Dr. Christian Troy
Dr. Liz Cruz
Dr. Quentin Costa
In the opening scene, the patient Ben White takes off his right trouser leg to show the doctors his right leg. In the next shot, he puts on his pair of trousers by just one move and sits down. Actually, he will have to refill his right leg to the trouser leg and put on his trousers afterwards. A simple move is just impossible.
The Witness Protection Program is not under jurisdiction of the F.B.I. It's a part of the U.S. Marshals. And it's actually the Witness Security Program.
Members can only join under extreme circumstances in cases in which their life is in serious danger.
Though physical alterations such as plastic surgery are done, they are very rare. Most witnesses simply change their name, either their last or both first and last. It depends on the case.
Joan Rivers: Don't think of me as a celebrity. Think of me as a familiar face that changes every couple years.
(Christian has just asked Kimber to marry him)
Christian: Today I took off a man's leg so he could feel whole.
Kimber: What has that got to do with it?
Christian: I guess you just have to do whatever it is that makes you feel complete, no matter how crazy it is. All I know is that without you, something's missing. Us. You and me. Til death do us part. I love you. Say yes, Kimber. (produces the ring) Marry me.
Julia: All these years I really believed I couldn't do anything without you. I kept looking to you for my self-esteem, hoping you'd complete me.
Sean: Maybe we both just set it up that way. Maybe I needed to be depended on. Needed.
Julia: I guess we're both better off. I never in a million years would have guessed that in losing my marriage, I'd be finding me.
Christian: (seeing Ben White's awards) The American Architecture Award. Impressive.
Ben White: I got it for an atrium house I designed in 2001. I utilised the power of negative space. The beauty of what's missing.
(after surgery on Nikki and Austin)
Sean: It's like we've given them a new life. A chance to start over.
Dr Sagamore: Too bad they had to lose everything to get it. Their pasts, their identities.
Sean: Maybe sometimes you have to lose who you were to find out who you are.
Ben White: (pointing a gun at Christian) I am so sick of you doctors who think you know all the goddamn answers. Have you ever been desperate, Dr. Troy? Hm?
Christian: Yes, I have.
Ben White: You condescending asshole. You and your perfect body. Couldn't possibly understand what it is like to feel incomplete, that God made a mistake, that help is possible but NO-ONE WILL GIVE IT TO YOU! (shoots himself in the leg)
Joan Rivers: Ladies. Time is money. And at my age, inflation is a bitch.
Gina: (thinking Joan Rivers is going to sue about the semen face-mask) Look on the bright side. The tabloids will go nuts. 'Spa Trio Gives Jizz To Joan'. We'll be famous. Well, she'll be famous, we'll be stoned in the streets.
Christian: (about Sean) He was my mirror, you know? I'd look at him and see who I was.
Kimber: Baby, you can't depend on mirrors. They can make you look fat or old or too thin. And Sean's made you look small. Way smaller than you are.
Christian: I feel like a part of me has gone.
Kimber: Maybe it's a part you don't need any more. Like an appendix. You only know it's there when it hurts and once it's gone, you realise you never really needed it to begin with. You just got used to the pain. I'm glad Sean's gone. If you need a mirror to tell you who you are, you look at me. I know who you are. How big and strong and good you are. (kisses him) Let him go, baby. Just let him go.
Christian: There's this new client who's offering a shitload of money for us to do this unorthodox procedure
Sean: Just what you always wanted, right. No ethical restraints and a shitload of money.
Christian: You left out sexual depravity and devil worship.
Julia: I'm a huge fan.
Joan Rivers: Thank you. But don't think of me as a celebrity. Think of me as a familiar face that changes every couple of weeks.
Christian: I took an oath as a physician. 'First do no harm.'
Ben White: The Hypocritical Oath. The medical profession's unwillingness to help me and others like me stop the pain is what's really harmful.
Julia: Semen's an anti-depressant. It has mood-altering hormones in it. I read about it.
Liz: Didn't do a thing for me.
Gina: What do you do about supply now that your husband's not around?
Gretchen Carr: Oh, that's not a problem. I get all I need from my sons.
Julia: Your sons? You put your sons' semen on your face?
Gretchen Carr: It's not like I stand over them and watch! I give 'em these little amber bottles. They fill 'em up and put 'em on my night-table. (off the girls' looks) Well, it's the least they can do. It's not like I'm asking them to unload the dishwasher.
(on why Gretchen Carr looks so young)
Liz: It's all a matter of diet. Vegetables, eight glasses of water a day..
Gretchen Carr: I put semen on my face every night before I go to bed.
Gina: And I was worried about saying shit.
(during Sean's interview to help the Witness Protection Progam)
Dr Sagamore: Six figures isn't doing it for you anymore?
Sean: I want to be of service. I left my practice, my wife, my son and daughter. I always thought I'd die without them but I didn't. I'm alive. Alive with nothing to live for.
Dr Sagamore: Could you speak up? It's hard to hear through all those violins.
Joan Rivers: (still fascinated by the mystery ingredient of the semen-based face cream) Whatever it is, my girlfriend Heidi Abramowitz used to wear this all the time.
Joan Rivers: (sniffing the semen-based face cream) Smells like... like a Saturday night at the drive-in.
Gina: (amazed by the medical propertes of semen) That's unbelievable! My entire life I thought there was a psychological reason why I'm a sex addict - turns out I was just jonesin' for jizz.
Gina: No-one here could accuse me of being a prude, right?
Liz: No-one anywhere.
International Air Dates:
Czech Republic: September 17, 2008 on TV Nova
Liz Kay and Ellen Brill were nominated for the 2006 Emmy Award for "Outstanding Art Direction for a Single-Camera Series" for this episode.
Music featured in the episode:
Instrumental (Julia on the phone at De La Mer tries to get the business started)
Instrumental (Julia, Liz and Gina discuss about facial sperm treatment potential)
Instrumental (Christian visits Ben and discusses with him about his leg - removal surgery)
Instrumental (Christian and Sean talk about Sean)
Instrumental (Sean and Dr. Sagamore perform surgery on Nicole and Austin)
"Lover's spit" by Broken Social Scene feat. Feist (Christian asks Kimber to marry him)
Bob Gunton receives the 'and' credit
Both Joan Rivers and Anne Heche are credited as Special Guest Stars. Anne Heche is credited as a Special Guest Star for her three episode arc.
Although listed in the opening credits, John Hensley does not appear in this episode.
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