Psych

Shawn: Is old Lassie back in the game? Lassiter: It is none of your business with whom I spend my personal time. Shawn: Now you have to dish. She blond? Gus: Brunette? Shawn: Mail order? Gus: You sly dog. Lassiter: Please, I am not gonna engage in some juvenile masculinity contest. Shawn: He went by himself. Gus: Yeah. (Lassiter stands up angrily) Lassiter: Her name is Polly Smith. 324 Sycamore Lane. We kissed. Ask her.

Shawn: I visited Wally...in prison. Gus: You went to the pen? Shawn: I went to the joint. Gus: You went to the clink?

Juliet: Carlton! I finished the powerpoint slides for your 21LES presentation. Carlton: Oh you're right, Helvetica IS a much better font. Juliet: I know! See how the M in "Double Murder Suicide" just jumps off the page?

(Lassiter, Shawn and Gus walk into the police station after discovering Lassiter's car is missing) Lassiter: Alright, just keep your mouths shut, I don't want people to think anythings wrong. Morning, O'Connell. Schwartz. Dobson. Just rapping with the fellas, shooting the breeze. Shawn: Sweet, now they'll just think it's 1974.

Juliet: (to Shawn) Good news, we've matched the serial numbers. Bad news is that they're legal. And even worst news is that Lassiter wants to know what size vest you wear.

Shawn: Gus you've been bragging about that award for over a year. Why go now? Gus: Maybe I kept pushing it back because I was always working a second job. Like when I had to enter a civil war re-enactment, or when I was protecting a sorority of pajama clad co-eds. Shawn: You're actually complaining about that? Gus: No, I'm not.

Gus: What are we looking for anyway? Shawn: Anything that points to criminal activity. You know, a white cloth sack with a green dollar sign. A red barrel labeled TNT. An anvil! Anything.

Shawn: Like I said, there's still quite a few unanswered questions. Wally: Well, what can I say? You guys got me fair and square. Shawn: That's just it. What kind of chop-shop artist steals a cop's car and doesn't chop it up? It's almost like you wanted to leave a trail. Wally: Leave a trail, don't leave a trail. Wouldn't do any good. You guys caught my quick! Snap! Mind of a cheetah. I was like what! Cops were like wham. Miranda.

Shawn: Did you ever have a case you couldn't crack? Henry: Yeah. Yeah, sure. More than a few. But, a good detective learns the most when he doesn't get the bad guy. Shawn: No, I got the bad guy. Henry: Oh, well sometimes he gets off. But, a good detective doesn't let that get him down. Shawn: No, he's still in jail. Matter of fact, Chief Vick even says it's my best work. Henry: All right, then, what's the problem? Shawn: It doesn't feel like my best work, you know? It feels too easy. Did you ever have that problem? Henry: No, Shawn. I don't recall any champagne problems like things being too easy. Shawn: I don't know, I just imagined my best work being more complicated, you know? More intricate, important and just more... more. Henry: As always, you go after something for the flash, for the excitement and when you get it, you're never satisfied. You always need something more. Shawn: That is categorically untrue. Henry: Your best case, what does it need? More excitement. Your first bike, what did it need? More reflectors. Well, Shawn, did you ever stop and think that it's your expectations that need to change? Son, look at me. Look sometimes a case is just a case. (Shawn flashes back) Shawn: Wait a minute. Wait a second, I just figured it out. Henry: Wait, wait, don't, Shawn. Don't do this. Shawn: This is so much bigger than we thought. And I was right all along! Henry: Shawn, don't you dare. Don't you dare learn a wrong lesson while I'm trying to teach you a right one. (Shawn flashes back again and starts jumping) Shawn, stop. Stop trying to figure it out! Stop jumping!

(Shawn and Gus have just raced on their rolling chairs across the hall. Lassiter stopped the race by flipping the chairs.) Lassiter: Unlike everyone else around here, I'm not fooled by the fact that you wear grownup clothes, have mastered the rudimentary levels of communication and somehow manage to feed yourselves. I see you for what you are: children. So do me a favor, and let the the grownups do their work. Shawn: (points to elbow) I got a boo-boo.