Pepper Dennis

Knuckles: Long speech, Oprah. Now I'm really gonna have to cut you. Pepper: (taking Knuckles down) It's not Oprah, Tinkerbell, Lois Lane, Little Debbie, Cinderella, Grass bag, Blondie, or Goldilocks. It's Pepper Dennis and I gotta eat here too are we clear? Cause if we're not I am happy to take you down breaking news style. Knuckles: I like Grass bag.

Charlie: In the last five years Lunchsac has lost ten contracts around the Midwest for serving expired food. That jumpsuit is so bad girl. Pepper: So why does this jail keep renewing their contract? Most of these women have filed food poisoning complaints. Charlie: I couldn't find a single one on file with the DOC. Just so we're clear, there's not gonna be any conjugating? Pepper: The complaints must be getting buried, but why? To protect Lunchsac? Charlie: Political connections, money, the room was designed for it and I did bring flowers. Pepper: Money. What if the state is cutting corners at these inmates expense? Do we know what they claim they're paying for the food? Charlie: State budget's four dollars per meal per inmate. Pepper: But we don't know what they're actually paying Lunchsac. Guard: (knocks) Two minutes. (Awkward silence) Pepper: Come on Babcock, this is the part where you say, 'two minutes, I can do it in one and a half', and then you unzip something. And then I pretend to ignore all subsequent libidinous comments, which is what we normally do in the real world. Outside of here, which seems so far away right now. Charlie: I'm sorry Dennis. I'm an idiot. I was just trying to keep it light, you know, cheer you up. Pepper: I know. It's okay. Charlie: You know when I got here I couldn't believe it. Everyone expected it to be Camp Cupcake but it's pretty awful huh? Pepper: I wouldn't recommend it. But I'll survive. Charlie: Yep, you will. Not a lot of people have the strength to make it through something like this, Dennis. I couldn't. Pepper: Thanks.

Les: I've reserved 5 minutes in each broadcast for a jailhouse update. Pepper: Leslie Gay listen to me! You will cancel all interviews or publicity or so help me god, I'll be in here for murder! Yours! Les: You started this! I'm only trying to make lemonade. Pepper: Well you're back to lemons, because I'm shutting down my visitor's list.