she volunteers to be on the big sister program.moreless - Ep 1From Dummy to Daddy9/24/03
After hearing the shocking news that their son Junior is going to become a father, Michael and Jay freak out. They try to talk with him and help him realize he can't support a family living in their garage and having no job, so Michael offers him a job at his firm. Meanwhile, Tony feels guilty about having spicy thoughts about Claire and Franklin is still out for Junior's spot on the Kyle family.moreless
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Season 3
- Ep 27Graduation (2)5/21/03
Junior finally graduates, and his parents give him a trip to Japan as a gift and as a way to separate Junior and Vanessa, who are planning on moving in together and getting married as soon as they start college. Both Kady and Clare admit their sadness on Junior leaving, and Michael and Jay feel proud of having raised a semi-successful child. They go out to relive some of their memories and when they come back late at night they find Junior and Vanessa sitting in the kitchen...moreless - Ep 26Graduation (1)5/21/03
Jr.'s graduation is coming up, and he breaks the news to his family that he wants to go to college. At first shocked, Michael decides to help him make a good impression. Meanwhile, Claire wears a blonde wig to call her parents attention, thinking she has been forgotten now that Jr. is in the spotlight. Franklin applies for the soon available 'son' spot in the Kyle family.moreless - Ep 25Not So Hostile Takeover5/14/03
Claire comes home with the exciting news that she was invited to senior prom. Jay is excited about it and volunteers to chaperone at the dance, in order to keep Claire safe from her date, a senior quarterback. Meanwhile, Junior falls into another one of Michael's plans once he tries to teach him a lesson about money management.moreless - Ep 24The Big Bang Theory5/7/03
Michael and Jay panic when Claire reveals that she and Tony have decided to have sex. Her parents try by all means to change their minds and stop them. - Ep 23Tee for Too Many4/30/03
Jay decides to spend more quality time with Michael - by watching him play golf. Meanwhile, Jr., who only wants to go to college because Vanessa's going, asks Franklin for help with the application essay and Franklin's advice to Junior was to write down what inspired him. - Ep 22Sharon's Picture4/9/03
Jay gets mad at Michael after finding a photo of an attractive former girlfriend among his things but he throws it away and has a romantic night with Jay in a fancy restaurant. Franklin has trouble admitting that his little sister Aretha is an outstanding singer. - Ep 21Claire's Permit3/26/03
Claire has taken her driving permit, but Michael won't lend her the car because he doesn't think she can drive very well. Nevertheless, Claire steals the car keys thinking if she goes out really quick while her parents are gone they will never notice. Unfortunately, she drives by them on her way to meet her friends, and Michael decides to teach her a lesson the Michael Kyle way: stealing the car and making Clare feel guilty about it.moreless - Ep 20Here Come Da Judge3/5/03
When Jr and Claire find a lost wallet containing $500, it's time for a session of "family court" to decide who gets the money which ends up getting brought to the police department out of guilt. Meanwhile, Claire's boyfriend Tony induces her to become a vegetarian. - Ep 19Jury Duty2/26/03
Michael and Jay are asked to serve jury duty together. Michael's elected foreman and wants to move on the trial quickly so he can get home to watch the Godfather marathon on TV. But Jay won't vote guilty because she thinks there has to be a debate first. Thanks to that, Michael has to rent the videos and at the store, he meets an insurance salesman whom he mistakes for a mobster, and is convinced that the mob is after him due to the case.moreless - Ep 18Jr's Risky Business (2)2/12/03
After walking in on Jr. and his girlfriend having sex on his bed, Michael decides that he and Junior can no longer live under the same roof and throws his son out. Feeling sympathetic for her baby, Jay opposes to Michael's attitude, but at the same time agrees the boy needs a severe punishment. She makes Jr. stay in a tent in the backyard until she can cool things down with Michael...moreless - Ep 17Jr's Risky Business (1)2/5/03
As a very impressed Michael sees it, his son's girlfriend, Vanessa is an absolute prize: "She's beautiful, smart, personable and polite... you guys have nothing in common," he tells Jr. But there's something about her that rubs Jay the wrong way. Elsewhere in the courtship department, Kady's similarly smart and personable gentleman caller is a budding piano prodigy named Franklin. As for Claire, all she's courting is a severe case of nerves: the PSATs are coming up and her face has broken out in hives.moreless - Ep 16Man of the Year1/29/03
Jay nominates Michael for the "Small Businessman of the Year" award and he assumes he's going to win it. Meanwhile, Claire helps herself to items from Jay's makeup bag once too often and ends up grounded. - Ep 15Blackout1/22/03
