Real Time With Bill Maher

Season 6 Episode 17

September 5, 2008

Aired Friday 10:00 PM Sep 05, 2008 on HBO
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Episode Summary

September 5, 2008
Rated: TV-MA for Adult Content (AC) and Adult Language (AL)
Tonight's episode is Live from L.A.

Bill's panel tonight are:

* fmr. White House Press Secretary Scott McClellan
* fmr. Lt. Gov. Michael Steele (R-MD)
* Kerry Washington, actress starring in The Lake View Terrace.

Bill's other guests are:

* Jeffrey Toobin, CNN political analyst
* Dan Savage, Real Time correspondent.moreless

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    Scott McClellan

    Scott McClellan


    Guest Star

    Michael S. Steele

    Michael S. Steele


    Guest Star

    Kerry Washington

    Kerry Washington


    Guest Star

    Dan Savage

    Dan Savage

    Real Time Real Reporter

    Recurring Role

    Trivia, Notes, Quotes and Allusions


    • TRIVIA (0)

    • QUOTES (7)

      • Bill Maher: New Rule: Aw, perfect. If you're a baby mama trying to hide your baby daddy's baby behind your mama's baby, you just might be a redneck. At least when Obama got a convention bump, it wasn't leaking amniotic fluid.

        New Rule: Get a room. (Shows photos of McCain and Palin) John McCain has called his VP his "soul mate." Is this a running mate or a mid-life crisis? The old maverick is so hot for the MILF - he had to put a folder in front of his crotch because the "surge" was working.

        New Rule: (photo of Fred Thompson) You can't criticize someone for giving a - quote - "teleprompter speech" in a speech you are reading off a "teleprompter." Also, you can't accuse the other guy of being a celebrity when you, yourself, have been in movies, starred on TV - and modeled for a shoe company. (photo of Thompson next to Hush Puppies hound) He looks like the...

        New Rule: Democrats - Democrats must not treat Sarah Palin with kid gloves just because she's a lady. And you can start at the debates. "Sarah Barracuda" meet "Joey the Shark."

        All right, and finally, New Rule: Republicans must stop saying Obama is an elitist and just admit you don't like him because of something he can't help, something that's a result of the way he was born. Admit it. You're not voting for him because he's smarter than you.

        Now, in her acceptance speech, Governor Palin accused Obama of using his run for the White House as a "journey of personal discovery." This from the lady who just spent ten minutes introducing her family: Track - Track, Trig, Bristol, Piper. For a minute there, I thought she was calling in an airstrike.

        Karl Rove described Obama as - quote - "the guy at the country club with the beautiful date, holding a martini and making snide comments about everyone who passes by." Unlike George Bush, who is the guy at the country club who makes snide comments and then passes out.

        Now, this characterization, of course, was something Mr. Rove just pulled out of his bulbous, gelatinous ass - but, remember, this is America, where people believe anything they hear. One of McCain's ads casts Obama as "the one," implying he thinks he's the Messiah. Well, good, maybe he can raise McCain from the dead.

        But, it doesn't matter to Karl Rove that his country club caricature is made up. It's the role that Obama must play if the party of plutocrats is going to win over the little guy. But, Barack Obama can't help it is he's a magna cum laude Harvard grad and you're a Wal-Mart shopper - who resurfaces driveways with your brother-in-law.

        Americans are so narcissistic that our candidates have to be just like us: not very bright. And that's where the McCain camp gets their strategy. Paint Obama as cocky and arrogant and wait for America to vote him off like the black guy in every reality show.

        A black president? Half of Pennsylvania isn't ready for a black quarterback! Forget Obama. They think Will Smith needs to be taken down a peg. And they may be right about that one, I can tell you.

        And as for "Country First," you know who's putting "Country First"? I am. By supporting Obama. Because a victory this fall for the McCain-Mooseburger ticket...would make my job the next four years very, very easy.

      • Dan Savage: Speaking about Levi Johnston If there was a black teenage male with a MySpace page that was any way comparable to that white kid's MySpace page... and he was Barack Obama's daughter's baby daddy, the election would be over.

      • Michael Steele: What you fail to understand about small towns - small towns are where particularly women get their start in politics... A significant number of the women in this country - mayors in this country - are women. My point is, when you come out - the first statements out of your mouth on the Obama campaign is to belittle her service as a mayor of a small town of 9,000, what signal are you sending to all the women you've already ticked off by not picking Hillary and the way you treated Hillary during the campaign?

      • Kerry Washington: Yeah, but, at least, you know, at the Democratic Convention, you had problems put out and then you had solutions to fix them. (McCain) was talking about all the kids that he - this autistic kid he's fighting for, this person he's fighting for, that person he's fighting for - but he didn't tell me what that fight looks like. He didn't talk to me about every American having health care. He didn't talk to me about every American having access to real education. He talked about choices, as if that's the problem: people can't choose what salad they want on the menu. That's not the problem. The problem is there's no salad on the menu!

      • Dan Savage: And you know what else we could talk about? The fact that Sarah Palin opposes abortion, thinks it should be illegal in all cases, including rape and incest. And, yet, praised her own daughter for the decision she made to carry this baby to term.

      • Bill Maher: Fred Thompson said, "She's from a small town" - Sarah Palin, he was talking about - "with small town values. But, that's not good enough for the people attacking her." Well, excuse me, it's not good enough! To be from a small town with small-town values is supposed to be good enough to be in the second-most important job in the world?! Are you kidding me?!

      • Bill Maher: Obama went on the "Bill O'Reilly Show" last night. Anybody catch that? Ooh. I thought O'Reilly was tough... but fair. Cordial, but I didn't like that he was always checking to see if his wallet was still there.

    • NOTES (0)

    • ALLUSIONS (0)