Season 4 Episode 1

Cindy Plumb

Aired Wednesday 10:00 PM Sep 05, 2006 on FX



  • Trivia

    • Celebrating their 5000th surgery together, Sean handed Christian a gold scalpel that reads "September 5th, 2006". That's the same date this episode airs.

    • Goof: During the scene where Cindy is having her voicebox operated on, you can see her eyes flinch and squint. Obviously, she was "awake" when this was filmed, but during a normal procedure such as this, she should be completely sedated and she would not be flinching her eyes.

  • Quotes

    • (Sean sees Christian's new, 'butched-up' apartment)
      Sean: Why is there a statue of a cock in the corner?
      Christian: It's not a cock, Sean. It's called abstract art.

    • Michelle: You don't understand how someone my age can be attracted to an older man.
      Christian: Certainly not without a pre-nup.
      Michelle: So, you just assumed I just married him for his money?
      Christian: Absolutely.
      Michelle: You don't choose who you love, Dr Troy. It chooses you.

    • Cindy Plumb: My marriage fell apart seventeen years ago. I couldn't give my husband what he needed sexually. Don't you love the irony? I truly thought I would die. I'd pour myself a big glass of bourbon and call up one of those chat-lines. I was very lonely. Then one night, sitting there alone, I discovered I wasn't just a sad dumped first wife, I was a goddamn sensual goddess. That's how it works. You may not get what you want but you get what you need. Now I have a life full of these extraordinary men who know there is nobody as smokin' hot as yours truly. I provide a connection they can't get at home. I save marriages now; I don't lose them.

    • Sean: Tell me what you don't like about yourself, Miss Plumb.
      Cindy Plumb: I want a voice lift. (off Sean's look) You make an incision, implant some Goretex, right? And then the youthfully retightened vocal chords eliminate the wobbles, tremors and, in some cases, raise the voice an octave.
      Sean: You've done your research. Are you a singer or an actress or…?
      Cindy Plumb: 'Cindy Plumb can make you cum. In English, Spanish, Mandarin and Japanese. You may be alone but you're not on your own.' (pause) I'm a phone sex artist. I've been getting people off for fifteen years.

    • Dr Faith Wolper: Maybe the reason your relationships with women keep failing is because you're taken.
      Christian: What the hell are you talking about?
      Dr Faith Wolper: Ever consider the possibility that you're in love with your partner?

    • Dr Faith Wolper: In general, your life is working relatively well. Successful practice and, according to your own estimation, you've 'screwed hundreds of the hottest asses in South Beach'. Why ask for help now?
      Christian: Sean and I recently celebrated five thousand surgeries and, to reward my accomplishments, I picked up a couple of gals and… screwed them til my dick almost fell off. Fifteen years ago, I celebrated our first surgery the same way.
      Dr Faith Wolper: Have you ever had any loving adult relationships?
      Christian: (long pause) Yeah, sure.
      Dr Faith Wolper: What happened?
      Christian: One of them married Sean and the other… well, it just didn't work out. It wasn't my fault. Even Sean couldn't make it work with her.

    • Jill: (to Christian) You are so afraid of connecting. You're destined to die alone.

    • (Mother and daughter Jill and Riley are in bed with Christian)
      Riley: Did he kiss you?
      Jill: So… our tongues are good enough to go in your ass but not your mouth.
      Christian: It's really not one after the other.
      Riley: What kind of guy doesn't want to be kissed?
      Jill: The kind I warned you about. Just like your father. Do you know what kind of women accept not being kissed? Whores. We're not whores.
      Christian: No, you're the goddamn Mother Of The Year. (pause) Get out.

    • Christian: Have you been intimate with your husband since the operation?
      Michelle: Yes.
      Burt: I think I would've remembered that, honey.
      Michelle: Real intimacy isn't just about sex, Burt. It's about me holding your head up when you puked from the chemo. It's about being man enough to be vulnerable with me.

    • Sean: And what brings you here today?
      Burt: My balls are no longer proportionate to my wang.
      Michelle: Burt was diagnosed with late-stage prostate cancer six months ago. Aside from the radiology treatments, our doctor recommended he have a bilateral orchiectomy.
      Sean: You had both testees removed?
      Christian: And you're not happy with the size of your implants now?
      Burt: Lord, no. Feels like I got an SUV riding around on training wheels down there.
      Christian: How much bigger would you like to go?
      Burt: How about kiwi size? (to Michelle) That's how you first described them to me. (to Sean and Christian) All my life I had a pair that made me feel like a man. I made my living eating up pet shops and shitting out circuses.
      Michelle: My husband's a medical venture capitalist.
      Burt: Landau Industries can take a half-assed HMO or radiology lab and make it profitable in six months. Six months! Brains, brains can help you recognise an opportunity but it is balls that make you a risk-taker. And these ten-year-old-boy pits I got down there are sucking out all my oomph!