Michael wants some time alone in the house and makes a deal with Jay for her and the kids to get out of the house. He has to pay for Claire to agree on going to the mall and is forced to watch The Little Mermaid with Kady for the hundredth time. He switches the movie to Gremlins, which scares the death out of the poor girl, and when the power goes off Claire freaks out about losing her entire work on the computer. In the end, the power failure ends up bringing the Kyles closer together.moreless - Ep 14Michael's Tribe12/18/02
Michael (aka: Chief Bald Eagle) is recruited to camp out with Kady and her friends and teach them Native American lore. Meanwhile, Claire and "the new Tony" plan to stay out all night themselves: they're plotting to sneak out to a 'rave' which all goes horribly wrong and Claire gets grounded for her actions.moreless - Ep 13Open Your Heart12/11/02
Jay decides to attend an "Open Your Heart" seminar for struggling couples, even though she and Michael are happier than ever. At the seminar, they are teased against each other and stop talking to one another. Meanwhile, Michael wants his children to learn the value of money and tells Jr. to start his own business selling monkeyfish like he did. Jr., instead of the monkeyfish, decides to get 100% refunds on the clothes Claire buys with a 40% discount at the store she's working. When Jr. gets caught, Claire gets fired and Michael punishes him by making him wear the clothes he wanted refund.moreless - Ep 12Chair Man of the Board12/4/02
Michael's old friend Tommy is coming over and Michael is very excited because he and Tommy used to compete for everything. But his excitement soon turns into awkwardness when Tommy comes in on a wheelchair and Michael doesn't know how to act with the situation. Meanwhile, Claire is caught shoplifting and gets grounded for it. When she confronts Kady about who put the nail polishers in her purse she feels so guilty she confesses to their parents that Claire didn't do it. The punishment? She will no longer be treated like a baby.moreless - Ep 11Jay the Artist11/27/02
Feeling that she has no space and time of her own due to home duties, Jay decides to paint. The result is a portrait of Michael based on Michelangelo's David, which makes Michael feel a little bit "diminished". They start an argument over it, which ends on Michael finally agreeing on letting Jay show her work at a friend's art gallery with a "big" change, that is. Meanwhile, Michael renews acquaintances with old buddy Steve, while the kids are encouraged to develop their artistic abilities as well. Claire designs clothes, Kady plays the piano, and Junior writes some bizarre poetry.moreless - Ep 10Jr's Dating Dilemma11/20/02
Michael decides to help Junior on his women approach techniques, seeing that his son has absolutely no clue on how to behave around women. Meanwhile, Jay freaks out about her dream of Michael and Janet Jackson having an affair. - Ep 9Sister Story11/13/02
Michael's sister Kelly is coming over for the weekend, which freaks Jay out because every time Kelly comes over she overstays her welcome and always gets on Jay's nerves. Things heat up when Kelly brings up Sharon, Michael's old girlfriend and Kelly's best friend... - Ep 8The Fighting Kyles11/6/02
Sick and tired of listening to their kids fights, Michael and Jay act like they are fighting themselves so Jr. and Claire can see how annoying it is and quit it. But the three Kyle children get the wrong idea and think their parents are splitting up, and try their best to bond them and end the fake fights.moreless - Ep 7Crouching Mother, Hidden Father10/30/02
Jay volunteered to be the director for Kady's kindergarten class play, but due to illness she is forced to step away from the production, leaving it all on the hands of Michael. Michael allows the children to make any changes they want on Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet, and the result is a very successful and very weird play.moreless - Ep 6Claire's New Boyfriend10/23/02
After Michael admits liking Claire's boyfriend, Tony, she dumps him. The poor kid is devastated, and since Michael likes him so much he decides he's going to help Tony win Claire back especially after seeing her new boyfriend, Jason. Meanwhile, Jay refuses to admit she looks like Jr.'s drawing of her. Instead, she believes she looks more like Halle Berry.moreless - Ep 5Diary of a Mad Teen10/16/02
While making Claire's bed, Jay finds her diary hidden under the mattress. She can't resist the temptation of reading it and is quite shocked to learn that her daughter is thinking about taking the next step with Tony. Meanwhile, Michael is scheduled for an appointment with the eye doctor even though he insists there's nothing wrong with his sight. He decides to have Jr. drive him there so he can test his driving abilities for an upcoming date with a girl. All Kady wants to do is play hide-and-seek...moreless - Ep 4Samba Story10/9/02
Tired of the same dinner-and-a-movie routine, Jay convinces Michael to take dancing lessons to spice up their relationship. When they get there, only more problems waits for Michael. Meanwhile, Claire's accepted into the cheerleading squad, but won't believe she only got in for her looks and not for her talent. - Ep 3The Kyles Go to Hawaii (3)10/2/02
A mad scramble ensues when Michael finds out that the family's flight home from Hawaii leaves much earlier than he thought, but matters are complicated when a love-smitten Jr. insists on staying with his new love, Leilani. Meanwhile Kady refuses to leave without her beloved doll, Little Pippy, and Claire has to go to extremes to keep her parents from finding out about her exorbitant hotel charges.moreless - Ep 2The Kyles Go to Hawaii (2)9/25/02
