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Penn & Teller: Bullshit!

Season 2 Episode 7

Yoga, Tantric Sex, Etc.

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Aired Monday 10:00 PM May 13, 2004 on Showtime
8.8
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Episode Summary

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From yoga to crystals to herbs, New Age crap is everywhere. The hosts gleefully expose the B.S. of Tarot Cards, then travel to the Mecca of the New Age movement: Sedona, Arizona, where they chant, sing, and unsuccessfully seek a higher consciousness. Special Guest Experts include: Mark Wexler (Tarot Test Reader #1) Sasha Lessin (Tantric Sex Instructor) Alma Lopez (Tarot Test Reader #3) Reginah Perlmutter (Tarot Test Reader #2) Jim Underdown (Investigator, Center for Inquiry West) Beth Shaw (Yoga Fit Training Systems Worldwide) Tim Porter (Scientist/Professor of Physics, Northern Arizona State University) Suzanne McMillan-McTavish (Sedona Heart Center) Pete Sanders (MIT Honors Grad, Author, Scientific Vortex Lecturer) Janet Lessin (Tantric Sex Instructor) Rick Ross (Cult and New Age Researcher) Otis Sherrington (Herbalist)moreless

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    • TRIVIA (0)

    • QUOTES (12)

      • [last lines of the episode]
        Perlmutter: [to the crew after the reading] That was, by the way, not the greatest reading of my whole life. I mean, this was not very convincing. Was anybody here really convinced?

      • Wexler: Tarot card reading...I would not call a science.
        Penn: He admits it????
        Wexler: I also do palmistry. That I would call a science.
        Penn: OH FOR F*CK'S SAKE!

      • Teller: [as the vagina puppet during the tantric segment] HEY! Don't cut away! Show the f*cking! Show the f*cking!
        Penn: No, this...this is an investigative show.
        Teller: BULLSH**!
        Penn: Exactly. Listen.

      • Penn: [during the tantric sex segment] Don't you love having cable?

      • Penn: [holding a vagina puppet] Sweetheart, I'd like to polish your pearl. Would you like that? [puts puppet over Teller's mouth]
        Teller: [as the puppet] Oh yes, Mr. Jillette, but don't you think you'd like to drink a glass of water while I sing a song first?
        Penn: Oh...oh oh...okay...yeah yeah...can I have a glass of water, thank you thank you...here we go. [drinks]
        Teller: [as the puppet, sings] My body lies over the ooooocean....my body lies over the seeeeeeeeea.....
        Penn: [laughing while he drinks] Okay, okay, I'm going to drown.

      • Penn: We like Sedona! It's a beautiful place for a vacation. We like people jumping around like coyotes and miming giant d*cks! We love that 4 million tourists visit there every year, and they spend 50 million dollars! That's all just great! We understand people having fun and making money! We just don't understand why they need bullsh** vortexes!

      • McMillan-McTavish: [performing ritual in a parking lot] Now take your tobacco and just sprinkle it on the Mother Earth.
        Penn: Or CRUSH your tobacco on the mother ASPHALT!

      • Penn: [on MIT graduate and vortex supporter Pete Sanders] You know...college isn't really for everyone. But, that's a bullsh** show we're saving for season 3!

      • Penn: Our sting was working like a charm...well not really like a charm at all. A charm doesn't do dick. Our scam is working like a clock. Like a working clock with a fresh battery!

      • Penn: We'll get back to Mark [Wexler] in a bit, but lets show you what happened with our next test subject who isn't quite sure WHAT she is.
        Perlmutter: Hello, my name is Reginah Perlmutter, and I'm a tarot reader. [BEEP] Hello, my name is Reginah Perlmutter, and I'm a tarot reader and a psychic. [BEEP] Hello, my name is Reginah Perlmutter. I'm a tarot reader, a psychic, and a psychotherapist.

      • Penn: So what do herbs like wormwood and echinacea supposedly do? See if you can follow this.
        Sherrington: Herbs...are...I should say...I would say easily digested and become part of and combine with the human body when there's a peaceful, stressless mental condition...called health. Healthy mental attitude towards herbs...toward herbs...towards healing and letting go of problems...herbs work much more better that way. And they even work to some degree without that condition.
        Penn: If you believe they work, they work. If you don't, they don't. You hardly EVER hear that about penicillin.

      • Penn: We have a bullsh** theory. It's quite simple actually. It's just...we don't think ANYONE believes this new age cr*p. Not the people selling it, not the people buying it, NO ONE. They like candlelight, someone to talk to about their problems. They like acting silly, or a hike through some pretty countryside. But if you sat 'em down to a cup of coffee, look 'em in the eye, they'd admit new age is just an excuse to take some time out to get a massage.

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