NCIS Season 2 Episode 6

Abby: Cool. So, what is he? Some sort of killer shop teacher?
Gibbs: Killer squid. Thanks, Abbs.

Abby: (About Reyes) I think she has the hots for you. (Gibbs gives Abby a look) Okay, you're right, she is so not your type.

Kate: I'll take the front door.
Tony: Then I demand to take the rear.

Kate: (talking to herself) Two! Twenty-two, fourteen, twenty two!
Tony: Women, Willy. Can't live with them... Can't think of a reason why you'd want to.

Willy: Goal! Hey, touch me, it's child abuse.

Gibbs: While you are hoping, I have a Navy family living in fear they'll be executed on the way to the mall.

Micki: Okay. NCIS. So I take it this wasn't an accident?

Willy: Have you shot anybody?
Tony: Not this week.

Tony: I want double overtime for this, boss. That kid's a nightmare.
Gibbs: He reminds me of you.

Kate: I don't trust her.
Gibbs: Good. You're learning.

Gibbs: We going to let these people get on with their lives, or we going to stand here and stare them to death?

Palmer: Yeah. When I was a kid, I used to bury our pets under our porch till my mom found out. She was pretty upset.
Ducky: They didn't want you to bury your pets?
Palmer: No. We lived on the tenth floor of an apartment building.

Tony: Hey, listen. You..You and me, we're kinda going to be hangin'.
Willy: You are kidding.
Tony: It's gonna be great.
Willy: It already sucks.

Tony: Hey, yeah. I remember how I felt when my dog died, Willy.
Willy: Bite me.
(Tony growls at Willy)

Kate: Running out in the open? This is not a good idea.
Tony: Well, she's stubborn, won't listen to reason, and is definitely used to getting her own way. Kind of reminds me of someone.
Kate: Yeah, like a female Gibbs.
Tony: See, I was thinking you.

Reyes: Don't worry, okay? After that, the FBI will pick up protection.
Gibbs: Yeah, that's what I'm afraid of.

Kate: Daughter's boyfriend. Probably not the first time he's snuck in, but I guarantee, the last. Mom packs a Glock.
Gibbs: Where is Romeo now?
Kate: On his way home to change his pants. And Juliet is getting her butt reamed by the Capulets.

Kate: I've run presidential protection details, Reyes. You don't assign two undercover units without coordination.
Gibbs: She's not interested in protection, Kate.
Kate: You wanted them to try again.
Gibbs: The FBI thinks the assassination team after the commander is part of a much larger operation.
Kate: And we're the bait to draw them out.
Reyes: Our Intel indicates that they were planning something catastrophic. We were hoping by observing this team that they would lead us to the rest of the network.
Kate: And if the commander and her family just happen to die in the process? Wow. And I thought Fornell was a bastard.

Gibbs: My people are protecting that family. If they have to, they will die doing it. If that happens... ask Fornell what I'd do.

McGee: If Gibbs sees me playing this...
Gibbs: Hey. McGee.
McGee: Yeah boss?
Gibbs: Status report.
Willy: YES! Haha!
Tony: McGee.
McGee: Uh... girl is-is in a room. Um their parents are-are in the kitchen with Kate and, uh, I guess you know where the boy is.
Gibbs: Yup.
McGee: Won't happen again.
Gibbs: I know.

Kate: You know, you should be flattered. I used to protect the President.
Jen: Of what?
Kate: The United States.
Jen: Really? And now you're protecting me.
Kate: And your whole family.
Jen: What a waste. Might be four people... but it's not a family.

Reyes: Hey. Where the hell are you going? Gibbs. Oh, you must be Gibbs. Fornell's mentioned you.

Gibbs: I'll get their names.
Reyes: Oh? How? You going to force feed him your coffee?
Gibbs: You see, DiNozzo was wrong about you. You do have a sense of humor. Don't miss the 6:00 news, Agent Reyes.
Reyes: What the hell have you done?
Gibbs: Nothing yet. But isn't our FBI using an American family as terrorist bait news?
Reyes: You'll blow our entire operation.
Gibbs: Sure. But I'll also get Moore in my chat room.
Reyes: Look, even an agent as arrogant as you are has to know that what you're threatening is a career ender.
Gibbs: Only if he doesn't talk. If he does it's a career maker. Suzanne McRoberts, please. Special Agent Gibbs, NCIS. You've seen Suzanne on TV. She's cute, blonde, does the anchor on the news. That had better mean we have a deal or you're going to lose a finger.
Reyes: You don't crack Moore, the appendage that I'll cut off will mean so much more to you than a finger.

Kate: You're being too hard on yourself, Commander. From where I stand, you're a role model.
Micki: You know what was my biggest fear in the Navy? This feeling that ... everything that I was fighting for, everything that I wanted to protect ... wouldn't be here when I got back. And now I've brought the war home with me.

Kate: What are you doing?!
Tony: Uh... listening.
Kate: That is just wrong.
Tony: Sneaking your horny boyfriend into a house filled with armed federal agents who are on the lookout for Al Qaeda assassins-- that's wrong, Kate. Me? I'm just trying to gather some valuable intel so I can do my job better.

Kate: (coming into the bathroom as Kate showers) Tony! Out of here. Now!
Tony: What? I'm just brushing my teeth. Oh, hey, don't use up the hot water 'cause you've been in there forever.
Kate: Tony, how long have you been in here?
Tony: Long enough to know you can't sing... and haven't shaved your legs in a week. 'Outrageous.'

Kate: Tony...
Tony: Yes, Kate, dear?
Kate: There's only one bathroom downstairs.
Tony: And your point is?
Kate: The seat stays down.
Tony: Unless it's up.

Tony: Oh, sounds like we're goin to need the infrared scope on this one, McGee.
McGee: The one that can see through walls at night?
Tony: Better than pay-TV, and, the best part? It's free.
Kate: And that's the reason why, Tony.
Tony: Why what, Kate?
Kate: You'll never get my home address.

Kate: Where are you going?
Jen: Bathroom. Why, you want to watch me pee, Special Agent Todd?

Micki: It's a run. What's the worst that could happen?
David: Uh, you could get shot by a sniper.
Micki: That would solve a lot of problems, wouldn't it?

Gibbs: It was your people that were lucky today, Agent Reyes.
Reyes: Oh, yeah? How do you figure that?
Gibbs: Because my people shoot to kill.

Gibbs: I see something.
Abby: You see speckling, Gibbs.

Abby: Um. Machine making pretty pictures now.