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Kunihisa: Look daddy, look.
Kunijirou: What is it son?
Kunihisa: See how it sparkles in the sun.
Kunijirou: All that glitters is not gold. It's just a marble, it has no value.
Kunihisa: Not in money, no. But daddy...maybe it has a different kind of value just because it's pretty.
(Naruto knocks the two would be kidnappers into the river)
Kunihisa: Huh? What's going on?
Naruto: Man, you are one high maintenance kid, aren't you. You don't know how close you came to having those two goons grab you.
Kunihisa: Oh, it was just another kidnapping attempt, that's all.
Naruto: Huh? Just another what?
Kunihisa: It happens all the time 'cause I'm stinkin' rich.
Naruto: Are you like this all the time? How do you make friends with an attitude like that?
Kunihisa: How do you think? (Waves a wad of money) It's easy.
Naruto: So what you're saying is you buy your friends?
Kunihisa: Sure. And when I lose one, I just buy another.
Kunihisa: Go on, get out of here. You're not even good for sausages, you big fat tub of lard. (The pig becomes very angry) Wait, it's all his fault. He made me... (Points at Naruto)
Kunihisa: He made me do it. I don't even eat pork.
Naruto: (Reading list) I've got to clean the pond, repair the bridge, take care of the feral pig... Oh boy.... (Kunihisa is giggling) And now I get to add babysitting to my list of D-ranked missions.
Naruto: What is this? I thought I was escorting an important V.I.P.?
Tsunade: Well that's your problem. I never told you it was an important V.I.P., now did I?
Naruto: What a dirty rotten tri-
Tsunade: That's enough, Naruto! Your mission is to play ninja for a day.
Naruto: What the...? This is so not fair!
Kunijirou: So you're the one.
Kunijirou: You really don't mind if my little boy tags along with you and plays ninja for a day? Can't tell you how grateful I am.
Naruto: Did you say he wants to play ninja for a day?
Kunijirou: It's an obsession. He's wild about anything ninja. You should hear him, ninja ninja ninja, all day long.
Naruto: What-what-what?! You really mean it?! No kidding?!
Tsunade: Will you calm down?!
Naruto: Okay, sorry about that. Right, okay, I'm fine now.
Kunihisa: Look daddy, look at this marble.
Kunijirou: What about it son?
Kunihisa: It's just as pretty and sparkly as a diamond, isn't it.
Kunijirou: Why, so it is. You're right.
Kunihisa: But a diamond is valuable and this is totally worthless. Why is that? (Kunijirou doesn't know how to respond) Life's funny, isn't it daddy.
Tsunade: This is an important person, and I could think of no one better for the job than you.
Naruto: At last! I'm finally going to get a mission worthy of my awesome abilities! It's everything I've dreamed of, being the escort of a real V.I.P.
Tsunade: Will you shut up for one second and LISTEN?!
Naruto: Hey, watch it! You're dripping on me!
Kunihisa: (Crying) I can't help it.
Naruto: I'm drowning here! Use a hankie or something, please!
Naruto: What are you waiting for? An engraved invitation? Go ahead and jump!
Naruto: Listen to you. You've got it stuck in your head that money's gonna solve everything.
Kunihisa: I bet you don't have a lot of money, right? Poor people lose their tempers a lot.
Naruto: (Mumbling) Serve 'em right if I left them all here to drown.
Naruto: What's going on, grandma? Why are you doing this to me? Why?!
Kunihisa: Are you a ninja?
Naruto: I don't think I liked the way you asked that question.
Naruto: I'm all fired up and ready to go!
Naruto: All right, watch me Kunihisa! I'll teach you how great ninja are!
(Builds up chakra and walks on water)
Kunihisa: Amazing Naruto! Amazing Naruto
Naruto: Well, you know, I hate people like you.
Kunihisa: Why are you so angry? Jeez, poor people shouldn't be so short-tempered.
Kunihisa: Okay Naruto, it's my turn now!
Naruto: You fool! Hurry up and run away!
Naruto: What's the point of making more victims?
Tsunade: Listen to me seriously!
Naruto: Yes ma'am.
Naruto: Finally... Finally a mission that fits my true skills has come! VIP bodyguard?! That has a nice ring to it!
Naruto: My self-motivation has exploded! (A "Volcano" explodes behind him) I'll do it! I'll take the mission!
Naruto: So this is just a normal D-rank mission with additional tasks.
Naruto: Even if you don't use any money, you can get things by yourself if you use your own power.
Naruto: With a personality like that, you won't be able to make any friends!
Kunihisa: You can buy friends with money.
Naruto: You mean... You buy friends...?
Kunihisa: As long as I give them money, they will be my friends.
YTV Airdate: February 28, 2009
Original Airdate: March 1, 2006
Original Episode Title: No Waaaay! Celebrity Element: Jutsu of Gold
Romaji Episode Title: Arieneettebayo! Serebu Ninpou: Kinton no Jutsu
Kanji Episode Title: ありえねーってばよ！セレブ忍法・金遁の術
This episode deals with the moral, "Money can't buy you happiness!".
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