Queer Eye

Season 3 Episode 12

From the Doghouse to the Altar: Joe U

Aired Tuesday 12:00 AM Dec 06, 2005 on Bravo
out of 10
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Episode Summary

From the Doghouse to the Altar: Joe U
Joe and Laura met ten years ago at jury duty, and have been together ever since, despite numerous break-ups and make-ups. But Laura has told him she won't move in with him until they get engaged, prompting Joe to go out and buy ... a Harley motorbike. Laura promptly dumped him, but now he wants her back and has decided he is ready to propose -- with the Fab Five's help.moreless

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    Trivia, Notes, Quotes and Allusions


    • TRIVIA (0)

    • QUOTES (2)

      • Laura's Sister (to Joe, about Laura): There's no one else for her. She's figured that out. She's just waiting for you to figure that out.

        Jai (as Joe helps Kyan into the boat): He's offering the lady a hand. How chivalrous.

        Scott (about sailing): This is a lot of work for Laura.
        Joe: She ain't gonna want to do this.
        Kyan and Jai: She's already doing this!

        Carson: Take a gander, my little goose.

        Carson (in the Dunhill changing room): Let's get nude!

        Joe's Father: What did you do to my baby?
        Carson: Well that's a different story. That's an after-school special.

        Joe (about his proposal): How can I give you ten years of thoughts?
        Ted: Wow, that sounds like it's going to be a long-winded proposal.
        Carson: We're going to need an intermission ... popcorn.

        Thom: An Italian mother should always be in the dining room... or the kitchen!

        Carson: Uva gotta see uva new closeta, Joe Uva!

      • Carson (picking up a giant bottle of lotion right next to the bed): Here's the lotion, just where I expected! Every time.

        Jai (to Kyan): Make sweet, sweet love to me down by the fire.
        Kyan: Oh, my God. You're scaring me!

        Carson (going through Joe's closet): Oh, toasted pumpkin. That was a big color back in '74!
        Joe: Wait a minute, wait a minute! Hey, I just got that! I gotta lot of compliments on that!
        Carson: You did? From people with German shepherds and canes?

        Ted (about the motorbike): Hey Joe. Nice engagement ring! I like that. That's really nice.

        Thom: Just when you thought it couldn't get any more depressing Ted. He's got plastic utensils in plastic cups.
        Ted: Yeah.

        Kyan (picking up a baby car seat): This is what he's running from ... and this is what he's running toward... (camera pans to motorbike)

        Carson (picks up photo of Joe and Laura): Look how cute you were!
        Joe: What do you mean "were"?

        Carson and Jai (pretending to ride the motorbike): Vroom! Vrooooom!

        Carson (getting off motorbike) We have to do the Charlie's Angels move! (Takes off motorbike helmet and flips his hair, à la Charlie's Angels)

        Carson (looking at Joe's jury duty slip): I'm feeling very Legally Blonde today.

        Thom (looking at Joe's ugly plates): Let's go play frisbee!
        Ted: It's a new game called 'Toss the Hideous Dish'!
        Thom throws the plate off the balcony into the garden. They both cheer.

        The others run out, leaving Ted and Jai alone in the house
        Ted: Are they leaving us again?
        Jai: Yeah, but at least it's not too messy this time.
        Ted: Let's make chicken wings.

        Kyan: What is it about you this time that's going to be different for her?
        Joe: What's different is that I'm going to ask her to marry me.

    • NOTES (0)

    • ALLUSIONS (3)