Michael and Janet decide to go out on a romantic dinner, leaving their kids all alone. Claire and Jr. fight over who'll have to stay in the room babysitting for Kady, but Claire lets her brother get out of the duty, after all it's not often he gets a date. Kady and Claire decide to spend their times on the hotel's spa, while at the dinner table Jay and Michael both struggle to say no to the temptations they meet a female underwear model and a male chest/abs model. When they go back to the hotel, they find their three kids resting peacefully so they decide to extend their night at the beach, celebrating their second honeymoon.moreless - Ep 1The Kyles Go to Hawaii (1)9/25/02
The Kyles are leaving for their family vacation on Hawaii, but instead of taking only one flight straight to the island, Michael thought it would be a good idea to make a quick tour around the country, so they make stops at New York, Chicago, Denver and other cities before they get to Hawaii (two days later).moreless
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Season 2
- Ep 28Anniversary (1)5/22/02
Michael and Janet's 15th anniversary is approaching. Jay's girlfriend Wanda brings her Brian McKnight's tickets (a concert Jay was really looking forward to see), but unfortunately she has to turn it down because it's on the same night as their anniversary. Wanda says Michael will forget about it, but Jay refuses to believe in that and even has the kids spy on him to find out if he's secretly planning something.moreless - Ep 27Anniversary - Part 15/21/02
- Ep 26Jr. Gets His License5/15/02
Michael is stopped by a cop while giving Jr. a driving lesson and it seems that Michael's license has expired. So father and son must both take a driving test. - Ep 25The Bowling Show5/8/02
The Tylers and The Kyles go at it in a game of bowling. All this is going on during Star Trek night. Junior meanwhile develops a crush on the Tylers' daughter and can't work up the courage to ask her out. - Ep 24Make Over5/1/02
Jay and Michael are grocery shopping when they run into Susan Green, former cheerleader from their highschool. Susan is in great shape, which makes Jay feel ugly and inadequate like she did back in high school. Jay feels depressed and Claire talks her into getting a makeover to boost her self-esteem. Meanwhile, Junior gets himself locked in a girl's locker after a misfortunate attempt to steal her bra.moreless - Ep 23Back Story4/3/02
When the kids tease Michael about getting old, Michael pretends to have hurt his back in a game of Twister so they will have to cater to his every whim. Later Jay finds out about his antics and plays a practical joke back on Michael. - Ep 22Jr. Kyle, Boy Genius3/27/02
After receiving Jr.'s SATs score results (a perfect 1600), the Kyles believe they have a genius in the house and start treating him more respectfully. Meanwhile, Jay asks the girls what they to be when they get older. Claire wants to shop, and Kady wants to be an officer, so she starts practicing it around the house.moreless - Ep 21Working Relationship3/20/02
Jay's feeling bored ever since she was fired. She can't think of anything else to do around the house, and won't let Michael watch the Jordan game until he hires her as the new accountant at his firm. What comes as a great idea for Jay turns out to be a nightmare for Michael, because Jay wants to turn his morning ritual into running errands; takes over his office and gives the employees way more breaks than they should get. Meanwhile, Claire tries to show Kady that E.T. is not so scary.moreless - Ep 20Return of the Wall3/4/02
Jay is coaching Kady's soccer team but the girls complain it's not any fun and Michael tries talking to Jay about it. He ends up taking over coaching the team and promises to make it fun for the girls. Jay breaks the news that she's been asked to coach another team, and they'll be playing Michael's on Saturday.moreless - Ep 19Failure to Communicate2/22/02
Michael's parents come to visit him, but Michael is worried about the way they treat each other and how that is reflecting on his own children. After a disastrous attempt to fix things, Michael and Jay finally decide to let things the way they were. Meanwhile, Jay and Michael worry about Jr.'s rush to have sex and his new girlfriend.moreless - Ep 19Papa Said Knock You Out2/27/02
Michael freaks out when he spots a grey hair, but not on his head. He feels he's getting too old, and decides to practice boxing again to get in shape. He even teaches Jr. some tricks and some punches, until Jr. knocks Michael out, giving him a black eye. Meanwhile, Claire is ready to go on her first date with Tony, and Jr. mishears their conversation and thinks they're having sex.moreless - Ep 18Double Date2/13/02
Claire wants to go on her first date with Tony, but Michael is reluctant to let her. So he decides he and Jay should also go with them to the movies so they can check on Tony. Meanwhile, Jr.'s at home babysitting for Kady and decides to take advantage of her.moreless - Ep 17Table for Too Many (2)2/6/02
The concluding chapter in Michael's disasterous evening where things don't get better as the family they have to sit with are the wrong side of annoying. - Ep 16Table for Too Many (1)2/6/02
