Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs
Special Agent Kate Todd
Special Agent Tony DiNozzo
Forensics Specialist Abby Sciuto
Special Agent Tim McGee
Chief M.E. Ducky Mallard
Marine Sgt. William Moore
Marine Sgt. Roger Caine
Asst. M.E. Jimmy Palmer
GOOF: When Abby whilst in her lab is wearing her funny blue hat, and says to Kate, 'Cool, well, I made you one,' who can see that in the frame, her lips aren't moving. The audio was obviously taken from another shot.
GOOF: McGee gets poison ivy because he apparently don't know how to recognize it. But in another episode, he tells the team that he was a boy scout, well versed enough in the outdoors to track animal behavior. It is extremely unlikely that he couldn't identify something as common as poison ivy.
GOOF: When Runion's trailer first blows up, the trailer is still largely intact, just covered in flames. But in all the later shots, the trailer is almost completely destroyed.
GOOF: When Tony and McGee show Caine the piece of video where Moore caught him and Moore's wife, they show it on a mobile phone. But in the shot where the camera is behind Caine, you can see that they just show the menu of the mobile phone. Apparently the video is edited in the scene after shooting the scene itself.
GOOF: At the end when Abby and Kate are tending to the dog, in one shot it's standing on the table, and in the other it's sitting.
GOOF: In the morgue when McGee is taking off his dress shirt, you can see the cameraman and his camera reflected in the metal sliding door of the autopsy bay.
GOOF: In the beginning of the episode, the time counter of the camera is increasing until 1:05:22, then suddenly jumps back to 1:05:21.
Ducky: It's the urushiol oil in the plant. Yes, once it gets on your hands, it spreads by contact.
McGee: Um, then I have a major problem, Ducky. (Ducky raises his eyebrows) When I was out there, I had to... you know...
Ducky: No, I don't.
McGee: Relieve myself.
Ducky: Oh. (pauses) Ooohhh... Well, let's take a look, then.
(McGee slides off the examining table and starts unfastening his pants)
McGee: This is, um, this is kind of embarrassing.
Ducky: I'm a doctor, McGee, I have seen everything there is to see more times than I care to remember... Good lord!
McGee: What?! What, is it bad?!
Ducky: No, no, it's fine, fine. (laughs nervously) Nothing to worry about. I didn't expect to see quite so much... swelling.
McGee: If Tony finds out about this, I'm going to have to quit.
Ducky: Well, your secret is safe with me.
(Jimmy walks in the autopsy room)
Jimmy: Doctor, I've got the new inspection forms you re... (looks at Ducky and McGee) ... I'll come back. (turns and walks back out)
Ducky: Him, I'm not so sure about.
Tony: Nice hat.
McGee: In a weird way.
Abby: Somebody did a Barry Bonds on Sgt. Moore's head Gibbs.
(looking around the camper)
Gibbs: What do you think?
Kate: The word disgusting comes to mind.
Gibbs: Do you smell that?
Kate: If you mean the urine, then yes.
Tony: You're a Spike Steel fan aren't you, Probie?
McGee: The porn star?
Tony: (Sarcastically) No, the physicist.
Kate: Ugh, you're disgusting!
Tony: I wasn't the one having a conversation about kinky sex, Kate.
Kate: It was a private conversation, Tony. Something you seem to have a difficult time with.
Tony You know what I think, Kate? I think there's a secret side to you. A Spike Steel video kind of side. Do you keep it hidden under your matress?
Kate: (points to Tony's desk) Leave. Now.
McGee: (About the poison ivy on his face) So, how bad is it?
Abby: Umm... Would you prefer the truth or a lie... to... lessen the weight of your own self loathing.
McGee: I'd actually prefer the lie.
Abby: Me too. You're the fairest in the land, McGee.
Tony: Still think men and women can just be friends Kate?
Kate: And my mother wonders why I'm not married.
Tony: So does mine.
Runion: Got a medical condition.
Gibbs: What? Stupidity?
Tony: Leaves of three let them be McGee.
Tony: Well, it is kinda weird a single guy hanging out with a married couple.
McGee: I agree.
Kate: Why is that?
Tony: Well because he's a single guy... hanging out with married people.
Kate: I do that all the time.
Tony: Yeah, but you bring a date right?
Kate: Not always.
McGee: Are you related to them?
Kate: No. (Tony and McGee look at each other) What?
Tony: Well who usually invites you?
McGee: The woman or the man?
Kate: I dunno. I guess usually the guy...
Ducky: My coroner friend in Los Angeles says coyotes take it to go. They're very strange in Los Angeles.
Kate: Well I wouldn't put it in my romantic column Deb. It's definitely kinky. Maybe affectionately odd but I don't find anything romantic about having sex with .. (turns and sees Tony) Um, I'll call you back later.
Tony: Sex with a what? Another woman? Another man? Some kind of root vegetable?
Tony: Hurry up, McGee!
McGee: You could have helped.
Tony: I did. I carried the camera.
Kate: Do you think he did it, Gibbs?
Gibbs: Oh, yeah. And Tony is cleaning it up. (dials his phone) Janitorial, don't worry about interrogation. DiNozzo's gonna handle it. You still here?
Tony: (realizing Runion peed in interrogation as he threatened) Are you serious? You're serious? (Gibbs stands up) In my defense, I did use the word 'creepy' in the most affectionate way. Right. (walks away)
Kate: You might wanna use gloves.
