Mystery Science Theater 3000

Mike: (after Mowana's dance) And now the traditional viewing of Berlin Alexanderplatz.

Mike: (describing Kermies) Caligula in The Life And Times Of Grizzly Adams.

Crow: (describing Colossus) He looks like he's wearing wing tips and black socks! A look I like.

(as Amoah's men follow Colossus) Crow: Think they fantasize about wearing business suits? Mike: I know I do.

Mike: (as the good guys blithely step over the bodies of their fallen comrades): Oh, don't hop over the bodies! That's so glib!

Tom: (as they leave the theater) Cheesesteak will be back in David Brenner's Soft Pretzels and Mustard!

Crow: (as Colossus fights one of the headhunters) And Bobby 'The Brain' Heenan has 'Wahoo' McDaniel in a deathlock.

Tom: (describing Mowana's dance) Now this will anger the gods.

Mike: (as Colossus sneaks around) We must avoid action at all costs!

Mike: (as Colossus approaches the enemy) Colossus: fearless vagrant.

Aros: (as part of the wedding ceremony) And now you, Kermies... Tom: (imitating Kermit the Frog) Hi ho, Kermies here.

Holybama: From the moment the marriage is celebrated... Mike: It was over.

Kermies: At your feet you would see Amoah. Tom: And a hedge trimmah.

Crow (as Kermies and his army arrive) Isn't it cute the way they're making a stab at a plot?

Kermies: I am marrying Amoah. Mike: A lawn mowah?

Kermies: King Holybama... Crow: With a banjo on his knee.

Tom: (as Colossus is being stalked) It's kinda like a Greco-Roman Deliverance.

Amoah: (about Colossus) Never in my life have I hated anyone like I hate him. Crow: You're in love. You're in love!

Amoah: No one has ever touched my heart. Mike: Everything else, sure, but....

Crow: (as the survivors leave the village) It's a daring lei...surely... es...cape.

Crow: (as the Queen and Colossus walk) Louicus, this could be the start of a beautiful frendshipicus!

Soldier: (to Colossus, who is holding the Queen) Release that woman, stranger! Crow: And let her love again!

Crow: (as Colossus blithely pulls a spear out of his side) Luckily this was before death was invented. Mike: If he had a shirt, it would be an Arrow shirt.

Crow: (as the survivors reach land) Medical waste! We're in Trenton!

Crow: (as two men raise the sail) Oh, ho! Butts ahoy!

Colossus: (to Ariel) It's you who must lead your people. Crow: Ew, I don't wanna lead my people! Eugh!

Crow: Very skinny extras make Colossus look bigger.