Nash Bridges

Season 3 Episode 13

Crossfire

0
Aired Friday 10:00 PM Jan 09, 1998 on CBS
9.3
out of 10
User Rating
14 votes
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Episode Summary

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Crossfire
AIRED:
A million dollar bounty on Nash's head triggers an onslaught of attacks by a series of ultimate fighters. Michelle meets "Mr. Right" while on a stake out trying to trackdown an Internet rapist. Nash is convinced Cassidy's new boyfriend in gay.

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SUBMIT REVIEW
  • man.. action and funny what is more better then that?

    10
    I like this episode cuz it has action in it and the story line was just perfect. Funny too. buddy cop shows that are action and funny are the best. The mini stories of each episode of each week were great on there own. But the show didnt work as a whole because the stories didnt flow into the next. But i do love action/comdey/and everything in between.

Trivia, Notes, Quotes and Allusions

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  • TRIVIA (0)

  • QUOTES (22)

    • (Cassidy is leaving the house with Paul and Steve)
      Joe: I'm still waiting.
      Nash: For what?
      Joe: Like who's with who.
      Nash: Ah, ah. I don't want to think about it. Bubba, I'm thinkin' my gaydar's busted.
      Joe: Yeah. More juice?
      Nash: Want some vodka in it?
      Joe: Yep.

    • Nash (about Louis): He's got Kaiser. He wants me to come alone.
      Joe: Don't tell me you're gonna do that.
      Nash: What are you, crazy? There's no rules to this ultimate fighting thing, bubba.

    • (Nash and Joe are sitting on Louis' porch drinking tea while people remove things from his house)
      Nash: Hi, Louis. Welcome.
      Joe: Mi casa es su casa, amigo.
      Louis: What the hell are you doing here? (someone hands him papers) What is this?
      Nash: I believe that would be an eviction notice. (seeing a worker walking by with a naked painting) Oh, very nice. Kinda like a caligula thing.
      Becca: I demand to know on what basis this is actionable.
      Nash: It turns out, that you and your brother have been operating a business here improperly for years.
      Joe: Yeah, see, this area is not zoned for business.
      Nash: Oh, not to mention the commercial space permits, and the business license.
      Joe: Occupancy permits, and uh, insurance clearances, things like that.
      Nash: Oh, you had about ten fire code violations. (points to a red tag someone just put up) And that's not good. It appears that you've been red tagged for seismic retrofitting.
      Joe: Hey, don't worry, with a good lawyer like your sister, you'll clear this up in two to three years. (Nash and Joe start walking away)
      Louis: You think you can beat me Bridges?
      Nash: Yeah. (they walk onto the street where Louis' car is being towed away) Yeah, that's it, boys. Take it away.
      Louis: What are you doing with my car?
      Nash: Oh, impounding it. Drug seizure. (holds up a pill bottle) We found these in the glove compartment.
      Becca: Those are perscription.
      Joe: Ah, we called the pharmacy.
      Nash (laughs): They're not yours, makes 'em illegal.
      Joe: Hey, you might be eligible for rehab. (they walk across the street to Joe's car)
      Louis: You want to play, Bridges, I'll play.
      Nash: Good. Only this time, just remember, now you're playing on my game board. As soon as I complete my investigation, I'm gonna have your ass for conspiracy to commit murder. Third strike. No parole, back in the car.
      Joe (hands Louis a ticket): Here you go.
      Louis: What's this?
      Joe: Uh, you just jaywalked across the street.
      Nash: Oh! One more thing. (to Becca) You're going to be hearing from the California Bar Association.
      Joe: Something about improper conduct.
      Nash: See 'ya.
      Joe: Wouldn't want to be 'ya.

