Ted: No, start blaming yourself. You know, it wouldn't have happened if you could keep your mind off sex long enough to think about something else. Emmett: Like what? Ted: Like, going to a museum or reading a book. Emmett: A book? Ted: Yeah. It's got pages...little words on it...you know...a cover. Allegedly, it improves the mind, and...oh! Hey, they happen to sell them right here. Anybody care to join me?