Mystery Science Theater 3000

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Comedy Central (ended 1999)

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  • Merlin's Shop of Mystical Wonders

    Full Episode

    S 10 : Ep 13 - 9/12/99

    Pearl gets her first experiment from the institute, and the crew watches Merlin in modern day.

  • Horrors of Spider Island

    Full Episode

    S 10 : Ep 10 - 7/25/99

    A troupe of dancers suffer though a plane crash and wind up on an island where a huge spider terrorizes them. Also, Pearl has the castle moved because she didn't want to pay for a license for Bobo.moreless
  • Hamlet

    Full Episode

    S 10 : Ep 8 - 6/27/99

    Maximillian Schell stars in a West German TV version of Shakespeare's classic tale of madness and murder in Denmark. Mike wins a card game to watch Hamlet but winds up with this version. The 'bots do a bongo version while also trying to prank Mike about dead relatives, but find he has mostly live ones.

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  • Future War

    Full Episode

    S 10 : Ep 3 - 4/25/99

    A 'tool' from the future is chased by a cyborg and a bunch of dinosaurs while the 'bots take LSD as an experiment.
  • Girl in Gold Boots

    Full Episode

    S 10 : Ep 2 - 4/18/99

    Pearl tries to get certified as a mad scientist by sending Mike and the 'bots a movie about a girl who hooks up with a criminal and tries to be a dancer.

  • The Touch of Satan

    Full Episode

    S 9 : Ep 8 - 7/11/98

    While Bobo and Observer have a babysitter, the crew watches a man drawn in to help a witch and Tom's grandma trying to kill Mike.
  • Werewolf

    Full Episode

    S 9 : Ep 4 - 4/18/98

    Movie Plot: Werewolf An author stumbles onto an archeological dig and becomes a werewolf. Intro: Mike hits his head and thinks he's James Lipton from Inside The Actors Studio. He thinks Crow is Ray Liotta and asks him weird questions like whether he smells like apples or not. Segment One: Crow whacks Mike with the clown hammer so he becomes himself again. Then, Mike climbs down a ladder the Nanites made to try and escape, but he winds up in Castle Forrester. The 'bots make insults through the radio, but Mike doesn't hear them. Segment Two: The crew discuss who they would want in their werewolf movie. They turn out to be relatives of famous people(like Joe Estevez), except for Crow, who could only come up with Ray Liotta. Segment Three: After watching the second werewolf crashing his car, Mike and the 'bots do the doo-wop song 'Where, Oh, Werewolf?'(like 'Leader Of The Pack,' get it?) They all dress up in poodle skirts. Segment Four: As they leave the theater, Crow stops short and Mike trips over him. Their essences mingle(ewwwwww!) and Mike becomes a wereCrow. He becomes more and more like Crow through the rest of the movie. Segment Five: Mike is almost fully Crow. Tom has essence of Mike to make Mike normal again, and some of it splashed on to him, making him a wereMike. In the castle, Pearl wants to inject the essence of a wolf into a man. Observer got a peasant, but all Bobo can find is a cocker spaniel. Pearl and Oberver makea hate-Bobo club. Stinger: Natalie says, 'Dis iss absoluuty fahsinattng.' (Translation: 'This is absolutely fascinating.')moreless
  • The Puma Man

    Full Episode

    S 9 : Ep 3 - 4/4/98

    The crew watches the story of a professor who finds out he's a superhero(kind of), while Pearl tries to hold a ball(unsuccesfully) and Roger Whitaker appears.
  • The Phantom Planet

    Full Episode

    S 9 : Ep 2 - 3/21/98

    Movie Plot: The Phantom Planet An astronaut ends up on a planet inhabited by miniature people.

