Jimmy: I once had a line of detergents with a great brand name, "Dandy Clean". Everybody trusted it, but that break dancing fad hit and my people made me change it. Y'know, to try to stay hip and everything like that, and the whole thing went bust in less than a year.
Lisa: What'd you change the name to?
Jimmy: Break Dancing Detergent.
Max: Grab my arm.
Max: Trust me. (Dave grabs Max's arm) Take your hands off me sir! Groveling is one thing but this is too much! I said I was leaving and that's final! Goodbye!
Dave: Oh good, Max you're still here.
Max: What do you want?
Dave: Max, please don't...
Jimmy: Swallow it, Dave, swallow it.
Dave: Max please don't leave.
Max: Am I to understand that you're begging me to stay?
Max: Are those tears in your eyes?
Jimmy: Swallow, swallow.
Dave: Yeah Max, it's getting a little misty here.
Dave: No way am I gonna do it.
Jimmy: I thought you were the boss of them.
Dave: I am the boss of them.
Jimmy: Well, sometimes the boss of them has to swallow his pride for the good of them.
Dave: Well, then why don't you go out there and beg Max to stay?
Jimmy: Because I am the boss of you.
Max: Look, I took a shot and it failed. Now c'mon Dave help me get out of it.
Dave: Get yourself out of it.
Max: I can't.
Dave: Just tell everyone you've changed your mind.
Max: I can't. Then Beth would know I was faking it the whole time.
Dave: Well, that's too bad.
Max: I have my pride.
Dave: No you don't.
Max: Will you be a man for once and take responsibility for my actions?
Jimmy: Dave and I would like to take one more try at talking some sense into you.
Dave: Yeah, Max don't leave.
Max: Well gentlemen, although tempting nothing on this Earth or Moon could persuade me to stay. Hey, do you guys feel a draft in here?
Jimmy: No, I feel fine.
Max: Oh, because it seems like there's a lot of wind over here by the door. I'm gonna shut this door. (shuts door) Please let me stay! Please let me stay! I promise I won't talk to anyone and I won't get in anybody's way! Please, please just let me stay!
Jimmy: You can stay.
Dave: Max, what the hell are you talking about? You quit.
Max: No I didn't quit! It was just a ploy to get Beth to go out with me!
Dave: Beth was right?
Max: Yes! I was bluffing and she saw right through me! Oh I'm lonely! I'm so lonely!
Lisa: And now, filling in for the absent Max Louis, here's Matthew Brock with the Brock Report. Opinions expressed by Matthew Brock are not necessarily those of WNYX. Facts cited by Matthew Brock are not necessarily facts.
Matthew: Why don't people smile more? A recent survey shows that 80% of people never ever smile. These people need to go to jail. In the happy 20% are my cats Chew Chew Bonewagon and Mitt Mitt St. Clair. What up guys!