Tommy Lasorda: It's my pitching, Johnny. Do you think I need another starter?
Johnny: How should I know? (Tommy pays him off) The rigors of a full season on a four-man rotation are just too demanding. You need a left-handed swing man to fill your long relief spots. Give him an occasional start and he'll round out your staff nicely.
Tommy Lasorda: You're talking about a guy like Gossage, aren't you, Johnny?
Johnny: Oh, come on, Tommy, use your head. Gossage is right-handed. And besides, he can't throw more than two innings. Here's the names of five southpaws with career ERAs of 2.93. And you wouldn't have been in this mess if you hadn't given up Tommy John.
(Tommy hangs his head in shame)