    Intro: The Crew have a contest with their Andy Rooney imitations. Gypsy judges. Segment One: Gypsy never announces the winner because the crew can't stop doing their Andy Rooney. The Doomsday Device Pearl ordered finally arrives. Unfortunately, its radioactive core was sent to the SOL, and the 'bots do not want to part with it. Segment Two: Servo tries to look at good and beautiful things, so he can enjoy life. He has to switch a couple of things. Segment Three: Mike takes a space walk, and the 'bots forget to let him back in. In Castle Forrester, Pearl and Brain Guy discover that the ghostly noises around the castle are actually being made by Bobo. Segment Four: The 'bots play their water glasses and Mike upstages them. Segment Five: Crow thinks he's an alien from the movie and dresses like one. Pearl, doubting her evilness after failing to assemble the Doomsday Device, is cheered up by a mob of villagers. She is going to pour hot oil on them. Turns out, however, that they are just the local welcome wagon. She gives up, but accidentally pours the oil on them.

    Stinger: The "Good and the Beautiful" are extolled.

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  • Time Chasers

    Full Episode

    S 8 : Ep 24 - 11/22/97

    Going back on her 'promise' not to send any more bad movies, Pearl sends one where a geeky computer whiz perfects time travel but has to prevent an evil businessman from using it as a weapon. The 'bots try to go back in time to try and prevent Mike from getting the temp job that led him to the SOL, but wind up getting his mean older brother Eddie to riff with.

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  • Space Mutiny

    Full Episode

    S 8 : Ep 23 - 11/7/97

    The crew watches a giant spaceship going through a mutiny, while Pearl and Observer are about to be killed for not being gods, and Mike helps them escape after Pearl promises she won't send them any more bad movies.moreless
  • Jack Frost

    Full Episode

    S 8 : Ep 14 - 7/12/97

    The crew watches another Russo-Finnish movie while Bobo and Observer argue over who's in charge while Pearl is returning the space children.
  • The Incredibly Strange Creatures That Stopped Living and Became Mixed Up Zombies

    Full Episode

    S 8 : Ep 13 - 6/14/97

    A slacker becomes a killing zombie in the movie with one of the longest titles in history. Also, Pearl returns the space kids.
  • Laserblast

    Full Episode

    S 7 : Ep 8 - 5/18/96

    The Satellite of Love is disconnected from Deep 13 because Dr. Forrester's funding has been cut. As a result, they hurtle toward the edge of the universe and run into various space entities before becoming pure energy. They also watch a movie about a rebel-ish teen who finds a space gun in the desert that makes him kill his enemies.moreless
  • Red Zone Cuba

    Full Episode

    S 6 : Ep 19 - 12/17/94

    Three fugitives wind up in a platoon of mercenaries who attack Cuba, while Mike becomes Carol Channing and Dr. Forrester takes a beating for Frank, who's in for 50 large to the Mob.moreless
  • Zombie Nightmare

    Full Episode

    S 6 : Ep 15 - 11/24/94

    After a man is killed by some joyriding teens, his mother has a voodoo priestess turn him into a zombie to gain vengance on the killers. Also, the Mads start doing voodoo on their own.moreless
  • The Starfighters

    Full Episode

    S 6 : Ep 11 - 10/29/94

    While Crow has trouble getting on the information superhighway and the Mads use their new cranial ports, the crew watches a movie about Air Force pilots training on a new type plane. Watch for a young Bob Dornan as one of the pilots.moreless
  • Beginning of the End

    Full Episode

    S 5 : Ep 17 - 11/25/93

    The crew has to watch giant grasshoppers attack Chicago, while the Mads make the recumbent exercise bike more comfy. Mike presents new playing cards while Crow writes a play totally based on one star's college life and Tom does stand-up comedy totally based on insects.

