Ned's Declassified School Survival Guide

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Nickelodeon (ended 2007)

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  • Nicknames / Shyness

    Full Episode

    S 2 : Ep 11 - 2/25/06

    Nicknames: Ned tries to create a new, cool nickname for himself by doing wild stunts but ends up injuring himself in the end, while Moze decides she no longer likes her nickname (Moze) and tries to have her friends simply call her "Jennifer." Cookie invents a nicknaming machine that Loomer quickly steals for his bullying advantage. Cookie sets out to fix what he messed up, while Ned has trouble calling Moze Jennifer.
    Shyness: Ned finds the Oboe twins to be a perfect match for his girlfriend needs and Moze's best-girlfriend need. The only problem is that they're too shy. So Ned and Moze try to make over the twins. Cookie starts up his own shyness seminar.moreless
  • School Websites / Valentine's Day

    Full Episode

    S 2 : Ep 10 - 2/11/06

    School Websites: Ned, Moze and Cookie make changes to the school website.

    Valentine’s Day: Ned sends Suzie a rose. Cookie sends himself multiple roses to try to be the hottest kid in school, and Moze becomes the hottest girl in school.moreless
  • Substitute Teachers / The New Kid

    Full Episode

    S 2 : Ep 9 - 1/21/06

    Substitute Teachers:Ned helps Mr. Weiner, a favorite substitute from elementary school get in touch with his middle school side. Cookie poses as a substitute teacher. Moze becomes bad-girl material and misbehaves with the new science substitutes.
    The New Kid: Ned tries to help a new kid, Bernice, at James K. Polk. Gordy competes against a new janitor that could take over his spot.moreless
  • Dares / Bad Habits

    Full Episode

    S 2 : Ep 8 - 1/14/06

    Dares: Ned is dared to ask super popular Missy on a date, but that is easier said then done. Plus it also has to be in front of all of Missy's friends! Cookie and Loomer compete in a big dare event to see who is the king of dares. Moze has to wear a sun dress and she makes new friends. She thinks her new friends are robots.
    Bad Habits: Ned is trying to get rid of saying "yes" to people every time they ask him a favor. Cookie chews gum and pencils as a way to help him overcome his pack rat habit. Moze does her best to stop talking trash on the volleyball court, especially after she tells Ned and Cookie she can quit any bad habit.moreless
  • Upperclassmen / Gross Biology Dissection

    Full Episode

    S 2 : Ep 7 - 11/19/05

    Upperclassmen: Ned offers to give a trouble making 5th grader a tour of the school. Moze has a crush on an upperclassman.

    Gross Biology Dissection: Ned is torn between Moze and Suzie during a biology dissection project with Moze taking a pro-dissection, and Suzie taking an anti-dissection stance.moreless
  • Your Body / Procrastination

    Full Episode

    S 2 : Ep 6 - 11/12/05

    Your Body: Moze freaks when she feels she is too tall. After crushing somebody's project, she really wants to become short. Ned tries to become strong after Coach agreed to Loomer that they'd have a weight lifting competition. Cookie tries to become overprotective so Loomer won't hurt him.

    Procrastination: Moze bets Ned that he won't finish his project on time and the loser has to stand in front of the school as a clown. Cookie creates a machine that will stop his procrastination problems. Moze also needs to learn to clog dance.moreless
  • Vice Principals / Mondays

    Full Episode

    S 2 : Ep 5 - 11/5/05

    Vice Principals: Vandalism happens in the wood shop class. So the vice principal comes and finds a 'Cheedle' at the scene. He keeps gathering suspects as more vandalism occurs. Mondays: Every Monday morning, people are grumpy, tired and depressed. Ned and Moze are determined to find a way to beat the Monday Blues, but they end up letting a monkey wreak havoc in the school for weeks.moreless
  • Notebooks / Math

    Full Episode

    S 2 : Ep 4 - 10/22/05

    Notebooks: Ned and Gordy caper to swipe Sweeney's "Golden Notebook." Moze finds a notebook full of juicy school rumors and Cookie invents the video notebook.

    Math: Ned starts a math study group with the smartest kids in class, but they soon realize that Ned isn't doing any work. Moze is faced with the challenge of pre-algebra and Cookie is promoted to 8th grade honors math, but his teacher is crazy.moreless
  • Video Projects / School Clubs

    Full Episode

    S 2 : Ep 3 - 10/15/05

    Video Projects: Ned and Cookie team up to make the ultimate video project. But the ultimate video project is easier said, than done. Moze makes a documentary about Mr. Wright, who's acting too cool to get students to like him.


