Night Court

Season 1 Episode 1

All You Need Is Love

Aired Unknown Jan 04, 1984 on NBC



  • Trivia

    • Charlotte Portney makes her first appearance as the courtroom stenographer.  She will appear in 48 more episodes, but is never credited.

    • As Harry Stone walks near the "jury box/waiting area", you can see the boom mic a couple of times.

  • Quotes

    • Harry: I own every record Mel Torme ever made. I'm gonna marry the girl who's impressed by that.

    • Dan: How did you get appointed to the bench?
      Harry: You know Dan, that's a funny story. It was the mayor's last day in office and it was a Sunday and my name was at the bottom of the list of a 1,000 candidates. So they start calling folks starting at the top of the list. You see it's Sunday and no one's home. So they keep calling down the list, name by name. No one answers. Finally they get down to the bottom of the list and voila.
      Lana: You mean you were appointed a judge because…
      Harry: I was home.

    • Selma: I had a husband just like that.
      Bull: Oh yeah?
      Selma: Yeah, I had to shoot him too.

    • Mr. Kerr: Your Honor…
      Harry: Oh come on Phil, one more flip: Heads we send [your wife] up the river, tails you take her home.
      Mr. Kerr: No, every time you flip that [coin] it comes up heads.
      Harry: Well of course it does, it's a double-headed coin. Come on, you didn't think I believed in luck did ya?

    • Lana: You're crazy. I mean an attempted murder and you send the plaintiff and the defendant out for a cup of coffee. What do murders get? Brunch?
      Harry: Alright my methods are informal. (Lana giggles) Hey give them a chance. They might work. Maybe just maybe, it will work. (Sheila and Dan enter with tattered clothes) Then again, maybe someday pigs will fly.

    • Harry: Mr. Prosecutor, Ms. Gardener, I am prepared to listen to the testimony, cross-examine the witnesses, consider the precedents that I'm sure you've both prepared, but I don't think that's gonna be necessary.
      Lana: (shouting) What do you mean it's not necessary?
      Harry: I'm glad you asked. We will not take a short recess. During that time I order the defendant, Mrs. Kerr and her husband, Mr. Kerr and the attorneys involved to go to a nearby restaurant, sit down, have a cup of coffee, relax, try to work out this little thing.
      Dan: Your Honor, this is highly irregular.
      Harry: Thanks. Court's recessed.

    • Lana: State v. Kerr, your honor. Your Honor, this case has…
      Harry: Let's all gather around the big desk, huh.
      Lana: Your Honor, this case has some intricate facets you might want…
      Harry: Perhaps you can give it to me in a nutshell.
      Lana: Husband and wife married 27 years. She catches him with a prostitute. Fires a couple of shots, misses them both by a mile. So the DA files for attempted murder.
      Harry: this could go either way.
      Lana: Yes.
      Harry: Unless.
      Lana: What?
      Harry: No I guess it's gotta go either way.

    • Harry: Ladies and gentlemen of the court, well how the hell are you tonight?

    • Lana: I don't know what's holding the judge up.
      Dan: Diaper change, perhaps.

    • Sheila: You heard anything about [the judge]? Anything at all.
      Lana: Nada. I was just told to expect him tonight.
      Sheila: I hope he's got a background in criminal law.
      Dan: I hope he plays chess.
      Sheila: A new man has been appointed to the bench and all you hope for is someone who can play chess.
      Dan: I also hope his first name is not Scheky.

    • Lana: The judge will be here any minute. Are you finished painting?
      Painter: Yeah.
      Lana: Well then what are you doing?
      Painter: Watching the naked couple in the building across the alley. They're fooling around.
      Lana: That's depraved.
      Painter: Too soon to tell.
      Lana: I meant you. How would you like somebody watching you and your wife doing that?
      Painter: My wife won't do that.

    • Harry: (to messenger) Thanks. Sorry I don't tip. Besides how do I know you're not the type to go out and spend it on a Barry Manilow album?

  • Notes

    • Gail Strickland appears as the public defender in the pilot episode only. In the next episode, she is replaced with regular cast member Paula Kelly.

  • Allusions

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