Pepper Dennis

Charlie: I'm the voice of trust and truth, I'm the Japanese face of Crest White strips, I'm the one in the power position Les not you. Where's your poster Gay? Pepper: Hold on, Babcock. Are you saying that of all the outrages and moral injustices we face everyday, this is where you take your stand? Charlie: My teeth are my signature. They're gonna help me go down in broadcast history along with Anderson Cooper's hair, and Ed Bradley's earring, and Brian William's fake tan, so you guys just need to back off. Pepper: Why do you have to do this? Charlie: What? Pepper: Open your big dumb mouth. (Pepper walks off) Les: I thought you Canadians were supposed to be a compliant people. Charlie: Sorry Les, you thought wrong.

Charlie: That is utterly depressing and you are giddy with excitement. Pepper: I always get revved up before a sting. Charlie: No, there's a spring in your step because you've proven those people looking for true love aren't going to find it. Pepper: This isn't about love. It's about fraud. And don't tell me you believe in all that mush. Charlie: Do you even know what a soul mate is Dennis? Pepper: An ancient fabrication that captivates the masses and guarantees employment to Meg Ryan and Mark Ruffalo. Charlie: It's the coming together of two kindred spirits, finding the yin to one's yang. Meeting the person who knows what you need even before you do.

Pepper: (recording herself) Note to myself: Kimmy Kim is a sneaky little pedophile!

Pepper: The old "we can't give you a refund because our boss is in Gstaad" routine. Let me give you a tip: in news circles they call me the sheriff - because I always get my man.