(trying to read the lips of the people on the video)
(Gibbs slaps Tony upside the head with the remote)
Tony: Ow! I wish you'd stop doing that.
Gibbs: I will, when you stop blanking up.
Tony: I'll take it. I've always wanted a dog. (the dog snarls and snaps at his hand)
Kate: Good dog. I think I'll call you Tony.
Gibbs: It's a bitch, Kate.
Kate: I know.
(Tony is listening in on the conversation)
Kate: Is it just me, or do you think Tony likes me?
Abby: I think it's more than obvious Tony likes you.
Kate: Not my usual type, but kind of cute.
Abby: More like adorable! Maybe we can share Tony. (Tony the dog barks)
Gibbs: (as he comes in the bullpen) What are you waiting for DiNozzo?
Gibbs: Gas the truck.
Tony: I knew that.
Tony: If I was having a conversation like that, you'd accuse me of being a Neanderthal.
Kate: That doesn't take a conversation.
Kate: I wonder what happened to McGee?
Tony: Probably curled up on the trail, sucking his thumb.
McGee: I know what it stands for.
Tony: Well, excuse me for trying to help junior agents!
McGee: Trust me, if I need help, you'll be the first person I ask... where Gibbs or Kate is.
Kate: That's very mature, Tony. Men and women can just be friends. Right, McGee?
Kate: What do you mean, technically?
Tony: (laughs) He means you'd have to be pretty ugly first.
Kate: I seriously don't get paid enough for this. (Tony and McGee laugh) You guys are four years old, honestly.
Kate: Abby, say to Tony that a man and a woman can be friends.
Tony: Without having sex.
Abby: No, Tony, they do have sex.
Abby: Come on, Kate. Have you never slept with your friend?
Kate: (upset) What is wrong with you people?
Gibbs: (steps in) Good question, Kate.
(Abby hands out to McGee)
McGee: (looks at Kate) She bet me $20 she could make you wear that today.
(Kate looks at McGee, then Abby. McGee then leaves)
Abby: Your cut.
(hands Kate money)
Kate: Pleasure doing business with you, Abbs.
McGee: I know how to search a wooded area, Tony. I'm not an idiot.
Tony: Didn't say you were.
McGee: Why do you always treat me like one?
Tony: Just trying to impart a little wisdom, McGee.
McGee: (looking at his rash in a CD Abby handed him) This is gonna hurt isn't it?
McGee: I look like a circus freak.
Tony: She means you look like the elephant man, Probie.
Tony: It's true.
Tony: Looks like we're going to play Gibbs' favorite game.
Abby: OOO. Musical interrogation rooms!
McGee: People are staring at me.
Tony: Of course. You're hideously disfigured Probie. If you had listened to me, you wouldn't be in this mess.
McGee: If I had listened to you, Gibbs would have fired me 6 months ago.
(Tony raises hand, then stops)
McGee: You were gonna smack me, but you stopped.
Tony: I remember what it was like being the new guy. Never fitting in. Besides... there's the obvious..
McGee: You like me?
Tony: No. It would be like touching a leper.
Kate: As disturbing as this sounds, I think you may be right about this sexes thing.
Tony: It's Biology 101.
Kate: Would you say I'm attractive?
Kate: Then...how come...you've never....
Tony: I know you.....
Gibbs: Might wanna cover your ears. (shoots a propane tank and blows up a camper)
Tony: I think you got him boss.
Tony: Anyone seen my ballcap?
Tony: 'Cause I could have sworn I left it on my desk.
(Gibbs smiles as he sees the dog eating out of it.)
Tony: (About a porn star) We have a lot in common.
Tony: Among other things...
Tony: I'm practicing, Kate.
Kate: What, annoying me?
Tony: No, the creepy way Gibbs used to sneak up on us.
Kate: What do you mean used to?
Tony: The old man's been wearing Bengay lately. I can smell him coming a mile away.
Gibbs: (From directly behind Tony) Is that a fact, DiNozzo?
Tony: (winces) Knee feeling better boss?
Abby: Gibbs, do you have a camcorder?
Gibbs: Yeah. Digital, okay?
Abby: Good, Gibbs, Way to go! D'you make the move to CD's yet? 'Cause if you didn't, it's cool. 'Cause all the hot DJs, they use vinyl these days anyway.
Gibbs: Just get it to me.
Abby: Hey, Gibbs, Gibbs, Gibbs, Gibbs, Gibbs, Gibbs, Gibbs! (Gibbs turns and looks at her) Peace out man.
Original International Airdates:
Croatia: December 08, 2005 on NOVA TV
Finland: May 19, 2007 on Nelonen
France: October 28, 2005 on M6
Germany: December 08, 2005 on SAT.1
Sweden: July 03, 2005 on TV3
Denmark: March 1, 2005 on TV3
Abby: (About the poison ivy on McGee's face) Maybe you could wear a mask.
This is in reference to the Broadway play (made into a movie later), Phantom of the Opera, where a man who was hideously scarred on one half of his face wore a half mask to hide it. McGee's rash is on the same side of the face.
Abby: Okay, this next part is like an outtake from Deliverance.
Deliverence is a story of four men on a weekend canoe trip on the Cahulawassee River which turns into a frenzied retreat from horror.
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