(Jesan gets his sunglasses stuck in his hair)
Kyan: You and your damn eyeware, Carson!
Carson: No, it's your hair! You got your hair in my eyeware!
Kyan: You got your eyeware in my hair!
Ted (to Tyson): Based on the color of your shirt and what you're drinking you appear to be very secure in your masculinity.
Tyson: I really— I am.
Thom to Ted: Based on the color of your shirt and what you're drinking you're still in the closet.
Carson (manipulating the girlfriend's tattoo): Did you see her tattoo? Her skin art? I'm trying to make it wink but it just won't do it.
(After fitting into a t-shirt with Tyson Beckford)
Carson: Fantasy 400: fulfilled.