    • Nash: Let's see how best do I put this? Well, you know I'm a cop, right? (Paul nods) And I meet a lot of people and I like to think that I'm-- I'm a pretty good judge of people and their character. Uh... Could I make an observation?
      Paul: Oh, of course.
      Nash: Have you ever considered that you might be gay?
      Paul: What?
      Nash: Gay. Now I'm not trying to embarrass 'ya and I grew up in San Francisco, so it's not an issue for me. And I understand that this is a hell of a city to be gay. So I think what I'm sayin' is the sooner you come to terms with it, the better you're gonna feel. My problem is that you're dating my daughter and I'm thinkin' that she's in love with you and that means sooner or later one or both of your hearts is gonna get broken. I'd like to not see that happen.
      Paul (stunned): I-I see.
      Nash: Think about that before you go to New York, okay?

    • Louis: I told you to come alone, Bridges.
      Nash: I cheated.

    • Joe: You know, Nashman, it's a real fine line between being protective and being intrusive.
      Nash: I'm just being a responsible parent.
      Joe: Yeah, I know. Take J.J, I mean, he brought home some weird chicks. I mean, pink hair, pierced tongue, one girl even lived in her car. But I didn't say anything and it worked out fine. You just gotta give it time.
      Nash: So you're saying if I just stand back it'll play out?
      Joe: Yeah. You could give yourself the same advice you always give me. Butt out.
      Nash: Not an option.
      Joe: You know, she's spent more time with this guy than you have. If he's gay, I'm sure she would have figured it out by now.
      Nash: Yeah, why hasn't she? And for that matter, why hasn't he? (gets his phone out and dials)
      Joe: Who you callin'?
      Nash: Cassidy.
      Joe: You haven't heard a word I said, have you?
      Nash: Relax, I'm going to call and apologize.

    • Joe: What is wrong with kids today?
      Nash: Parents.
      Joe: I mean, why can't they be like I was? Perfect in every way. (Nash laughs)

    • Becca: I hope you have a warrant for this violating intrusion.
      Nash: Well, I have a warning. You better start using your head, or I'm gonna take it off.
      Becca: Are you threatening me?
      Nash: I don't know. Joe, am I threatening her?
      Joe: Hmm. Sounded like it to me.
      Nash: Well, there you have it. I guess I was. You've been tryin' to kill me, sister. All bets are off.

    • Cassidy: What happened to your table?
      Nash: Ah, I brought a little work home from the office. What's up?
      Cassidy: Well, I knew you'd be up late and this is kind of dying at mom's so I thought I'd bring it to you. (hands Nash a plant)
      Joe: It'll be safe here as long as it doesn't get shot.
      Cassidy: So, Daddy, what did you think of Paul?
      Nash: Paul...
      Joe: I liked him. (Nash glares at him)
      Nash: You know, Paul is a conversation I don't want to have on the fly and I'm kind of rushed right now, so can we talk about this later?
      Cassidy: Yeah, that's fine. I'll be back from New York on Monday.
      Nash: Whoa, whoa, whoa, wait a minute.
      Cassidy: Daddy, I'm not looking for your approval here. I was just hoping that you'd like him.
      Nash: Oh, Cassidy...
      Cassidy: Oh, but why should you? You never like any of my boyfriends.
      Nash: That's not true. I liked uh, um, uh... (looks to Joe for help, Joe shrugs) That, uh-- Oh, what was--
      Cassidy: Matt?
      Nash: Matt. Matt. I liked Matt. What happened to him?
      Cassidy: He fell in love with Sharon Scomer.
      Nash: Wow, she's lucky, huh?
      Cassidy: What's wrong with Paul? He's good looking, he's got a job, he likes me.
      Nash: He's gay.
      Cassidy: What? (shows Joe mouthing the words in the background before Nash says them)
      Nash: He's gay.
      Cassidy: Ah, no, daddy, you're kidding, just because he's good looking? No. You're out of touch.
      Nash: Am I?
      Cassidy: Paul is not gay.
      Nash: How do you know?
      Cassidy: What are you saying? Have I slept with him?
      Nash: I would never bring that up in a million years, but since you have, have you?
      Cassidy: That is none of your business. You're impossible. (starts walking away)
      Nash: Why because I care about you? And I care about what happens to you?
      Cassidy: Do me a favor, don't.
      Nash (still holding the plant Cassidy gave him): Shoulda had plants.

