Nash Bridges

Season 3 Episode 12

Dirty Tricks

Aired Friday 10:00 PM Dec 19, 1997 on CBS
out of 10
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Episode Summary

Nash and Joe risk causing an international incident after British consulate workers fake the death of a convicted killer in order to use him for their own nefarious purposes. Joe resorts to extreme measures in order to get Lucia accepted into an ultra-elite school.

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    Neil Dickson

    Neil Dickson

    David Laughton Adams

    Guest Star

    Colman Domingo

    Colman Domingo

    Reggie Harrell

    Guest Star

    Cliff Emmich

    Cliff Emmich


    Guest Star

    Ronald Russell (I)

    Ronald Russell (I)

    Officer Ronnie

    Recurring Role

    Caroline Lagerfelt

    Caroline Lagerfelt

    Inger Dominguez

    Recurring Role

    Trivia, Notes, Quotes and Allusions


    • TRIVIA (0)

    • QUOTES (9)

      • Joe: Hey, besides, me and you went to public schools, and we both turned out okay, right?
        Nash: Ahhh...
        Joe: Right?
        Nash: Ah, I'm thinking. I'm thinking. So what are you gonna tell Inger?
        Joe: Are you kidding? I'm going to tell her the truth. She'll be delighted. Hey, listen, question.
        Nash: Uh huh.
        Joe: Piano lessons.
        Nash: Technically that's not a question.
        Joe: No, I mean, how soon is too soon?
        Nash: Aren't Lucia's hands a little small to be thinking about that right now?
        Joe: Ah, not right now, but you know.
        Nash: Well, here's a radical idea. Why don't you wait until she's old enough and then you can ask her yourself?
        Joe: Are you kidding? What's the good of having kids if you can't live their lives for 'em? (Nash laughs)

      • Joe: I hate this.
        Nash: What?
        Joe: We can find a fugitive in a state with 33 million people but I can't one little girl into Tufnil school.
        Nash: Have you considered a convent?
        Joe: Nah, I'm married.

      • Joe: In-Inger, wh-wha-- How--
        Inger: Complete sentences, Joe. This is the Tufnil school.
        Nash: Uh, well, he was tryin' to reach 'ya.
        Inger: I know. 37 calls? Are you okay? You look a little bit pale.
        Joe: I do? (Inger nods) That's not good, huh? (Joe pinches his cheeks, trying to get color in them)
        Nash: I gotta write this down. Memoirs.

      • Joe: Hey, Irv, how 'ya doin'?
        Irv: I'm not answerin', not without a lawyer. I don't have to answer.
        Nash: You don't need a lawyer to say how you're doin', Irv.
        Irv: I'm a legitimate, international talent agent. I never engaged in any of my former partners criminality.
        Nash: He said that with a straight face. (laughs) You're just bringing nations together.
        Joe: Tell me, Irv. At what point do the girls go from being talent to hookers? Like right after take off or do they have to pass Hawaii first?
        Nash: No, no. You have to cross the international date line.

      • Nash: What is it with you?
        Joe: Hey, man, I just want Lucia to have the best shot at life, y'know? An education is the best shot. You know, what's wrong with that?
        Nash: Bubba, with or without the Tufnil school she's gonna do just fine. She's gonna be a lot richer than you think. She's got you.

      • Joe: Hey, we don't have a letter of recommendation.
        Inger: It's optional.
        Joe: Well, don't you think we should put our best foot forward?
        Inger: Lucia is a baby. What are we going to say, hmm? That she eats strained peas better than her friends?
        Joe: Look, honey, they're giving us an opportunity to let Lucia stand out as special. I think we should do it. Besides, she is special.

      • Joe: Hey, Nashman.
        Nash: What's this?
        Joe: Uh, I need you to sign this.
        Nash: What is it?
        Joe: It's a letter of recommendation from you to me, to the academic board of Tufnil school.
        Nash (laughs): Oh, that's good. I wonder what I had to say.
        Joe: Well, I know how busy you are, and I didn't want you to waste your time, so uh, I just need a signature right there.
        Nash (signing the paper): What school requires a recommendation for a nine month old?
        Joe: Well, you obviously had it pretty easy with Cassidy.

      • Joe: We are in, baby.
        Inger: Joe, it's only an interview.
        Nash: That's what I said.
        Inger: It doesn't mean that she's been accepted.
        Nash: That's what I said.
        Joe: What are you talking about? Who could say no to this little angel?
        Inger: Joe, are you sure that this is the right thing for Lucia? (Nash makes a face) What? You thought that this was my idea?
        Nash: I-I didn't say anything.
        Inger: Nash, why do you always think that these ideas are my ideas, huh? I think Lucia will do fine in a public school.
        Joe: Honey, we've been all through this.
        Inger: What do you think, Nash?
        Nash: Oh, no, no, no, no, no. Think of me as Switzerland.
        Joe: Oh, I get it. A public school is good enough for my daughter, but your daughter had to go to a private school? I get it.
        Nash: No, no. I didn't say that.
        Joe: You didn't have to.
        Nash: Joe, I am sure that no matter where your daughter goes to school, she's gonna do great.
        Inger: You see?
        Joe: Oh, so now you're taking his side?
        Nash: I'm not talking anymore. (doorbell rings) That's for me.

      • Joe: I have the letter.
        Nash: What letter?
        Joe: The letter.
        Nash: What letter? (reading the envelope Joe handed him) The Tufnil School. What does that mean?
        Joe: Only the most exclusive preschool in the city.
        Nash: What are you thinking of furthering your education, bubba?
        Joe: Ha. Very funny. I happen to be holding Lucia's future right here in my little hands.
        Nash: Let's see, Lucia would be what, nine months old?
        Joe: Uh huh. Which means I should've been on the gig 18 months ago, man. Look, there's only 24 spots in the school and there's thousands of people trying to get their kids in. Hell, I had to make a donation just to get the application.
        Nash: And this school frenzy thing, this doesn't strike you as a little bit ridiculous?
        Joe: Man, if she doesn't get into the Tufnil preschool, the top feeding school for the elementary and secondary schools in the country, forget it. She has no chance of getting into an Ivy league college.
        Nash: So what you're saying is if she doesn't get into this school, her future is pretty much over.
        Joe: No, not pretty much over. It is over.
        Nash: How you gonna break it to her?
        Joe: In another language. (Nash laughs)

    • NOTES (1)

    • ALLUSIONS (0)

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