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Tuesday 9:00 PM on FOX (Returning September 16th, 2014)

MARVEL-OUS NEWS

... Superhero factory Marvel wants to cram superhero this and superpowered that down your throat until you choke on spandex. The media company is following up its feature-film blockbusters and Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. with more plans to take over your television. Apparently Marvel is assembling a package deal that would give one lucky network four Marvel-licensed series and one miniseries. The project would involve 60 episodes, which I'm guessing would break down into four 13-episode series and one 8-episode miniseries. No individual properties have been mentioned, but the networks Marvel is looking to partner with are in the cable and on-demand space, with Netflix, Amazon, and original programming upstart WGN America as the rumored candidates. [Deadline Hollywood]


BUSINESS TIME

... Did you know famous actors probably make more money than you do? And also that people are obsessed with knowing who makes the most? Well the latest list is out, and Ashton Kutcher is once again at the top of it, thanks to the hefty payday he earns from Two and a Half Men, syndication royalties from that show, various investments, and his endorsement deals. Following Kutcher are his Two and a Half Men castmate Jon Cryer, Ray Romano, Neil Patrick Harris, Mark Harmon, Patrick Dempsey, Tim Allen, and Angus T. Jones. Is this list from now or from 2003? [Forbes]

... Last night, Community's Donald Glover wrote down his reason for leaving the NBC comedy on hotel stationery, and then he Instagrammed it. Basically he said, "You have to be on your own." [Instagram]

... When you think of the Discovery Channel, you think... scripted programming! Discovery's descent into being a shell of what it once was continues with news that the network, once known for educational and scientific fare, has put its first scripted drama into development. The Five Families comes from Goodfellas duo Irwin Winkler and Nicholas Pileggi and follows the formation of the New York's Gambino, Genovese, Lucchese, Bonanno, and Colombo crime families. Discovery already has several scripted miniseries in the works, including Klondike and North and South. [THR]

... Very important news! TLC's Best Funeral Ever, a docu-series about some very fun funerals, will now premiere Monday, December 2 at 10pm. [TLC via press release]

... Remember when New Girl decided to bring back Coach (Damon Wayans Jr., remember him? From the pilot?) and everyone wondered how that would work out? Well, now we know! One of the show's four roommates (Jess, Nick, Winston, Schmidt) is MOVING OUT! Temporarily, at least. The vacated room will allow Coach to move back in, while one of the roomies hunkers down somewhere else. E! Online says is isn't who you think it is (which would be Winston, I guess?). And just to be clear, the departing roommate is not leaving the show; this sounds more like a temporary arc. [E! Online]



CASTING NEWS

... NCIS might not be the only show in the franchise to lose a cherished member of the teamNCIS: Los Angeles may also be a little lighter by the time this season is done. According to cast member Daniela Ruah, rumors are swirling that someone will depart toward the end of the season. Who could it be? Johnny Stripes? Nicholas Bottomtopper? Esmeralda Flippidyfloo? Can you guys tell I don't watch this show? Because I think I did a fantastic job with those names. [E! Online]


HOT WATER ALERT

... Saturday Night Live's Kenan Thompson... you are in HOT WATER! When TV Guide asked Thompson about the lack of black female comedians on SNL, Thompson said, "It's just a tough part of the business.... Like in auditions, they just never find ones that are ready." The interviewer said Thompson blamed "the lack of quality black female comedians." (TV Guide's quote, not Thompson's), and the story is headlined "Kenan Thompson Blames SNL's Diversity Issue on Lack of Talented Black Comediennes," even though Thompson appears to have said that the black female comedians who auditioned weren't ready. So maybe it's TV Guide who is in the hot water! [TV Guide]


SAD NEWS

... I don't watch MTV's Catfish except when my slavemaster has control of the remote, but the one episode I have seen (Season 2's "Ashley and Mike") featured a guy who pretended to be a hunky underwear model in order to start an online relationship with a woman. The woman went to meet him, but instead of being all sexy abs, he was ten different kinds of flab. However, an interesting thing happened; he turned out to be the nicer person of the two, and the woman, who had her own personal issues with weight, rejected him because he wasn't on the cover of Men's Health. It was disappointing because the guy was totally sweet and even though he was doing the catfishing, he deserved better than the girl. That guy was Michael Fortunato, and the sad news out of MTV is that he passed away from a pulmonary embolism over the weekend. He was 26 years old. [MTV]


Previously Aired Episode

AIRED ON 5/6/2014

Season 3 : Episode 23

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