    • Nash: Is that my last yogurt?
      Joe: Yeah, is that a problem? (Nash's phone rings, and he takes a call, then hangs up)
      Nash: Is that my last apple?
      Joe: I'll buy you lunch tomorrow.
      Nash: Yes, you will.

    • Joe: Well, the deal is you had no business telling her she can't go to New York.
      Nash: I don't give a damn if she goes to New York. That's not my concern.
      Joe: Okay, what is your concern then?
      Nash: Did you notice somethin' special about Paul?
      Joe: He seemed like a nice kid, smelled good. What?
      Nash: He's gay.
      Joe: What?
      Nash: He's gay.
      Joe: Come on.
      Nash: Oh, come on, man. He used the word fabulous about ten thousand times, he has this unbalanced love for musicals. And uh, how about his hair? Did you see his hair?
      Joe (laughs): He has gay hair?
      Nash: Oh, man. How about the way he checked out the waiter?
      Joe: So what? It was a hot lookin' waiter. Hey, I checked him out, too. That doesn't make me gay, does it?
      Nash: I cannot believe you didn't get this.
      Joe: Nashman, it's San Francisco, man. Who can tell anymore? I mean, straights dress like gays, gays dress like straights, you know?
      Nash: I grew up in San Francisco, bubba. I can tell you, if a person is gay in about a half of second.
      Joe: Well, people think we're gay.
      Nash: No, people don't think we're gay. Pepe thinks we're gay.
      Joe: Yeah, well, he's gay. So he should have pretty good gaydar, right?
      Nash: Ah, that's pretty good. But I can't tell you about anybody else's equipment. I can tell you that, that guy is gay.
      Joe: Should make him the perfect travel companion then.
      Nash: That's not the point. Cassidy has obviously fallen in love with this guy and I'd like to cut it off at the pass before they both get hurt.
      Joe: Why would Cassidy fall in love with a gay guy? Why wouldn't he tell her he was gay?
      Nash: Maybe he doesn't know he's gay.
      Joe: Well, if he doesn't know, how do you know?
      Nash: Ahh!

    • Nash: Can we get back to this New York thing? This is cra-- Where you staying?
      Cassidy: Well, Paul's good friend is the concierge at the SoHo Grand. He's giving us a deal.
      Nash: Oh, this is great. Two rooms, huh?
      Cassidy: Daddy.
      Nash: Daughter.
      Cassidy: If I was at college right now, I'd be in a co-ed dorm.
      Joe: Ah, she's got a point there. (Nash glares at him)

    • Louis: In here we settle our disputes man to man, Inspector.
      Nash: Well, out here, I settle my differences by winning them.

    • (Seeing Nash's bounty website)
      Nash: Oh, well, that's cute.
      Joe: Hey, you got your own website.
      Harvey: It's the numerical equivalent of KillNashBridges.com. What's goin' on here? (Nash's bounty goes up to 1.2 million)
      Joe: Bubba, your bounty just went up, hey!
      Nash: That's really good news.
      Joe: Good picture of 'ya.

    • Joe (trying to figure out what a set of numbers mean): Swiss bank account?
      Nash: A poultry farmer with a Swiss bank account?
      Joe: Makes as much sense as a poultry farmer trying to kill us with a monster truck.
      Nash: He's got a point there.

    • Joe: So, what's the story on this guy anyways?
      Nash: He as vague. He did say Joey Robino would be involved, so I figured it was worth a chat.
      Joe: Joey Robino the rubicon rackets guy?
      Nash: That's what he said.
      Joe: Oh. Who's 'he'?
      Nash: He. He's the guy who called me.
      Joe: You don't even know this guy?
      Nash: I know we're practically married, but let's lose the nagging thing, okay?
      Joe: Just curious.