    School Clubs: Ned tries to stop Missy's Popular Club. Ned feels it is taking over the school and that Missy thinks everybody is a nerd. Moze and Suzie compete in every single club to be the best but it backfires and they get kicked out. So they have only one club left to choose from. Which club will they join? Cookie starts his own club, the Archeology Club which helps Ned get into Missy's club and bring him all around the school.

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  • Pep Rallies / Lunch

    Full Episode

    S 2 : Ep 2 - 10/8/05

    Pep Rallies: Ned becomes school mascot Wolfie, so he can miss class. Moze struggles to give a peppy speech and Cookie tries to spice it up with his own Super Cookie halftime stunt!

    Lunch: Ned tries to stop "One Bite" who's taking is lunch and eating it in "one bite." After devising a plan with hot sauce, Ned is sure "One Bite" won't steal his lunch anymore. Moze wonders why Suzie doesn't want to sit with her at lunch. Moze tries everything she can possibly think of, yet none of it works. Cookie panics after Lunch Lady predicts doom.

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  • New Semester / Electives

    Full Episode

    S 2 : Ep 1 - 10/1/05

    New Semester: Ned seeks his first kiss from Suzie Crabgrass which is on his "new semester list", but first he enlists Moze's help to break up Suzie and Loomer. By breaking them up Ned would have Suzie. Meanwhile, Cookie starts the new semester with a new super cool look and becomes a bully. Electives: Ned, Moze and Cookie try out different electives so they can finally get a class together and score an easy "A."moreless
  • Emergency Drills / Late Bus

    Full Episode

    S 1 : Ep 13 -

    Emergency Drills: Every time Ned wants to ask Suzie to Chandra Taylor's party an emergency drill distracts him. Eventually, Ned gets to ask Suzie and she accepts. The only problem is Ned can't go to the party because he, Cookie, and Moze are trapped in Gordy's extra supply locker.

    Late Bus: When bus number 9 breaks down, all the kids are stuck waiting for another bus. Loomer makes a deal with Ned that he won't bully him for an entire year if Ned helps him get Moze's attention. Meanwhile, Cookie is leading a "Cookie's Late Bus After School Tour" in which he shows kids what teachers do after hours. We see Coach Dirga crying over a soap opera, and the worst possible thing ever, a teacher rap group taught by Lil' Romeo. Also, Moze makes friends with another Jennifer, but finds out it's her last day. And what we have seen, this may lead to a friendship between Moze and Suzie Crabgrass.

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  • Cheaters / Bullies

    Full Episode

    S 1 : Ep 12 - 2/12/05

    Cheaters: Ned must decide if he's going to cheat on a test. Bitsy keeps copying Moze's work so Moze develops a plan to get Bitsy in trouble. Cookie develops a system for studying and is accused of cheating which leads him to take his test without any tools, proving a point to the teacher. Bullies: Loomer is looking for Ned and Cookie, they decide to make a stand. Moze and Claire start Peer Mediation to help with problems at school The only problem is that they cannot find a teacher worthy of leading Peer Mediation. But when they find him, it is too late to stop Ned and Lumer's fight?moreless
  • Day Dreaming / Gym

    Full Episode

    S 1 : Ep 11 - 2/5/05

    Daydreams: Ned daydreams in Science class. Sweeney challenges the class to answer a riddle before they can go to lunch. Fairly Odd Parents lend Ned a hand, along with super agent Moze and Tech Wizard Cookie.

    Gym: Moze and Ned spar in martial arts and Ned gets thrown for a loop. So now Ned practices to beat Moze, after being humiliated by being beaten by a girl. Cookie must pass Dirga's gym requirements so he does Seth's homework in return for Seth to do Cookie's laps for him.moreless
  • Notes / Best Friends

    Full Episode

    S 1 : Ep 10 - 1/9/05

    Notes: Bitsy has Ned pass a note and Sweeney catches him, now he must pay. He has to write an essay along with everyone else so they plot revenge. Cookie finds joy in forging notes, but danger comes when he leads the teachers to the forgers "domain".

    Best Friends: Moze continues her search for a new best friend with a quiz and whoever matches up closely is meant for her. But Moze ends up joining the Huge Crew. The Killer Bees recruit Cookie which puts Ned and Cookie's friendship to the test. Ned tries to find a new best friend in place of Cookie.

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  • Computer Lab / Backpacks

    Full Episode

    S 1 : Ep 9 - 1/2/05

    Computer Lab: Ned and Moze are banned from the computer lab. Cookie learns about life away from technology thanks to Lisa Zemo. Ned and Moze disguise themselves to get back in the lab.