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  • The Wild World of Batwoman

    Full Episode

    S 5 : Ep 15 - 11/13/93

    Movie Plot: The Wild World of Batwoman Batwoman and her girls thwart the efforts of a mad scientist. Also riffed was the short: "Cheating". Intro: The crew plays blackjack and Crow keeps asking Mike to hit him. Segment One: Frank invents the Atomic Hair Dryer. Mike invents the Razorback, a razor for back hair. Dr. Forrester's hair turns out to be a mushroom cloud. Segment Two: Mike decides to have the 'bots write essays on cheating. Crow is not paying attention. Segment Three: The 'bots present essays on cheating. Crow copies Gypsy's word for word. Tom wants to stone Crow. Segment Four: The rest of the crew tries to decide how to deal with Crow's cheating problem. Tom cries out for severe punishment. Segment Five: Crow takes responsibility for his actions, sort of. Dr. Forrester's new hair causes Frank to run away screaming. Stinger: A batgirl puts the bite on a wormy guy.moreless
  • I Accuse My Parents

    Full Episode

    S 5 : Ep 7 - 9/4/93

    Movie Plot: I Accuse My Parents A teenager's dysfunctional family life leads him into trouble with a night club dancer and the mob. Also riffed was the short: "The Truck Farmer". Intro: Crow paints Servo flesh toned because he has "Pinnochio Syndrome". Segment One: Joel invents an orgainizer for your junk drawer that holds some really odd stuff. In Deep 13, the Mads invent a cake mix that includes an exotic dancer, who is accidentally baked into the cake by Frank. Segment Two: Joel analyzes the 'bots drawings of their ideal families. Segment Three: The crew re-enacts the night club scene from the movie. It goes well until the music stops. Segment Four: The crew tries to find the cause of Jimmy's (the kid in the movie) social illness. They discover he is just stupid. Segment Five: The 'bots try to rob Joel of hamburgers. They get out the heavy artillery to do so. In Deep 13, the exotic dancer from the cake tries to seduce Dr. Forrester. Stinger: Dad laughs at Mother's hat.moreless
  • Eegah

    Full Episode

    S 5 : Ep 6 - 8/28/93

    Movie Plot: Eegah Story of a caveman in modern times. Intro: Servo attempts to freeze Crow to absolute zero. Joel interrupts the experiment and shatters Crow. Segment One: Joel has fixed Crow... sort of. In Deep 13, Dr. Forrester replaces Frank's blood with anti-freeze. Joel invents the Porkarina, which imitates the incidental music from The Beverly Hilbillies. Segment Two: The crew discusses the workings of Hell. They find that Hell is much more subtle than they thought. Segment Three: The 'bots do some disastrous plastic surgery on Joel, to make him look like Arch Hall Jr. from the movie. Segment Four: The crew discusses why all 1960s sitcom families had single dads. They realize that the Munsters were the only normal 60s TV family. Segment Five: The 'bots take showers to try to clean the movie's residue off. Frank wants his blood back. Stinger: Roxy fakes it, at the urging of her dad.moreless
  • Secret Agent Super Dragon

    Full Episode

    S 5 : Ep 4 - 8/7/93

    Another secret agent with cool gadgets, hot women, and an evil villain; plus Dr. Forrester's seminar on super-villainy.
  • Swamp Diamonds

    Full Episode

    S 5 : Ep 3 - 7/31/93

    A Roger Corman movie about searching for diamonds in the swamp, featuring Mike Connors billed as Touch Connors. Also; Tom and Gypsy go on a date which does not go well for him.moreless
  • Manos, The Hands of Fate

    Full Episode

    S 4 : Ep 25 - 1/30/93

    Believed to be the worst movie in the history of the show, the crew endures Manos: The Hands of Fate while making a combiner of funny page strips while the Mads make a chocolate bunny guillotine. Also, the 'bots argue whether or not there is a monster in the movie while the Mads get a delivery from a new pizza place.

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  • Monster A-Go-Go

    Full Episode

    S 4 : Ep 22 - 1/9/93

    Movie Plot: Monster A-Go-Go The search for an astronaut on an alien planet. Also riffed was the short: Circus on Ice.