    • (Nash and Joe are sitting in the 'cuda and a guy with an axe is approaching them)
      Nash: Joe. Guy with an axe. (the guy puts the axe into Nash's hood) Son of a bitch! This is war you bastard! (they get outta the car)
      Joe: You want me to shoot him?
      Nash: No, no, no. He might be able to tell us something. We don't need another dead witness. (the guy gets closer to Joe, he's carrying another axe)
      Joe: I think maybe I better shoot him.
      Nash: Joe. Paul Bunyon, hello?! Put the axe, down there's no more bounty. (the guy starts coming over to Nash) Put the axe down nimrod, I'm trying to save your life. (Nash pepper sprays him and he falls to the ground)
      Joe: Timber.
      Nash (leaning down to look at his hood): You bastard! Do you know how hard it is to find original factory parts for a '71 'cuda?! (the guy is crying because of the pepper spray) That's right, cry! It's very sad!

    • (Nash and Joe arrive at Nash's house to find two guys beating each other up)
      Joe: You wanna break this up?
      Nash: Huh. Not praticularly. I say let's just let 'em blow off a little steam, settle their arguement. (they go and sit on the steps and watch the two guys)
      Joe: Usually when I see and ulitimate fight in the living room its a pay-per-view deal. (something breaks)
      Nash: Bubba, it looks like I'm gonna be paying for this too.
      Joe: Uh, the big guy's got it.
      Nash: Are you kiddin' me? I got the little guy ahead on points.
      Joe: Five bucks?
      Nash: You're on. (they break Nash's coffee table) All right, we better do our thing. Come on.
      Joe: You first.
      Nash (to the guy's fighting): Let him up, netural corners. (the guy turns around to punch Nash and Nash hits him with his gun) What are you crazy? This is a gun! (to the other guy, handing him cuffs) Here you go. Buckle up.
      Joe: Nash! (Nash turns to see a guy throwing a knife, the guy hits Joe's jacket pinning Joe to the wall and Nash shoots the guy, and then he goes to get the knife outta Joe's jacket)
      Nash: Damn! Where the hell are these guys coming from? (Joe sees the guy get back up)
      Joe: Groundhog day! (he points, Nash turns and shoots the guy again)
      Nash: Groundhog day?
      Joe: Well, you got it.

    • (Someone is under Nash's car)
      Nash: Why is my car wearing shoes?
      Joe: Ah, maybe he's a good samartian and stop by to change your oil.
      Nash: Nah, I don't think so. (goes over to his car, and looks under it) Yo, Mr. Goodwrech you wanna come on outta there? (he tries to slide out the otherside but Joe's there)
      Joe: You do smog checks too? (he tries to go back toward Nash and Nash grabs an ankle)
      Nash: Joe, come over here and grab an ankle. (they pull him out and Nash kicks the board away, and the guy does kung fu)
      Joe: Go ahead, throw a punch. I'll throw a bullet.
      Nash: Now you don't wanna get into the ulitmate-ulitmate fight bubba.
      Joe: Put your hands on your head.
      Nash: Now. (the guy runs and jumps on the board Nash kicked away, he's going straight downhill into on coming traffic, towards an intersection) Uh-oh. Now that's not a smart move there.
      Joe: You think that thing has brakes on it?
      Nash: No.
      Joe: You think he's gonna stop before he gets down to the--
      Nash: No. (hearing car horns honking and a crash) Oh, I hope he has good HMO.

    • (Cassidy wants Nash to meet her boyfriend)
      Joe: Ah, must be gettin' serious.
      Nash: She's 19.
      Joe: Uh, weren't you engaged at 19?
      Nash: Don't push my buttons.
      Joe: But I'm so good at it.

    • (Some guy called Nash telling him to meet him somewhere. They go there and a guy in a monster truck is trying to kill them so they're in the cuda trying to evade him)
      Joe: I'm thinking this is a setup!
      Nash: Very, good guess Joe. Try and shoot out his tires before he puts skidmarks on our foreheads.
      Joe: Nash, this guy has us pinned in here.
      Nash: Any ideas?
      Joe: Yeah, I'm thinkin' next time meet this guy at a coffee shop. (they evade him enough, so the stop the car and get out)
      Nash: Let's go give this guy a ticket.

    • (Nash and Joe go after a guy who attacked them with a monster truck)
      Joe: Can't we take a bigger car? Or a bus?

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