    • Sean: Christian! Come in here and check out my balls!
      I don't know about you, but I always thought the size of a man's testes were secondary to proportion. (holding up 40cc neuticals) You could sink the Bismarck with these things.

    • Dr. Wolper: I'm forcing you to take an honest look at your behavior since there doesn't seem to be anyone else in your life willing to do it.
      Christian: Actually, Sean does that, thank you very much.
      Wolper: Ah yes -- the man who has everything you wish you had.
      Christian: He's my best friend. He doesn't demand anything in return like every other goddamn woman I've ever been with. I don't have to take care of him, and I don't have to take care of his fragile little ego.

    • Christian: You look beautiful. You've got that beautiful "mother's glow" about you.
      Julia: It's called "retaining water." My feet are so swollen I can barely walk.

    • Faith Wolper: Watching your lover give themselves to you and allowing them to witness your own surrender is a shared connection. It takes trust and courage to be that vulnerable. When you climax behind their back her identity doesn't matter. She's just a substitute for your hand.

    • Julia: It's about the baby.
      Sean: You lost it?
      Julia: No.
      Sean: It's Christian's?
      Julia: * shakes her head no *
      Sean: There's ... something wrong with the baby?

    • Sean: This isn't a burden I'm tied to. This is our child.
      Christian: Well, maybe it's time to let your kid grow up.

    • Sean: Buy us? We're not for sale!
      Christian: We are at this price.

    • Julia's Lunch Date: Life is more about embracing your imperfections. How else can we embrace anyone else's?

    • Sean: Get Christian on the Bat Phone.

    • Christian's shrink: Maybe the reason your relationships with women keep failing is because you're already taken. ... Have you considered the possibility that maybe you're in love with your partner?

    • Mom: I was suckin' dick when you were suckin' on pacifiers. Watch and learn.
      Christian: You guys do this together a lot?
      Daughter: Ever since I was 16. She caught me with my stepdad.
      Christian: Get out. This is too screwed up even for me.

    • Liz: His-and-her facelifts. If this is indicative of the state of relationships in the 21st century, then I'm staying single.
      Christian: And cocker spaniels all over south Florida howl in relief.

  • Notes

    • First appearances by Sanaa Lathan (Michelle) and Larry Hagman (Burt).

    • Original International Air Dates:
      Germany: April 17, 2007 on payTV-station
      Czech Republic: November 19, 2008 on TV Nova

    • Kathleen Turner (Cindy), Brooke Shields (Faith) and Sanaa Lathan (Michelle) were credited as "Special Guest Stars". At the same time, Lathan received the "And" credit.

    • Larry Hagman receives the "Special Appearance by" credit. He is the first actor to be credited this way.

    • Music featured in the episode:
      "Boogie oogie oogie" by A Taste of Honey (Sean and Christian celebrate their anniversary in a bar)
      "Love is in the air" by John Paul Young (Sean and Christian having sex with their respective partners)
      "Notas" by Gotan Project (Christian talks with Riley and Jill after having sex with them)
      "You sexy thing" by Hot Chocolate (Sean performing surgery on Mrs Plumb)
      "Diferente" by Gotan Project (Christian implants testicles in Burt Landau)
      "Tired of being alone" by Al Green (Christian has sex with Faith)

    • Although listed in the opening credits, John Hensley and Kelly Carlson do not appear in this episode. This was the first premiere without the entire regular cast.

  • Allusions

    • Christian: What are we cooking?
      Julia: We have "Chicken Tetrazzini". Annie saw it on Rachel Ray.

      Rachel Ray is a chef on The Food Network. Her recipe for Chicken Tetrazzini first aired on "30-Minute Meals" in February of 2005.

      Apparently, Julia and Annie watch The Food Network together. When they join the scene, Julia is telling Annie to retrieve the mushrooms from the bottom shelf of the fridge behind the yogurt. As you can see, mushrooms are in Ray's ingredient list for the recipe.

      Ray's recipe, titled Tremendous Tetrazzini, is located on her website.