    Intro: The 'bots start a micro-cheese factory. Joel is given a tour. Segment One: Joel's shoes are covered in cheese. Dr. Forrester decides to have an action hero competition: if they win, the crew watches Local Hero; if they lose, they get Monster A-Go-Go. Frank is the judge. The Mads' 'Johnny Longtorso' doll is presented in many separate pieces, to get more money. The 'bots present non-violent action figures. Frank calls the Mads the winner. Segment Two: Gypsy doesn't 'get' Crow. He tries to help, but she can't pinpoint what it is. She realizes that maybe it's Tom she doesn't get. Segment Three: Joel and Tom play keep-away from Crow. He does catch it in his net, but they get another ball. Joel throws a hail mary when movie sign calls. Tom catches it on the top of his dome in the theater. Segment Four: After getting all his chores done, Joel asks the 'bots what questions they have. They ask about the plausibility of the Pina Colada Song. Joel just says it was about two popular things. Segment Five: To try and cheer up the bots, Joel makes Tom a happy king and Crow his jester, Sir Giggles Von Laughs-A-Lot. It does not go well. Dr. F. gloats about their plight until Frank mentions a Matlock marathon on TV.

    Stinger: Monsters on the go go.moreless
  • The Rebel Set

    Full Episode

    S 4 : Ep 20 - 12/12/92

    Three beatniks help a con artist rob an armored car, while the crew ponders what to do in Chicago.
  • The Beatniks

    Full Episode

    S 4 : Ep 16 - 11/26/92

    Movie Plot: The Beatniks A promising young singer gets in with the wrong crowd and murders a guy. Also riffed was an old episode of: "General Hospital". Intro: The crew plays Rock/Paper/Scissors. Segment One: The Mads dress as trolls to try to get women. Segment Two: Joel and the 'bots discuss the symptoms of beatnickness. Segment Three: The 'bots have a slumber party. Segment Four: Segment Five: Stinger:moreless
  • Tormented

    Full Episode

    S 4 : Ep 14 - 9/26/92

    Movie Plot: Tormented A pianist is haunted by the ghost of his ex-girlfriend, who he murdered.

    Intro: Servo and Crow make a fortSegment One: Joel invents a wheel of sayings to get you through a family reunion. The Mads create a jacket custom fitted for alcoholics. Segment Two: Joel gets blackmailed by the 'bots Segment Three: The crew pushes their least favorite singers from a lighthouse a la the murder scene in the movie Segment Four: Servo and Crow accuse Joel of killing them. Segment Five: Frank sings a song about happiness which is cut short by Dr. Forrester throwing a grenade at him.

    Stinger: "Tom Stewart killed me!"moreless
  • Hercules Against the Moonmen

    Full Episode

    S 4 : Ep 10 - 8/22/92

    Movie Plot: Hercules Against the Moonmen Hercules is sent to stop an evil force in a mountain that has been demanding sacrifices.Intro: Crow and Servo run away to the other side of the ship. They get in a fight and come back almost immediately. Segment One: Dr. Forrester invents 'Deep Hurting' which, of couse, Frank is forced to experience. Joel and the 'bots invent Super Freak Out. Segment Two: The Crew does the knife trick from the movie. Segment Three: Joel gives Crow and Tom Alan Steel-type arms and they think of cool tough guy names. Eventually, Tom's body rejects his new arms. Segment Four: The crew lament about the lack of pants in the movie, then sing the famous pants song. Frank joins in, but is caught by Dr. F and experiences the sandstorm and Deep Hurting. Segment Five: Crow explains Wayne Rogers Syndrome, where he replaces actors in TV versions of movies, then he acts up and gets a time-out, leaving Tom to read a letter. Dr. Forrester wonders why the movie didn't break the crew. Frank wonders what it would be like to be up there, and gets Deep Hurting. Stinger: An old guy gets skewered.moreless
  • Indestructible Man

    Full Episode

    S 4 : Ep 9 -

    In Indestructible Man, a violent criminal named Butcher Benson is executed and becomes indestructible when he's brought back to life. Butcher seeks revenge against those who caused his execution.
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