Michael is forced to take the family out for a meal but really begrudges it as it will cost him a lot of money. Michael gets ever more annoyed as they keep spending money on nothing and when the service is poor, Michael has had enough... - Ep 15Road Trip1/30/02
Jay organizes a historic trip to Paul Revere's house for the entire family to learn more about American history. She even packs colonial food (which Michael hates) to give it an extra touch. Michael, unlike Jay, isn't so excited about spending a long time with Jay and Claire in a car. The reason? They're both on that time of the month, which spells trouble!moreless - Ep 14Get Out1/23/02
Michael is on a mission — to get his notoriously late family dressed and ready to go to a wedding in 15 minutes, but everybody has some sort of problem that keeps them from getting fully ready. - Ep 13Quality Time1/16/02
Jay is annoyed with Michael who feels that after spending time with her, he's entitled to some alone time - an opinion shared by the marriage counselors they end up seeing. Meanwhile, Jr. wonders why Claire suddenly wants to hang out with him and his friends. - Ep 12Learning to Earn It12/12/01
Michael decides to teach the kids how to handle money due to their inability of spending their allowance money wisely. He proposes that each kid comes up with their own business, and at the end of the week he'll double whatever profit they make. - Ep 11Letting Go11/28/01
Kady has acquired a hamster and Claire has a crush on a boy named Tony. Both developments pose parental challenges for Michael and Jay. The hamster dies and Michael wishes Claire's new beau would follow suit. - Ep 10The Whole World is Watching11/21/01
Jay buys Jr. computer appliances (including a 24-hour broadcast webcam), and Michael protests saying he'll only use it for porno instead of studying. They start to fight over who's in charge, and make up on Jr.'s room, unaware that they're being seen through Jr.'s website by the entire world. The next day, Jr. discovers what his parents did, and seeing the unlimited reach of the internet, Michael decides to use it for promoting his business.moreless - Ep 9Jay Gets Fired11/14/01
The girls' trip to Jay's work isn't quite what they expected but this works out well for Michael. - Ep 8Let Them Eat Pie11/7/01
After playing a game where Claire eats Michael's pie he gets his revenge by only letting them eat pie. Also Michael doesn't plan on sticking to the promise he made to Jay. - Ep 7Michael's Garden10/31/01
Michael has been having problems in the bathroom trouble so has to have a colonoscopy and his troubles aren't eased when he has a strange dream about what may occur... - Ep 6He Heard, She Heard10/24/01
Claire asks her parents to go to a party, but Michael won't let her. Jay thinks he should trust his daughter more, so he lets her spend the night over at Erica's. When he picks up the phone, he 'accidentally' listens to Claire's conversation, where she says she'll fool Michael and go to the party. Michael sets up a scheme to catch her, but Kady overhears it. Claire bribes her sister so she'll page her when Michael leaves the house, but Claire isn't the only one who can bribe...moreless - Ep 5Thru Thick and Thin10/17/01
Jay returns home from taking care of her mom's injury, and she's put on a few pounds after eating mom's home cooking. Michael doesn't know how to 'diplomatically' tell his wife that she's packing a little bit extra. The episode builds to a dream sequence, in which Janet imagines that the entire family is tremendously overweight.moreless - Ep 4Perfect Dad10/10/01
The kids complain that Michael is being too strict since Jay left, so they call for a family meeting where they all discuss the way they think the family should be, with no repercussions. Jr. thinks having a rapper for a dad would be cool, Claire thinks the perfect dad should be the manager of the country's #1 boy band, and Kady thinks Michael should be a big blue dragon (much like TV's Barney). Michael shows them how these versions could go wrong, and shares his thoughts of perfect children.moreless - Ep 3No Rules10/3/01
Michael abandons all house rules after the kids moan which means they must fend for themselves which they initially think is a good idea but not all goes as planned. - Ep 2Mom's Away (2)9/26/01
The pregnancy test was Charmaine's, who is thinking about running away from home. Thanks to Michael's advice on teen parenting, Charmaine decides to talk to her parents about it. Meanwhile, Michael tries to prove to Jr. that his friends are not as friendly as he thinks. Also Michael carries on with the story on Kady's birth.moreless - Ep 1Mom's Away (1)9/26/01
While Jay is away taking care of her mother who broke her leg, Michael is left in charge of the house and the kids. They all miss their mother, and nothing Michael does seems to be as good how Jay did. Jr. wants to join the basketball team. Michael doubts he'll make it, but when he does Michael has other problems to worry about: Jr.'s friends, who seem to be using him. Meanwhile, Kady is cranky and not even Michael's efforts to make cookies just like her mother's are working. Trying to get a smile from her, he starts to tell her how she was born. Claire's friend Charmaine is spending the night over. But the two have bigger worries when a pregnancy test comes out positive.moreless
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Season 1
