Bull: Happy Honeymoon. Don't do anything I wouldn't do.
Robert: I doubt if I could.
Dan: So Craven prints it, now what's the worst that can happen?
Harry: Well I'd be publicly disgraced, making it impossible for me to function effectively as a judge. I'd have to step down.
Dan: Right, but you've still got your health. I'm sorry. I've never tried to cheer up anybody before.
Al: But you're dying to know what Judge Stone is hiding as much as the rest of us.
Lana: Who says he's hiding anything?
Al: Hey, everybody's got something to hide, lady. That's what makes this country great.
Ronald: Supposed on your wedding day you saw your wife in the nude.
Harry: I'll think I'd probably insist on it.
Harry: What's next?
Lana: Next we have a rather unusual case, Your Honor.
Harry: What's the problem?
Groom: She's a slut.
Bride: He's an animal.
Harry: Off the top of my head, marital problems.
Lana: Not quite, Your Honor. They never finished the ceremony.
Dan: Judge Stone.
Dan: We were just curious and we're a little curious. What is your age?
Harry: Oh I'm a little over 900 years old. That's what a spiritualist once told me anyway. It seems I have this very old soul. Of course the first couple of hundred years are sort of a blur.
Selma: I know how you feel.
Al: Hey, hey, hey, judge. Any disembowelments tonight?
Harry: Not that I know of, no.
Al: Mutilation, murders, bizarre suicides.
Harry: Nothin' good on TV tonight, Mr. uh?
Al: Craven, Al Craven.
Harry: (unsure about Al) Yeah?
Al: With The Gazette. I did that big front page story last week about the lady who fricasseed the poodle.
Harry: Al Craven, the journalist.
Al: You know I really like it here in court, Judge. There's always a never ending supply of human misery in a place like this.
Harry: Yeah, yeah. Most people don't see the fun side of pain and suffering.
Harry: See ya.
Barney Martin, who guest starred as the Bum, later appeared regularly on Seinfeld as Jerry's dad.