    Backpack: Ned needs a new backpack after his breaks so he goes to Backpack Boy for help. Moze loses her backpack so she needs to find it before somebody reads her personal diary. Cookie creates the "bodypack" so he doesn't need a backpack, but it backfires on him due to Loomer.moreless
  • School Elections / Talent Show

    Full Episode

    S 1 : Ep 8 - 11/28/04

    School Elections: Ned doesn't want to run for class president because it's a popularity contest. Moze and Cookie think he'd be great. Ned tries to drop out by vandalizing, starting food fights, and that. It comes down to the undecided vote, Coconut Head! Now its a mission to find out who he will vote for.

    Talent Show: Ned and Cookie create "Talentpalooza" when kids are excluded from the boring school talent show, ran by Mr. Wright who seems to deny every interesting talent. Moze must decide which of her many talents would be good for the show. Cookie gets people out of the regular talent show and into "Talentpalooza" which gets Mr. Wright mad.

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  • Rumors / Photo Day

    Full Episode

    S 1 : Ep 7 - 11/7/04

    Rumors: Rumors terrorize the group; a rumor spreads that Ned and Moze are dating, and Cookie and Gordy fight against Mr. Sweeney to see if a rumored "atomic flush" is true, and Ned develops a plan for it. Photo Day: It's Photo Day at James Polk. Ned gives Moze a crash course on how to take a good picture, and Cookie holds auditions for someone to take his picture for him.moreless
  • Sick Days / Spelling Bee

    Full Episode

    S 1 : Ep 6 - 10/17/04

    Sick Days: Ned must stay healthy when the flu hits Polk Middle School and he finds out Mat Hoffman is coming to visit. Cookie tries to keep his perfect attendance record intact with help from Lisa. Moze tries to get sick and miss her speech in Social Studies. Not succeeding, Moze must make her speech but finds out it is easier than she thought.

    Spelling Bee: Cookie is the only one with a chance to beat the dreaded Killer Bees. With an easy spell at the spelling bee, will it be Ned who beats the Killer Bees? Moze copes with sitting by the aptly named Mr. Gross after spelling a word wrong.moreless
  • Crushes / Dances

    Full Episode

    S 1 : Ep 5 - 10/10/04

    Crushes: Ned has a crush on Suzie and Cookie has developed a "perfect match" computer program. Coconut Head follows Moze and she thinks that Coconut Head wants to ask her to the dance.

    Dances: Ned wants to dance with Suzie. But with her getting together and breaking up, will he be able to dance with her? Moze has dance tips of her own while Cookie waits for supermodel Martika after forcing to get her to be his perfect match.

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  • Seating / Tryouts

    Full Episode

    S 1 : Ep 4 - 10/3/04

    Seating: Ned and Cookie to figure out how to sit at the cool table. Moze changes when she moves to the front of Science class and does so good that the teacher reverses the room, making Moze in back.. Gordy helps Cookie create the ultimate bus bounce.

    Tryouts: Ned attempts ascending to the basketball team and tries to become taller so he'll make the team. Moze goes out for volleyball, basketball, track, but must decide between them. With some help from Ned, she decides which is right for her. Cookie tumbles into cheer leading and demands equal rights after being kicked out.moreless
  • Teachers / Detentions

    Full Episode

    S 1 : Ep 3 - 9/26/04

    Teachers: Ned clashes with Mr. Sweeney and realizes how to get an A, by doing the work! Moze has a new student teacher in math, and devises a plan to get the students to listen to him. Cookie is distracted by the beautiful Ms. Enstile and tries to control his affection toward her.

    Detentions: Ned, Cookie and Moze are sent to detention for various reasons. Moze gets out of it by helping out Coach Dirga. Cookie and Ned fear the bad kids in the back row.moreless
  • Bathrooms / Project Partners

    Full Episode

    S 1 : Ep 2 - 9/19/04

    Bathrooms: Moze puts Ned's name on a bathroom stall, and someone puts kissy lips next to it. Cookie tries to hold using the bathroom but gets stuck in the girls' room.


    Project Partners: Ned and Cookie's baby is kidnapped. Moze must choose a partner for Social Studies.

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  • First Day / Lockers

    Full Episode

    S 1 : Ep 1 - 9/12/04

    First Day: It's the first day of school, and Ned and Cookie discover Moze has taken Cooking instead of Art to separate herself from the guys for once.

    Lockers: When Ned's new locker neighbor gives him a bad rep, he searches for a new locker. Moze tries to use her locker to make new friends that are girls, but ends up competing with Suzie Crabgrass.

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